To take a sabbatical or not?

[la_lucha]

So I’ve been playing Golf for around 3 years now.

I hit a nice ball, I putt reasonably well and I’m not too bad at chipping. BUT I’m terribly inconsistent. I can play 9 holes 2 over par and then play the next 9 14 over. I can birdie a hole and then triple the next three and I do so on a regular basis. What I can’t do is string together 18 holes. My current handicap is 19.2 with my lowest being 18.3.

I understand the technicalities of the swing and I know what I’ve done wrong generally. I just don’t have enough time to practice with an FT job and a young family.

I’m really thinking of knocking it on the head for a few years and coming back when the kids are a little older.

We’re talking what 5-10 years when I can take the little ones up for a game? I’m not getting out what I’m putting in at the moment and it’s purely because I can’t practice enough.

Has anyone here given up for a while and come back? Is it worthwhile stopping if you’re not enjoying it as much as you should be?

I’m at a real crossroads here and with subs due in the next month I feel I may benefit from some time away from the game.

 

[CheltenhamHacker]

So I’ve been playing Golf for around 3 years now.

I hit a nice ball, I putt reasonably well and I’m not too bad at chipping. BUT I’m terribly inconsistent. I can play 9 holes 2 over par and then play the next 9 14 over. I can birdie a hole and then triple the next three and I do so on a regular basis. What I can’t do is string together 18 holes. My current handicap is 19.2 with my lowest being 18.3.

I understand the technicalities of the swing and I know what I’ve done wrong generally. I just don’t have enough time to practice with an FT job and a young family.

I’m really thinking of knocking it on the head for a few years and coming back when the kids are a little older.

We’re talking what 5-10 years when I can take the little ones up for a game? I’m not getting out what I’m putting in at the moment and it’s purely because I can’t practice enough.

Has anyone here given up for a while and come back? Is it worthwhile stopping if you’re not enjoying it as much as you should be?

I’m at a real crossroads here and with subs due in the next month I feel I may benefit from some time away from the game.

If you don't enjoy it, stop. If you do enjoy it, keep going.

Stop thinking about your handicap, that shouldn't be the driver. How much you enjoy it should be the reason to get out of the house and play.

 

[GB72]

Totally agree, golf is a hobby and meant to be fun, if you are not enjoying it irrespective of how you play then it is time to give it a rest. I cannot think of anything that I would willingly do in my spare time if I did not enjoy it and golf is just the same. The second that I do not get enjoyment from simply being out on the course with good company then the clubs will go in the cupboard until further notice and I will find something that I do enjoy to take its place.

 

[Paul77]

When I was 28 I gave up golf because I couldn't find the time for the practice. It was always just round after round and the Mrs phoning me on the 12th asking if I was finished yet. I had two young girls too so I just chucked it. Sold everything and thought I wouldn't ever go back to it. I'm 38 now, divorced and my girls live with their mum. They are 16 and 14 now and stay with me every second weekend but I feel that I'm a huge leap better at golf now than I ever was.

Having this time, the right mindset and the support behind you is utterly crucial I think. My current (now fiance) loves watching Golf on tv and comes out with me sometimes on a 9 hole walk. It's made a massive difference and sometimes my girls ask to go to the driving range with me. It's more than likely to watch young fit boys playing.

no one can make the decision for you, but it worked out ok for me.

 

[Lord Tyrion]

Golf is meant to be fun. If you are not having fun then take a break. Golf will still be around when your kids are a little older. It will not disappear.

I started playing a few years ago and my kids were still young. I did not have time to practice, still don't as I am still a taxi service for them, so my expectations are low in h/c terms. I play for fun and the social aspect. When they get older and move on to university etc I will have time to try to reduce my handicap and really improve my play. Until then I accept my limitations and just look to enjoy myself. Maybe you just need to do the same for a while.

 

[garyinderry]

Instead of playing every week. Take the odd week off playing and go to the practice ground for four hours.

You will either improve your game or be so bored you can't wait till your next game that you won't care about the score.

Good luck.

 

[la_lucha]

When I was 28 I gave up golf because I couldn't find the time for the practice. It was always just round after round and the Mrs phoning me on the 12th asking if I was finished yet. I had two young girls too so I just chucked it. Sold everything and thought I wouldn't ever go back to it. I'm 38 now, divorced and my girls live with their mum. They are 16 and 14 now and stay with me every second weekend but I feel that I'm a huge leap better at golf now than I ever was.

Having this time, the right mindset and the support behind you is utterly crucial I think. My current (now fiance) loves watching Golf on tv and comes out with me sometimes on a 9 hole walk. It's made a massive difference and sometimes my girls ask to go to the driving range with me. It's more than likely to watch young fit boys playing.

no one can make the decision for you, but it worked out ok for me.

I think your actions sum up the way I'm feeling (without the selling everything part, I fully intend to get back into it when I can take the kids).

Membership is one hell of a financial commitment. It's costing me around £24 per round at the moment. I can take guests on for less than that.

 

[Rooter]

I'm in a similar position, I have played once in the last 2 months i think. During those months i have not really had the "bug" to make an effort to free up some time, I have given up trying to reduce my handicap, just going to play as and when i can, Going to make an effort to play every other tuesday in the weekly stableford for the rest of the summer. Weekends are a right off for me, so just going to play when the opportunity arises.

Still enjoy the range and the short game area, so will just be a very part time hobby for the coming years! Still love the game though, so not giving up! Just realising i dont have much time.

 

[Paul77]

I think at this point there's not really a positive recovery for you if you're implementing a financial aspect to the mix. I stoppped because I couldn't afford £800 joining fee and £1400 a year. I came to that point and decided it wasn't for me. If you're feeling that you aren't improving in the time you have, but are putting out all this money on golf for no return, knowing you can't put in anymore time or money then I'm afraid it's either a rest or a new outlook.

