Imurg
The Grinder Of Pars (Semi Crocked)
Almost saw a Vampire on my early morning walk..
Laughter - the best medicine
- Thread starter YandaB
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GreiginFife
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Mudball
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Clarkson could not have written it better ..
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CliveW
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An elderly man living alone in London wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, since the ground was hard. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:
Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Dad x
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Dad,
Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.
Love,
Vinnie
At 4 a.m. the next morning, the murder squad and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Dad,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you x
Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad, because it looks like I won’t be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I’m just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over.. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love, Dad x
A few days later he received a letter from his son.
Dear Dad,
Don’t dig up that garden. That’s where the bodies are buried.
Love,
Vinnie
At 4 a.m. the next morning, the murder squad and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.
Dear Dad,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That’s the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you x
venger
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venger
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Pants
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Probably been done before ...
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Imurg
The Grinder Of Pars (Semi Crocked)
Imurg
The Grinder Of Pars (Semi Crocked)
venger
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Slime
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Imurg
The Grinder Of Pars (Semi Crocked)
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During a U2 concert in Glasgow, Scotland, Bono asked the audience for total quiet.
Then in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands. Once every few seconds. Holding the audience in total silence, he said into the microphone "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies."
From the front of the crowd, a broad Scottish accent pierced the quiet: "Well f#ckin' stop doin' it then ya evil b#stard!"
Then in the silence, he started to slowly clap his hands. Once every few seconds. Holding the audience in total silence, he said into the microphone "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies."
From the front of the crowd, a broad Scottish accent pierced the quiet: "Well f#ckin' stop doin' it then ya evil b#stard!"
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ColchesterFC
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Driving through a village today I saw a sign that said "Free Range Eggs". I'd never heard of Range Eggs before but as they were free I took a dozen.
