Becoming a parent / impact on your golf

[Backsticks]

It was well explored in one of Newtons remarkably prescient, but less famous papers, which, using his previously derived Universal Golf Constant of 0.95 concluded :

HIafterkids = HIbeforekids X δy/δx(ʎ0.95)^k

For which there are no known solutions not leading to a decrease in HI.

k=number of kids
HI = Handicap Index
ʎ = personal slow play factor

 

[Daff]

My two are 11 and 13 and are both now into golf and are really good golfers, but I gave up golf when they were both born and didn't play for about 8 years. I was playing well at the time and was playing to a 6 cap and dropping, but it just didn't feel fair to me to swan off for 4 hours of golf a couple of times a week and practice to maintain the standard that I was playing to.
That's now changed and the kids enjoy a round of golf with me whilst the wife has a bit of a break. I'm not as competitive as I was and am playing off 7.7 so not too bad but as long as my family is happy and settled, then that's good enough for me

 

[Banchory Buddha]

It didn't change for me at all, I was a shift worker when kids were little, so still got out more or less as before, but for a couple of my mates who have had late in life family, their golf time has been decimated, both on the once a week schedule now. They'd not put their kids back but I know I'd rather be me now with grankids scuttling about, than having primary/secondary school age kids of my own in my 50s.

 

[SyR]

The other thing I forgot to mention is that having kids in my late 30's definitely has definitely an impact on my body.
The amount of times I've pulled a muscle in my back, neck or arm due to my daughter throwing her weight around while I've been holding her.
Also I have become a human mule due to the amount of stuff we need to bring when we travel anywhere with them.
I managed to pull a muscle in my wrist a few day before H4H last month by carrying the double pushchair up some stairs as the lift was out.

 

[Bdill93]

I've been a dad for 10 months and all I would say is its about balance.

I have still played plenty, often get out early at weekends to try and get back - the real thing is you do want to spend time with your kid after being away at work all week. I didn't really think Id be like that but I am!

My golf has probably actually improved too, I don't care as much and have more fun on the course - its my me time and I just relax, better golf has come as a result.

When the summer rolls around again and midweek evening golf becomes an option you get a bit of added freedom!

 

[Anoetic]

Playing on a course, yes, practicing no….I started taking mine to a driving range when they were 2 months old…

 

[Depreston]

Have a 8 month old baby here.

Played pretty much every Saturday comp through the summer and got out once an evening during the summer. I was on night feed duty that night and got up with him on Sunday morning so she could have a lie in. Also looked after the lad solo two nights a week so she could do something she wanted to do.

Was usually back by midday on the Saturday so wasn't too much of a problem i also had a 3 night golf trip in September. Think she regretted Ok'ing that one mind

went from 7.1 to 9.4 and didn't break my handicap once still loved every minute out on the course and struck the ball decently but being in the depths of sleep deprived nights i made loads of stupid mistakes.

I haven't picked up a club since the clocks went back and will be range simulator sessions throughout the winter months i've always found winter golf a chore tbh.

I'll be doing the above next spring and summer as well.

I also work from home 2 days a week so had plenty of time with him think if i was out 5 days a week i might have played less Saturdays though.

 

[need_my_wedge]

When I remarried, my wife was new to the country. I gave up Golf completely as it was unfair on her to be out at weekends when she didn’t really know anyone. We had a son after about 3 years and it wasn’t until he was about 8 and could come out with me that I started playing again. I stopped playing for almost 11 years.

Started again about 14 years ago, now at my lowest handicap ever and my son is a PGA professional. My wife is now an avid golfer too….. Every cloud……

 

[Fromtherough]

When they’re first born you might find you actually don’t want to play as much. Although, that doesn’t last that long! Having an understanding partner helps (as well as playing the game for their interests). But you may have to compromise on practicing AND playing as much as you do now.

As they get older you’ll likely find their interests will take up a lot of your time too. My daughter does gymnastics, dancing and football so has something on 6 days out of 7. So my golf tends to fit around her training and competitions. I tend to play early on a weekend, meaning I’m usually back to take her to her activity. In the summer on an evening I can get 8-10 holes in between dropping her and picking her up. However if there’s a competition or tournament then there will be no golf on that day/weekend.

 

[HeftyHacker]

I had my first in the summer of 2021 (so 18 months old now).

A big drop-off in the very early days but over time got it to about twice a week this summer - an evening round and flying round when it was quiet on a weekend morning or evening. I also fonish work at lunchtime on Fridays and have a few hours to myself whilst my parents have the littlun.

I have a very understanding missus though and she sees the benefits it has for me mentally. It also helps that both sets of grandparents live within 25 mins and are more than happy to have her for a few hours.

We've another due in Feb though so I suspect that it'll become really tight then. Not sure whether to renew my membership next year or go to a PMG membership more locally. I'd like to keep my handicap active ideally so I can play in an open every now and again but we'll see.

 

[Bdill93]

When I remarried, my wife was new to the country. I gave up Golf completely as it was unfair on her to be out at weekends when she didn’t really know anyone. We had a son after about 3 years and it wasn’t until he was about 8 and could come out with me that I started playing again. I stopped playing for almost 11 years.

