Random Irritations

[Billysboots]

S.M.A.R.T.(E.R.).

For some reason, the last two rarely get mentioned. “Evaluated, Rewarded.” I wonder how many of us have been tasked with setting SMART goals but didn’t follow the process through. For me, it just overcomplicates a job. “Here’s the task, go and do it.” Alternatively, let’s waste time turning it into war & peace.

The “rewarded” element never applied in the public sector, Bri, so we didn’t bother with it

 

[srixon 1]

They were a colaberation between VW and Mercedes, VW Crafter, Merc Sprinter.
At least it's not the new Transporter which is a Ford Transit.

It’s better than our other van, which is an E-Transit. Range of about 140 miles on a full charge. We have solar panels on the roof of our building so it costs virtually nothing to charge it up. A real pain though if you need to do a long round trip and have to wait a hour somewhere while it charges so that you can get back to base.

 

[Sid Rixon IV]

Bought a new pair of chinos in M&S yesterday. Tried them on when I got home - perfect, as M&S sizes always are for me.
Cut the tags off today and set of to Sainsbury's sporting them whilst wife was at a gym class.
Had a quiet pint with my newspaper on way back.
Got home and wife noticed I was wearing them. Looks at me and says "Really?"
I look down and see I'm still wearing the sticky strip down the side declaring my waist and leg size.
Worse, she says "And your fly's wide open".

(She'd put this in the Laughter thread!)

 

[Junior]

Performance goal setting, today is the deadline. Every year I have to do this rubbish and every year I have no idea what to put. Apparently having the goal of doing all your work to the best of your ability, leaving on time and getting paid, is not acceptable. Let's see what ChatGPT thinks I should put.

We had a thing about targets being "SMART". Simple manageable achievable realistic time-bound.

At a staff meeting one time, I was asked directly by a manager whether I knew what a SMART target was. I said, "Yes".
When I was pushed for the full meaning of SMART, I responded, "Some more absolutely ridiculous tosh." (there followed some laughter around the room)

When you have less than 3 years to retirement, no desire to climb any ladder and more experience than those above you, work can become great fun sometimes.

Being a slave to the American corporate machine I’ve had to go through this for the last 28 years, on both sides of the table.

Actually, our pay rises and bonus depend on the outcome so whilst it’s a ball ache, spending a bit of time doing it can be fruitful.

As long as it’s managed properly, it’s good from a leadership point of view to keep people honest and on track. I have also known performance review ratings to be counted in redundancy scoring exercises.

I’ve spent 20 minutes on them with people who are just happy ticking a long and doing the same job and I’ve spent 2 hours on them with young people who want to progress t heir careers. Both are fine imo. It’s how they are executed that’s the important thing.

 

[Bazz]

My bonus and pay rise are dependent on my objectives and if I hit them or not, the most work I do all year is putting my evidence together.

 

[Neilds]

My bonus and pay rise are dependent on my objectives and if I hit them or not, the most work I do all year is putting my evidence together.

Same for me
And it’s that time of year again.

 

[Hobbit]

Red dust, again. The table on the terrace is covered in red dust.

I guess there were strong winds over the Sahara earlier this week.

 

[PhilTheFragger]

Red dust, again. The table on the terrace is covered in red dust.

I guess there were strong winds over the Sahara earlier this week.

Parp

 

[upsidedown]

Red dust, again. The table on the terrace is covered in red dust.

I guess there were strong winds over the Sahara earlier this week.

Blowing a right hoolie in Lanzarote 🌬

 

[Bazz]

Same for me
And it’s that time of year again.

I've had "above expectations" four years in a row now, doing something right.

 

[IanM]

I've had "above expectations" four years in a row now, doing something right.

Was always amused when organisations used that label.

How high were the expectations?

 

[Bazz]

Was always amused when organisations used that label.

How high were the expectations?

Well done for not being as bad as we thought you'd be. Here's a tenner.

 

[D-S]

The orange ones latest war making some really loud bangs in the local area. I think our flight is going to be a tad delayed.

 

[Red devil]

My bonus and pay rise are dependent on my objectives and if I hit them or not, the most work I do all year is putting my evidence together.

As long as I turn up on time drug and alcohol free and do my job and go home, that's it for me, thank God.
Lot to be thankful for reading the responses above

 

[IanM]

My worse Appraisal experience was the 3 years I spent working for an Insurance Consultancy.

They had a belt and braces heavy duty appraisal process, tell people they'd been super-dooper, but then say there was no budget for any pay rises, but thanks for your efforts. Meanwhile, hefty bonuses paid to the directors.... although they didn't get an actual rise!

I foolishly thought I could change things and stayed about 18 months longer than I should have done!

 

[Arthur Wedge]

The Worlds self appointed police starting World War 3 in the Middle east

 

[Red devil]

The Worlds self appointed police starting World War 3 in the Middle east

Little choice. Iran were about to reveal the missing Epstein files!

 

[KenL]

Iran.

 

[KenL]

Little choice. Iran were about to reveal the missing Epstein files!

Is that meant to be a joke?

 

[Fade and Die]

Is that meant to be a joke?

Made me laugh.