Golf is in the head, and when you're head if full of things putting you off your golf, it slowly becomes a chore. Support disappears too and then you start to get niggling voice in your head.

The other day I shot +6 for 12 holes. The week before I shot a 79 on a par 70. I'm not worried about how much golf is costing me in time, money or otherwise and I do sincerely believe this is the reason I'm loving it. If I was in the same situation as I was before I wouldn't have picked up the sticks again. Too much mental torture on tees for it to be worth the hassle.

Just my experience of course.

 

[BoadieBroadus]

i'm in the same boat, my second was born in October, i was overly optimistic about chances to play, but won't be able to justify membership once renewal time comes around.

one of the appeals of golf was the competition - not necessarily against others, but against the handicap - without any time to practice (or even play) that appeal has gone.

i still enjoy the range a couple of times a week, but I have conceded that that is going to be it for the next few years until the older child can play as well. slowly offloading extra clubs etc. sad to admit it, but I'm more or less donw with actually playing for a while...

 

[la_lucha]

I think at this point there's not really a positive recovery for you if you're implementing a financial aspect to the mix. I stoppped because I couldn't afford £800 joining fee and £1400 a year. I came to that point and decided it wasn't for me. If you're feeling that you aren't improving in the time you have, but are putting out all this money on golf for no return, knowing you can't put in anymore time or money then I'm afraid it's either a rest or a new outlook.

Golf is in the head, and when you're head if full of things putting you off your golf, it slowly becomes a chore. Support disappears too and then you start to get niggling voice in your head.

The other day I shot +6 for 12 holes. The week before I shot a 79 on a par 70. I'm not worried about how much golf is costing me in time, money or otherwise and I do sincerely believe this is the reason I'm loving it. If I was in the same situation as I was before I wouldn't have picked up the sticks again. Too much mental torture on tees for it to be worth the hassle.

Just my experience of course.

Sums up my current feelings perfectly though.

 

[morgs]

I felt the same a couple of years ago. Playing badly, throwing mini tantrums ( I know, very sad ).Took a year off and joined a gym instead. Played the occasional game and started to realise what I'd been missing. Rejoined a club this year and reminded myself it's only a game and am playing and enjoying it so much more.

 

[TheCaddie]

It's all about what is important to you and your life. For me, I work in an office from 7.30am until about 6/6.30pm every day, so making sure I am outdoors of a weekend is really important. I am new to the game, and just love trying to get better. Practice is really hard for me too. I do one range session of a week, and then play once a week (most of the time but not always).

I also play with my partner which has been critical for us, and we both really like getting out there and playing.

It sounds like you know how to play the game pretty well and it may even be a concentration issue when you're out there. I may be a million miles off, but I would hazard a guess you aren't too far from being really good, so why quit now?

 

[la_lucha]

I may be a million miles off, but I would hazard a guess you aren't too far from being really good, so why quit now?

Because I'm not able to play to my potential due to lack of practice time. Standing in the middle of a fairway 250+ from the tee and pulling a wedge out of bounds kind of puts a dampner on things. It just gets kinda tedious.

 

[Paul77]

You know what you need to do to get off that platform to the next level, but your time or commitments just won't allow it. Vicious circle really.

My advice? If you can afford to play, just play for kicks and giggles. If you can't afford to play then it's likely it's a financial drain meaning it's getting to you. If you're standing on that tee box and instead of visualising the shot, you're wondering how you're going to do the weekly shop this week, I'm afraid it's never going to help get that ball on the short stuff.

 

[full_throttle]

play golf for the enjoyment, the handicap will take care of itself. If your worried about the financial outlay then either join a cheaper golf club or become a nomad, there are plenty on here from the midlands if you want a game

 

[duncan mackie]

For 99% of players golf is a pastime, hobby, maybe sport and should be prioritised in that way.
Whether it's financial, time or effort and energy that are the limiting factors doesn't matter - the underlying equation is the same.

It could be a whole lot worse all round; I've known people try to balance drugs, booze, women, fast cars and golf with marriage and kids. ..

 

[HomerJSimpson]

I don't have kids but I know from my experiences growing up and my dad working long hours seven days a week, he regretted not seeing me grow up as much as he could. I'd say take time out and enjoy the family time now and go back especially if you aren't really enjoying it

 

[the smiling assassin]

If you've ever walked off the course during a medal for 'golfing' reasons then you should quit, probably for good. If not, then you should keep it up, just play less, adjust your expectations, and enjoy the extra time you get with your kids.
I feel it's vital to get a little 'me' time on the course. Balance. Playing much less than I used too, but still play ok from time to time.

 

[Craigg]

Gave up for around 15 years. Nearly cost me my marriage and sanity trying to improve. I was on the course every day that went by. Woke up one day and decided enough was enough. I played the odd round in my 15 year sabbatical, and I must say, my lowest ever score of 85 came on one of those days. No pressure, just along for a laugh with the lads and hey presto, there it was. It never tempted me back though.
My return to golf was by means of a malignant melanoma in my right eye necessitating the removal of the eye in 2012. That was the end of my newly found love of cricket. I no longer had any depth perception so couldn't judge a moving ball.
I saw my clubs in the corner of the shed one afternoon and decided to give it a go. Not expecting any miracles, I did however realise that I could hit a static ball ok.
I am now back on the course every day and loving it, (I have a fantastic wife!) but without the pressure I used to put on myself, as I now know there really are more important things than a number in a box on a piece of cardboard....And when I'm playing really awful, hey I just blame the eye!

My advice is keep up your membership, but enjoy it for what it is, fun.