...always stop to smell the flowers

IanM

Journeyman Pro
Joined
May 18, 2009
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14,703
Location
Monmouthshire, UK via Guildford!
www.newportgolfclub.org.uk
I've just had call from a former colleague. She and her husband never wanted children, had great jobs and maxed out on their AVCs so they could both retire at 50. This they did, 4 years ago. They travelled, explored and enjoyed life.

The call was to say that her husband died suddenly a couple of days ago. Fit and healthy, cyclist , not an ounce of fat on him, never smoked, liked the odd drink without it being too much. Dead, without warning. Not sure of the cause as yet.

So old chums, that's what can happen. Go home and kiss your "other halves, your kids, your dog or even your putter!" We are only here for a visit, too short a visit. If St Georges want £150 to play, and you have it, play it. If your budget is less but it gets you on West Hill, play it. (etc etc) Don't put off that trip to St Andrews or The Masters... go. (or whatever is your thing)

What a terrible thing to happen, can't imagine how she feels....


Puts all the other stuff into perspective
 
Sorry for your loss, condolences to his family and friends.

You’re correct, life is too short and sadly none of us are promised tomorrow.
 
I used to work in Life Insurance.

I dealt with far too many death claims for people that were too young to die and too many that left work and died. It is what set my aims for my life.
 
Shocking news! The enormity of it must be overwhelming for her. So very sad.

Life isn't a rehearsal and tomorrow is never a given. Life is for living, go out and live it to the full.
 
I see the fragility of life every day in work so it has given me a new perspective. Also don't forget we as a forum community lost our very own RickG in similar circumstances to the person in the OP, all very sudden. So sad to hear/see people going way too early and shocking devastation it leaves behind
 
Two close friends of mine died within a couple of weeks of each other. One was 57, the other had just turned 50. That really gave me a wake up call. I was debt free and pretty comfortable and suddenly realised there was no point working until I was in my mid-60s. I decided to get out and enjoy life while I was still relatively young and healthy.

I had to call in a lot of favours and it took me a good 6 months to get everything in place, but I eventually left work with a decent payoff a couple of weeks after my 54th birthday. That was 4 years ago, and I know it's a cliche, but it's honestly the best thing I've ever done. I had a very high-pressure stressful job before, now I am totally chilled. I play golf 3 or 4 times a week, go to the gym a couple of times, odd game of snooker and plenty dog walking, I absolutely love my life now.
 
I had to call in a lot of favours and it took me a good 6 months to get everything in place, but I eventually left work with a decent payoff a couple of weeks after my 54th birthday. That was 4 years ago, and I know it's a cliche, but it's honestly the best thing I've ever done. I had a very high-pressure stressful job before, now I am totally chilled. I play golf 3 or 4 times a week, go to the gym a couple of times, odd game of snooker and plenty dog walking, I absolutely love my life now.

That is fantastic, sure many envy you. However, life has to go on and for the vast majority, they have to get out there and work but I also try and enjoy my life as much as possible, work less play more but bills still need paying and food still needs to be on the table, so everything is a balance.
 
Over the years, I have seen far to many friends and clients who I act for, play golf or friends, die at an early age for different reasons. Certain deaths have really changed my path in life. The first one was at quite a young age when my wife lost her dad, and I implemented a change which was bad, in the end I was just working far to hard in an attempt to 'take it easy/retire' in old age, which with hindsight I would never had gone down that path and it wasted 10-15 years of my life just working every hour of the week.

The other changes that have come about, like moving away from the south east to the midlands, slowing down the business, playing more golf, spending more time with the family, travelling a bit more around the UK, giving to charities etc, have all been for the better.

Life really is to short with no guarantees.

Sorry to hear about your friend Ian and it must be hard for his wife.:cry:
 
Lost two friends very quickly after getting diagnosed with Cancer, one last year and one this year, I’m literally talking 12 weeks for one and 8 weeks for the other since diagnosis, both mid thirties, one with a 3 year old and one year old and the other with an 8 year old.
No one knows what’s round the corner.....
 
That is fantastic, sure many envy you. However, life has to go on and for the vast majority, they have to get out there and work but I also try and enjoy my life as much as possible, work less play more but bills still need paying and food still needs to be on the table, so everything is a balance.

Totally agree that if you have to go to work, then trying to get a decent work/life balance in place is key.

But there are a fair amount of folk out there, particularly in their 50s, who are debt free, kids flown the nest, plenty money in the bank, but still working their arse off, not seeing enough of their family and friends, who could pack in tomorrow and have a comfortable life. This is particularly true of those with a lot of years in a decent pension scheme e.g. civil service or large corporations.

I've taken a hit income-wise, my pension pot is 35-40% less than it would have been if I worked to 65, but I can get by quite happily, and I'm far from unique.
 
I lost a cousin last year I grew up with,we were inseparable from tots till about 20 yrs old when life, work etc drew us apart.Got a call from my Mum that really hit me .47 yrs old,fit, beautiful wife and family, successful business,you name it.. Been to gym, showered and lied down saying he didn't feel right....just didn't wake up, absolutely awful watching his two school age kids following the coffin.Op is right, life is for living and we have much to live for.I'll probably potter about working for myself for a good few years yet but definitely try to take time to enjoy things more that otherwise you are easily convinced you are "too busy" for...
 
I lost 3 of my friends when we were all in our early/mid 30's. Live everyday as if it's your last because one day you'll be right :cautious:
 
Always sad when people die especially young ones, i lost my 37 year old daughter in 2006 and I'll never get over it.
But i my age I've more departed friends than living ones, sadly dying is the only thing in life you have to do, no one gets out alive.:cry::cry:.
So, as others have said make the best of it, it's not a rehearsal.
 
Working in the medical centre for twenty odd years it fair to say I have seen the thin end of the wedge. Missis T even more so. Can remember when we were on holiday and Tashyboy ended up doing resus in me speedos and flip flops. He died. He looked as fit as anything for a guy in his 50's. In hit home how quickly things can dramatically change.
In essence the loss of life is a massive wake up call for some.
Bottom line as has been said " get things done". Leave this life full of memories and not dreams.
 
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