Laughter - the best medicine

ColchesterFC

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I sent my mate a Bon Jovi album for Xmas but it's not been delivered yet. Every time I check the tracking info it just says, "Oh, it's halfway there".
 

ColchesterFC

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Mick Jagger and Keith Richards came round for Xmas dinner a couple of years ago. Unfortunately I undercooked the turkey and gave them really bad food poisoning. It was touch and go for a while but they both pulled through. I almost managed to kill two Stones with one bird.
 

fundy

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I just saw a shoplifter stealing a turkey from Tesco and running out the store being chased by security... I yelled at him “What are you doing with that?!!” He shouted back “potatoes, sprouts and pigs in blankets!!”
 
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