My first day on Jury Service..............

[Smiffy]

Got to the courts at 9.30. Shown into a room where there were about 24 other "possible" jurors. Shown a video on what to expect.
Then sat there until 11.00am until we were allowed out for a fag for 10 minutes.
Came back in room, sat there again until 1.00pm when told to leave for lunch.
Came back in room and sat there again until 3.00pm and then just told we could go home.
That was it.
Just sitting there. Waiting. And doing nothing.
What a waste of a day.
And you have to pay 25p for a cup of crap coffee

 

[USER1999]

Sounds like what I do at work.

Never been asked to do Jury service. Must be off their radar.

 

[Smiffy]

Never been asked to do Jury service. Must be off their radar.

I thought I was

Best bit was parking. SatNav indicated parking about 200 yards away from the court. Drove in, short term parking only, 2 hours max. Bugger. I knew I was going to be in there most of the day so had to find somewhere else.
Drove to the next shown parking area, great. Long term. £4.00 for 8 hours. Would the ticket machine take notes? Would it bollocks. Of course, we all walk around with loads and loads of £ coins in our pocket don't we. You'd have thought with parking charges being the way they are they'd come up with a bloody ticket machine that takes notes...
Ran around like mad trying to find a shop that could change up a tenner, couldn't find one. Had to go in Sussex Stationers and buy a roll of bloody birthday wrapping paper for £2.99 to get some poxy change. And I had 5 minutes to get back to the car, and then leg it to the courthouse.
Then we are informed that we should have come on the train, and if we bought the car they would only pay a maximum of £2.00 per day parking because there is one car park in Lewes that charges that all day. The fact that nobody knows where the bloody place is didn't even enter into it.
A great start to a great day.

 

[USER1999]

You're not selling it to me.

 

[teegirl]

This reads like an extract from a Grumpy Old Men script. lol
Great programme, Bob likes it too,

Two weeks normal jury service? I hope it's not warm and sunny and perfic golfing weather every day.

 

[Smiffy]

This reads like an extract from a Grumpy Old Men script. lol

I was grumpy Jan. Definitely.

 

[CrapHacker]

Just don't mention my name.

You 'aven't seen me, right



Sounds like a shorrible way to spend a day. I hope at least they find you a good case for the rest of your time.

 

[viscount17]

I just hope that no reality tv producers are reading this !

 

[richart]

You were in a room with 24 punters and you didn't sell them a car ! Who are you, and what have you done with Smiffy ?

Oh and my birthday is not till May, bit i suppose it's a good idea to get the wrapping paper early.

 

[bobmac]

Oh and my birthday is not till May, bit i suppose it's a good idea to get the wrapping paper early.

Knowing Smiffy, that's all you'll get, wrapping paper

 

[Leftie]

Smiffy.

If you want to get selected rather sit around all day, wear your white trousers. They are always looking to balance up the diversity of jurers. PC gone mad

 

[richart]

Smiffy.

If you want to get selected rather sit around all day, wear your white trousers. They are always looking to balance up the diversity of jurers. PC gone mad

What could Smiffy in white trousers be balancing up ?

 

[USER1999]

The lack of incontinent Ping wielding cross dressing used car sales men?

 

[jammydodger]

My first day was a washout too but the next day I got a juicy sex crime case for a few days and then the next week I got another juicy case and a couple of days off after as we finished early and it wasnt worth assigning another case to us.

 

[The_LHC]

"Would the foreman of the jury please stand?"

"On the charge of Actual Bodily Harm with Intent, how do you find the defendant, guilty or not guilty?"

"KNOB!!!"

"Errrmm...."

 

[The_LHC]

I got a really boring case about a young lad riding the wrong way round a roundabout on his 125cc motocross bike and then doing wheelies in a petrol station (with a copper behind him no less!), the only reason we convicted him was because I knew the roundabout in question and told the rest of the muppets on the jury that he couldn't have seen what was coming as the vegetation on the roundabout makes it blind, otherwise they poor dears would never have been able to decide whether it was actually "careless" driving or not! Unbelievable... His brief was hopeless though, clearly brand new and had no idea what she was doing! She asked the copper the same question twice, immediately after he'd answered it and had no idea what to say to him after that! I'd have asked for my money back if I'd been paying for her to represent me...

That took two days and we got nothing else, we weren't even asked back for the second week!

 

[USER1999]

Mate of mine ended up on a fraud case. It took 9 months, and he didn't understand a word of it. In the end, the judge pretty much gave them their verdict in his summing up. He must have known no one would have understood it.
Waste of every bodies time and money.

 

[Imurg]

Something like that would be a complete nightmare for anyone. 2 weeks is bad enough but 9 months!!

I couldn't have 1 month off for Jury Service - my business would collapse and I'd have to start again from scratch.

 

[john0]

Something like that would be a complete nightmare for anyone. 2 weeks is bad enough but 9 months!!

I couldn't have 1 month off for Jury Service - my business would collapse and I'd have to start again from scratch.

Imurg if that ever happens to you, give me a shout and ill happily come and teach these fresh, innocent, 17yr old girls - will show them how to drive as well

 

[Smiffy]

Well the end of the 2nd day.
Sat there, and sat there, and sat there, and sat there, and sat there.....etc.
Got told to go home at 3.00pm no case.
Back tomorrow at 10.15.
I'm bloody loving this.
Bollocks