Laughter - the best medicine

[Leftie]

And they can get far, far worse.


My mate needed a bone marrow transplant. We found a match in Argentina and the operation was a success. Our thanks go to Diego Marrow Donor.

 

[YandaB]

The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron,

which is ironic.

 

[GreiginFife]

 

[GreiginFife]

 

[rosecott]

 

[Smiffy]

 

[rulefan]

The adjective for metal is metallic, but not so for iron,

which is ironic.

And it's mad that the adjective for the moon isn't lunatic

 

[SocketRocket]

Someone has drilled a peep hole into the Ladies shower room.

The Police are looking into it.

 

[SocketRocket]

Vandals have smashed all the toilets in the Police Station.

A spokesman said they currently have nothing to go on.

 

[Leftie]

In bed Chinese guy tentatively suggests to his wife they try a 69. She is outraged!

"If you think I'm cooking at this time of night…"

 

[Deleted member 18645]

A man was arrested last night for going mental on the church bells for two hours starting at midnight.

He is going to be awarded the No Peace Bell Prize.

 

[Dando]

 

[Leftie]

Just got home and found the door and windows open and everything gone. What kind of sick person does that to someone's advent calendar?

 

[Leftie]

I went to a positive thinking class today.
It was half empty.

 

[ExRabbit]

Any chance you're going to run out of these any time soon? So I can have one big groan at the end rather than doing them individually ?

Now look what you've gone and done!!!

 

[bobmac]

A guy goes to the psychiatrist and says I think I'm a dog.
Psychiatrist ...Ok, lie on the couch
Guy ... I'm not allowed on the furniture

 

[Deleted member 18645]

REQUEST TO MODERATORS
Anyone who posts a "gag" on here that would only be fit for a Christmas cracker needs to get an infraction.

 

[rulefan]

REQUEST TO MODERATORS
Anyone who posts a "gag" on here that would only be fit for a Christmas cracker needs to get an infraction.

Too late. As advent calendars are now being opened Christmas cracker jokes are what we need

 

[Deleted member 18645]

Too late. As advent calendars are now being opened Christmas cracker jokes are what we need

Now look here, my dog's got no nose .....

 

[bobmac]

Now look here, my dog's got no nose .....

How does she smell?