Started again about 14 years ago, now at my lowest handicap ever and my son is a PGA professional. Every cloud……

How did you get him interested in golf?

 

[chico]

The other thing I forgot to mention is that having kids in my late 30's definitely has definitely an impact on my body.
The amount of times I've pulled a muscle in my back, neck or arm due to my daughter throwing her weight around while I've been holding her.
Also I have become a human mule due to the amount of stuff we need to bring when we travel anywhere with them.
I managed to pull a muscle in my wrist a few day before H4H last month by carrying the double pushchair up some stairs as the lift was out.

I had two when in my 40's and feel I have aged 2 years for every one they have.

 

[need_my_wedge]

How did you get him interested in golf?

I bought him a pitching wedge and a putter (about £5 each from sports direct at the time). Just took him out with me for 9 holes later on the weekends when few people on the course. Once we were about 50 yards out, let him play into the green and putt out. He started liking it and got better very quickly. Then put him in the club junior group sessions, was £1 a time back then. He got better again, then when he was about 12 I think, bought him a set of junior clubs, joined him into the club and let him loose. The rest as they say....

 

[Bdill93]

I bought him a pitching wedge and a putter (about £5 each from sports direct at the time). Just took him out with me for 9 holes later on the weekends when few people on the course. Once we were about 50 yards out, let him play into the green and putt out. He started liking it and got better very quickly. Then put him in the club junior group sessions, was £1 a time back then. He got better again, then when he was about 12 I think, bought him a set of junior clubs, joined him into the club and let him loose. The rest as they say....

Nice gentle introduction then! I like it! Hope my lad grows up to love the game too - no aspirations of him going pro but certainly would like him to enjoy golf!

 

[SurreyGolfer]

I've got 3, 4yrs 2yrs and 8months. It's a slightly different take from me given that I played when a teenager and gave up, but then picked the sticks back up when I already had 2 kids. This did present issues as Golf was seen as another thing to add to the list, rather than a pre-existing hobby that pre-dated kids.

I've been fortunate this year that work has been manageable, this has allowed me to have a few driving range lunchtimes, and over the summer months I've been able to get 9 holes in after the kids go to bed.

I pretty much avoid playing at peak times, particularly as my course is usually back-to-back for all of Saturday, I'm looking at 4.5-5hrs and I just don't feel that's fair at the moment for me to be away for so long. On the rare occasions I play 18, it'll be when my wife has help with the kids and I'll make sure I'm first one on the tee so I can get back in 3-3.5hrs including travel time.

Want to get the 4 year old into it but he doesnt like listening at the minute and a little worried I'll take him too early and he'll not enjoy it.

 

[jamielaing]

We had our first child at the end of April. I've had to compromise on a few things but I was clear from before he was born that golf was important to me for a number of reasons. I have been trying to get myself to a decent standard for a couple of years and was right on the cusp of where I want to get to.

I said to the Missus that I would give up everything but golf and we agreed to twice a week generally. It's limited practice and means I'm often not getting bounce rounds but just medals. I've changed times from mid day to early morning so there is time after golf for the wee man.

Next season will be more of a struggle as I am moving to condensed hours for childcare so midweek will be more of a challenge.

On the flip side I enjoy golf more now that I don't practice constantly and I've improved because mentally I don't go in such a huff when things aren't going to plan. Handicap has gone from 5 to 2.8.

The missus does sometimes point out I am pushing my luck of course. And that she reckons I am the only guy to ever chop his handicap the year he has a child.

 

[HowlingGale]

I'll be honest, it decimated my leisure time (and social life). I guess it was the guilt of landing all the work on the wife.
After the arrival of the second I had to give up membership. We both work full time so there was always loads needing done.
During that time I played nomadic golf. Maybe it was once a month or so during the summer and a couple of times during the winter.
Did this until the August of the COVID 2020 and bit the bullet and joined a club.
I had got the boy into golf gradually since age 2. Plastic set, small putter, PW etc. Took him to munis etc. He's now 10 and a member at the club and attends the group coaching there. We sometimes go out on Sundays if he's nothing else on.
My daughter is 8 and she's at the coaching. She's not quite there yet for the big course at the moment.
My plan is to get them to a standard where I can take them on golfing holidays. Very long term but nothing ever happens fast where kids are concerned. Other than the parents ageing. ?

 

[OnTour]

ZERO impact always been a keen sport person all my life, so my wife totally understood that no change would continue. all I say is after 12 months I gave up work for 4 years to look after my lad before he started reception then got a part time job to fit round that so I did my PART

he's 10 this year and I take him and collect him from school 4 days a week, I get Friday afternoon off for good behavior.

Life is easy when you work together and respect each other and the hobbies we have

oh 6k miles on a bike the first year along with a full cricket season (long piece of string)

 

[Backache]

I was living and working abroad and couldn't really play golf when the kids were born.
Didn't stop me playing when I returned home after a few years though it probably meant it was less frequent than it otherwise would have been.

 

[TigerBear]

Really good and interesting points on this thread. Thanks guys.

Our first is due July and was thinking of canceling my membership but thankfully the good lady has agreed that would be jumping the gun. Yes, I'm a very lucky man