Poor!

[AuburnWarrior]

Off the seventh tee, Joe sliced his shot deep into a wooded ravine. He took his eight iron and clambered down the embankment in search of his lost ball.
After many long minutes of hacking at the underbrush, he spotted something glistening in the leaves. As he drew nearer, he discovered that it was an eight iron in the hands of a skeleton!
Joe immediately called out to his friend, "Jack, I've got trouble down here!"
"What's the matter?" Jack asked from the edge of the ravine.
"Bring me my wedge," Joe shouted. "You can't get out of here with an eight iron!"

I'm here all week.....

 

[USER1999]

NOOOOOO!

 

[ADB]

...............tumbleweed.................

 

[Smiffy]

There are bad jokes, and there are terrible jokes.
That joke was worse.

 

[AuburnWarrior]

So my career as a stand up comedian should be put on hold then.....

 

[Region3]

Are multiple usernames allowed?

Have drawboy and AuburnWarrior ever been seen together in the same room?

 

[Smiffy]

So my career as a stand up comedian should be put on hold then.....

Yep.
With superglue

 

[drawboy]

Oi! mine aren't that bad.

 

[drawboy]

Strangely enough I was once working in an old stately home that was derelict. I was asked to go into the roof space to check the pipework. I clambered up and rummaged around for a bit and found a skeleton dressed in top hat and tails with a medallion around its neck. I looked at the medallion blew off the dust and it read...Irish hide 'n' seek champion 1847

 

[AuburnWarrior]

I win!

 

[nowtfancy]

A skeleton walked into a pub and asked for a pint of lager................

and a mop.



soz

 

[drawboy]

Whilst out for a drink today a man came into the pub and asked for half a lager in a pint glass topped up with soda water a dash of lime, umbrella and a cherry on a stick. The barman said that's a strange drink mate. The other bloke said you would be drinking this if you had what I've got! the barman looked rather uncomfortable and asked What have you got? the customer replied 60p
Am I the King or what?

 

[Region3]

My mate sent me a text today that just said....

N
B
A
G

... I think it's bang out of order!

 

[iwtuk]

A man walked into the Doctors with a lettuce leaf poking out of his arse.

"Goodness me" said the Doctor "that looks painful."

"It is" replied the man "but it's only the tip of the iceberg."

 

[bobmac]

A guy walks into the doctor and says "I think I'm a dog".
Lie on the couch says the doctor.
"I'm not allowed on the furniture" came the man's reply.

 

[Screwback]

two snakes crawling through the grass one says hey dave are we the type of snakes that kill by biting or do we crush'em.

dave says we crush'em

the other says thank god for that ive just bit me lip

 

[madandra]

I was driving past the cemetery today and there were 4 guys carrying a coffin. On my way home from work they were still walking round the cemetery with the coffin ....


I think they've lost the &*%$&@ PLOT !!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Smiffy]

Bloke goes to the docs, says "I've got an embarrassing problem Doc. Every time I take a step, I fart"
"Show me what you mean" says the Doctor.
So the guy walks around the surgery going pfft, pfft, pfft.
The doctor leaves the room and comes back with a big wooden pole with a hook on the end.
"You're not going to stick that up my arse are you?" asks the patient.
"No, I'm going to open a window. If fecking stinks in here" replies the doc.

 

[Eejit]

Dear Grim Reaper, this year so far you have taken my favourite Actor/Dancer Patrick Swayze, my favourite singers Michael Jackson & Stephen Gately, and my favourite Chef Keith Floyd, i would just like to let you know that i love Christiano Ronaldo. ;0)

 

[Smiffy]

Strangely enough I was once working in an old stately home that was derelict. I was asked to go into the roof space to check the pipework. I clambered up and rummaged around for a bit and found a skeleton dressed in top hat and tails with a medallion around its neck. I looked at the medallion blew off the dust and it read...Irish hide 'n' seek champion 1847

If they couldn't find him, how did they award him with the medallion?
I've been wondering this for the last four nights