What is the daftest sign / notice you've ever seen at a golf club?

[Doon frae Troon]

I went into one cloakroom ( I can't remember where ) and the sign read;

Our aim is to keep these toilets clean, your aim helps.

I thought they were taking the p...

If you sprinkle while you tinkle
Be a sweet and keep it neat

 

[Green Bay Hacker]

'Massage in the old pro shop'

Next time I'm over there I will get a pic to post.

 

[Hovisbap]

Ouch !!!

 

[Khamelion]

Can't remember where I saw it but...

"Trespassers will be shot, survivors will be shot again"

 

[mchacker]

Hopeman golf club, 5th tee; "Please do not play to the green"


Unfortunately this refers to tee shots as it is a short 90 degree dogleg

 

[hovis]

On the tee " no practice swings"

 

[North Mimms]

On the tee " no practice swings"

THIS should be in the Rule book!

 

[Crow]

Or this one in France... as if any of us have that much control over it...
View attachment 9768

Just having that sign there will mean that the number of balls leaked right will double as players try not to hit them right.

 

[john0]

Women and Seniors welcome..........

 

[shivas irons]

Muni in the states " NO SKATEBOARDING" apparently kids were skateboarding down the cart paths, sounds like fun!.

 

[Deleted member 15717]

Last year at my place, there ws a sign up saying:

"Beware,
Adder's spotted on the course"

to which someone had made some slight changes to:

"Beware,
BlackAdder's spotted on the course"

which then had "what about Baldrick" added soon after.

The sign didn't last too much longer after that

 

[Foxholer]

Signs that get up my nose the most are the ones that say 'Next Tee --->' but are positioned such that the only way you can see them is if you are on the way to the (correct) tee! The one to Laleham's 11th is a classic - halfway there, past the other possible candidate (the 16th).

How about this one!

Not on a Golf course presumably! Though it could apply to some!

 

[Sid Rixon IV]

In a clubhouse I visited Sunday:
Behind the bar was a list of "spot"fines hand written on a chalk board.
Some were the normal transgressions about dress code but in amongst them were,
"Using a mobile phone in the clubhouse - £5"
"Telling lies on the phone - £50"

 

[bobmac]

 

[TheClaw]

Warning this sign has sharp edges.

 

[shivas irons]

Ha ha love it!

 

[bernix]

"ZEBRA DROPPINGS IN THE BUNKERS ARE CONSIDERED LOOSE IMPEDIMENT AND MAY BE REMOVED"
Umhlali GC

 

[Doon frae Troon]

Not golf but on the pathway through Salisbury Plain [used once a year for the Neolithic marathon] there are signs every couple of miles that say.

'Do not stray from this path or you may be killed'

 

[malek988]

"if fore is shouted, take evasive action" Spa GC

aye aye Mavrick

 

[EdHendo]

"if fore is shouted, take evasive action" Spa GC

aye aye Mavrick

Brilliant