The problem is with his driving is when he had a Zoom interview Re his dementia, he was told he could have a driving test as the dr had stopped him From driving. He passed it. Initially we were informed he would be retested in 1 year. We think because he mentioned towing, they said retest in six months.
Is that one vistor only per week, for half an hour only? That is tough, really tough. I know some care homes have locked down completely, no visitors at all but half an hour a week is still brutal. I'm not condeming the care homes incidentally, they were badly shook up in the first wave so I understand them taking these steps.
I think this is a good shout as it could be that if the insurance company aren't informed, and there is an accident, then you might find that they would declare the insurance null and void anyway.
They will.
Unfortunately yes, the slots are very hard to come by.
That’s really sad to hear.
Not wanting to combine threads or go off on topic, but Missis T said when we were in Mexico in March. “God help the care homes”.I asked what she was on about. She mentioned through her role that she said most care homes are not prepared for this. A month or so later she was not just shocked re what was happening in care homes but the lack of what support they were getting. Re dementia patients in care homes. Bless, where do you start.
In every body else's eyes she could be saving lives. One of the many awful things about this illness is how the people who are doing their best to help end up copping flak. The nature of the beast.
But good at her job!!
Bottom line, she has been fantastic, as has all the specialists he has seen. We could not praise them enough. One would suggest there experience of dealing with Dementia patients Means they have seen most of what can and does happen. They have all the answers and answers to questions family have not thought of. Unfortunately FIL just don’t see it.
Still miffed that a driving test pass can override her diagnosis.
Sounds like you and your family have done a good job .Long post, cut short.
Just under 4 years ago the m-in-law was given the devastating news that her breast cancer from 13yrs previous had returned as Metastatic breast cancer and spread to her bones.
We took the decision to move her in to our home and look after her, it was the right thing to do for us, but understandibly isn’t for everyone for various reasons.
It’s been dificult at times, we basically put our life on hold to concentrate on her, unfortunately due to spreading to her bones it is her mobility that suffered the most, but still we’ve had a lot of smiles and laughs along the way.
Jan this year she needed radiatiin on her spine when the cancer literally took her legs, but she fought that and got back to walking with crutches, sadly then the virus hit and apart from a hospital appt in june she hadn’t been out the house, added to this my wife is disabled and son autistic it’s been a bumpy road.
The three of us keeping her company basically doing 8hr shifts, you can guess who got nights
Bonus for me in the summer was that with the light nights I got to the golf course 4-6 times a week always after 4 o’clock, but realising how lucky I was to get that break.
Sadly they stopped treatment in the summer and gave her 3-6 months, still the laughs continued and mobility descreased severly, but we started to noticed a few mental issues, very forgetful at the start then other issues.
It all came to ahead last thursday when she needed a doctor, they thought she had an infection, but nothing changed, between friday and wednesday morning I had no more than a total of 10hrs kip, she would sleep for no more than an hour and wake up needing the toilet, sometimes it was no more than 5 minutes between trips to the toilet, sadly she wasn’t actually going, but believed she had, she’d eat a meal then ask when she was having dinner, she insisted she could walk and fell twice on monday, thankfully both times I was there to catch her.
Yesterday she told she had heart pains and needed an ambulance, they turned up to her saying it was ok and the pain was now in her knee.
Throughout the whole period we’ve been superbly supported by both MacMillan Nurses and local District Nurses and they in the bsckground were trying to secure a bed in the local hospice for both care for her and respite care for us.
As the paramedics were there examining her we got the call to say they had a bed for her at the hospice, such a relief, the last thing we wanted was her being taken to hospital at the moment.
10hrs at the hospice yesterday, while they got her settled, she was very confused and agitated, back with her today to accompany her to the hospital for a MRI on her spine and brain.
She was a bit brighter today and also had us laughing, she is also getting very paranoid, she told us on our return to the hospice today to be careful what you say to the Staff as they are trying to find out our names and where we live, when asked why, she said it was because they wanted to discharge a patient to our house!!
Watching the loss of mobility was hard enough, but that was gradual, to see the brain decline almost in just weeks/days is horrifying!
Throughout all this the MacMillan Nurses, District Nurses and now Hospice Staff have been incredible, the care and attention she has and is receiving is beyond words, even the staff today at the X-Ray unit were she had her MRI, unreal.
We have no idea how long she has left, the Wife is racked with guilt that we can no longer care for her man, even though she knows it’s the right decision, but I just hope us and everyone else out there remember our incredible Nurses, Doctors and support staff at all levels in the NHS and Health Care System once we best this virus, they were there before it came along and they’ll be there when we’ve beaten it.
It’ll be our turn to look after them and make them feel safe. x
