Evesdad
Tour Winner
A big chorus of " fffoooorrrreeee rrrriiiggghhhhtttt!" Usually gets going when one of us hits the big slice. Can be heard from anywhere on the course!
Banter - Your group's favourite lines in "friendly play"
- Thread starter JohnnyDee
- Start date
Andy808
Tour Winner
There's a group of about 6 of us who play together in various groups and the banter is terrible.
One guy, Gary, has a very annoying habit of bouncing out of the trees onto the fairway or a playable position. If any of the rest of us get that kind of luck he just says "Only way to play it!"
No matter how ratty any of us get the insults still come.
Scott, who used to be a good county player, can get quite annoyed with himself resulting in the odd club hurtling back down the fairway to which he gets "Thought I heard a Merlin close by"
All skied shots get greeted with the beeps of Sputnik and "That might stay up there!"
Topped or duffed shots receive "It's just over there mate!"
Very heavy putts get "Taxi for (insert players name) it's gonna cost a fortune though!"
It makes no difference if it's a bounce game or a comp if you're out with us it's getting called. It is all light-hearted as none of us take it that seriously.
One guy, Gary, has a very annoying habit of bouncing out of the trees onto the fairway or a playable position. If any of the rest of us get that kind of luck he just says "Only way to play it!"
No matter how ratty any of us get the insults still come.
Scott, who used to be a good county player, can get quite annoyed with himself resulting in the odd club hurtling back down the fairway to which he gets "Thought I heard a Merlin close by"
All skied shots get greeted with the beeps of Sputnik and "That might stay up there!"
Topped or duffed shots receive "It's just over there mate!"
Very heavy putts get "Taxi for (insert players name) it's gonna cost a fortune though!"
It makes no difference if it's a bounce game or a comp if you're out with us it's getting called. It is all light-hearted as none of us take it that seriously.
Slab
Occasional Tour Caddy
Jeez is anyone really still using the lipstick/husband nonsense and the other guff from decades ago, you need to up your repertoire guys, a bag full of the latest gear and a head full of outdated lines. I'd rather be the one hitting the howler than trotting out some of these
Sorry had to be said
Sorry had to be said
Neilds
Assistant Pro
Played 36 holes last week and one guy insisted in using the lipstick 'gag' every time one of us left a putt short, was really boring after 5 holes - just think what it was like towards the end!!!
trouble is, the guy still thought he was being original and funny
JohnnyDee
Tour Winner
I don't think anyone is suggesting that these are particularly original or indeed side-splitting really. Nevertheless they are often part of social golf.
My interest is more about trying to find if there are any regional variations or ones I may not have heard before.
Of course I do understand that some people treat the game with respect, reverence and a seriousness that precludes them from making any utterance Should anything go wrong, except perhaps for a 'tut' or if pushed maybe a considered 'mmph!'
My interest is more about trying to find if there are any regional variations or ones I may not have heard before.
Of course I do understand that some people treat the game with respect, reverence and a seriousness that precludes them from making any utterance Should anything go wrong, except perhaps for a 'tut' or if pushed maybe a considered 'mmph!'
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Slab
Occasional Tour Caddy
Trouble is the funny ones tend to be funny because of the players involved and their relationships/history
Some of the genuinely funny banter I hear I couldn't even post on here, a, because it may be a bit more adult that the site would like or b, because it wouldn't actually mean anything to folk who don't know us or the history/personalities etc
The danger of generic (aged) banter is that simply comes over as... well anything other than banter really
JustOne
Ryder Cup Winner
"Those lessons are really paying off"
"HOW MUCH were those clubs, £600 and you can't hit 'em!"
"Perhaps someone else might be able to hit those"
"You probably won't make it onto next years golf trip playing like that"
"Is that Poulter clothing broken?"
"Don't worry I've seen other forumers play that crap"
"HOW MUCH were those clubs, £600 and you can't hit 'em!"
"Perhaps someone else might be able to hit those"
"You probably won't make it onto next years golf trip playing like that"
"Is that Poulter clothing broken?"
"Don't worry I've seen other forumers play that crap"
Doh
Journeyman Pro
Good shot madam, when i decide to lay up.
"SPIN" for a thinned bunker shot.
"SPIN" for a thinned bunker shot.
Andy808
Tour Winner
If any of us go long then there's a call of "I hope that's got the beer order on it" as a few of our holes aim towards nearby villages with pubs in. One Tuesday roll up Gary was in the last group and while waiting for them to finish the 9th a ball appeared from over the trees bounced a couple of times on the grass and stopped on the patio with "Two ciders and one coke" written on it. Was hilarious at the time.
if a putt is missed usually someone will mutter "Squeaky Bum" and if you fail to get out of a bunker its usually "sand in the Poosey" that one is a long story
MendieGK
Tour Winner
Hacker Khan
Yurt Dwelling, Yoghurt Knitter
I don't think anyone is suggesting that these are particularly original or indeed side-splitting really. Nevertheless they are often part of social golf.
My interest is more about trying to find if there are any regional variations or ones I may not have heard before.
Of course I do understand that some people treat the game with respect, reverence and a seriousness that precludes them from making any utterance Should anything go wrong, except perhaps for a 'tut' or if pushed maybe a considered 'mmph!'
When I've played in China I've often heard 出租車約翰遜 Bloody hilarious it is, creases me up every time.
Duckster
Tour Rookie
:rofl:
richart
Major Champion
JohnnyDee
Tour Winner
"Bad luck! I think the wind's got hold of that."
Flat calm day as someone slices it 100 yards off the fairway
Flat calm day as someone slices it 100 yards off the fairway
Crazyface
Tour Winner
Just made it....... as a ball bounces up the fairway towards a bunker and straight in.
JohnnyDee
Tour Winner
M1ke
Assistant Pro
"It's a worker"
Paul_Stewart
Tour Rookie
We had a bloke at our place the other week who was in the trees looking for his ball and someone commented "what are you doing in there? You're normally on the fairway".
After the round, the idiot threatened to put in a written complaint as it "was unbecoming a member to insult another on the course".
He got absolutely laughed out of sight so didn't bother.
After the round, the idiot threatened to put in a written complaint as it "was unbecoming a member to insult another on the course".
He got absolutely laughed out of sight so didn't bother.
Paul77
Challenge Tour Pro
I see the lighter side to Golf more and more these days but I dare not say anything to my playing partner when he duffs it 20 yards with a 3 wood.
I did say "We'd better leave a 6 pack for the greenskeeper, for you leaving such a mess on the tee boxes" It went down like a ton of bricks lol
I did say "We'd better leave a 6 pack for the greenskeeper, for you leaving such a mess on the tee boxes" It went down like a ton of bricks lol
