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Laughter - the best medicine

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Two tigers have a drinking competition and one is left flat out on the floor smashed out of his skull. The other one staggers off back to the zoo when the bar-tender says "oi you can't leave that lying there".
"It's a tiger not a lion you idiot" it replies.
 
An egg and a sausage on a frying pan.
"Wow it's hot here" said the egg.
"Blimey a talking egg" replied the sausage.
 
My tip for the Grand National is Ronseal. It's good over fences.
 
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