Laughter - the best medicine

[Slime]

A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughter's bedroom, when she opened the door she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator.
"What are u doing?" She exclaimed!!!
The daughter replied,"I'm 35 & still living at home with my parents & this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband".
Later that week the father was in the kitchen & heard a humming sound coming from the basement. When he went downstairs, he found his daughter naked on the sofa with her vibrator.
"What are u doing?" He exclaimed!!!
The daughter replied, "I'm 35 & still living at home with my parents & this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband".
A couple of days later the mother heard the humming sound again, this time in the living room. In there she found her husband watching the England game on TV with the vibrator buzzing away beside him.
"What are u doing?" She exclaimed!!!
He replied..........
"Watching the game with my Son-In-Law".

 

[Dando]

 

[toyboy54]

Perfect timing and the perfect pressie for a smart ass forum member I've never met.

THE MIND BOGGLES
Good game going on at Hampden tonight-look like a team enjoying themselves!..( please do not come back and bite me on the-attachment 39511)

 

[Hobbit]

LOL…

Amazon fulfilment Centre……….. Lol, a warehouse is called a fulfilment centre. Sorry but it made me laugh.

 

[Crow]

LOL…

Amazon fulfilment Centre……….. Lol, a warehouse is called a fulfilment centre. Sorry but it made me laugh.

Well you shouldn't laugh, a management team probably spent 6 months and £750,000 coming up with that name.

 

[drdel]

Well you shouldn't laugh, a management team probably spent 6 months and £750,000 coming up with that name.

Is that Amazon thinking ' Outside the box" ?

 

[clubchamp98]

LOL…

Amazon fulfilment Centre……….. Lol, a warehouse is called a fulfilment centre. Sorry but it made me laugh.

What’s it called if they havnt got what you want in stock.?

 

[sweaty sock]

An argos fulfillment centre

 

[Voyager EMH]

Argos Anti-climax Centre

 

[Slime]

Whatisthatlongbuttonatthebottomofthekeyboardfor?

 

[Dando]

 

[Blue in Munich]

View attachment 39535

Mrs BiM says it must have been a simple argument...

but she did have a little smile.

 

[Slime]

Mrs Slime yelled from the bedroom,
"Do you ever get a shooting pain right through your body like someone's got a voodoo doll of you and they're stabbing it?"
I replied, "No."
She yelled back, "How about now?"

 

[clubchamp98]

Mrs Slime yelled from the bedroom,
"Do you ever get a shooting pain right through your body like someone's got a voodoo doll of you and they're stabbing it?"
I replied, "No."
She yelled back, "How about now?"

I bet OGS does!

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

It’s not Hilarious but made me smile…got an expensive four page colour A4 leaflet through the door this morning from local well established estate agency - things to do when presenting your house to the market.

And under ‘Sniff out Problems’ they talk of dog and cooking smells…and conclude that we should ‘…improve the oil factory impact of walking through your door’ ?

Don‘t you just love predicated text…

 

[Dando]

a bride on her wedding night says to her husband, " i have a confession to make my love, I used to be a hooker"

stunned he replies "that's a shock, but i find it pretty erotic. tell me more."

she replies, "well my name was Nigel and i played for Wigan"

 

[Slime]

Just finished reading an excellent book called 'Fights on a Narrow Boat' by R G Bargee.

 

[Fade and Die]

At the risk of being branded Xenophobic…?

How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?


One. They’re very efficient and not very funny.

 

[Dando]

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

What do you call a homeless sex addict … a hobosexual? ?