Weddings

[Neilds]

Not sure what point people are trying to make by saying they only spent £x or £y on their weddings. People are different and want different things from life, doesn't make them wrong of right because they spent a bit more than you on their wedding (if they can afford it).

 

[Oddsocks]

Good stuff... although i'm a wee bit disappointed you don't have a huge eastenders one hour xmas special style of drama for us but I suppose its for the best

This 100 times over, three pages of reading for a happy ending…. Rather disappointing.

On the flip I’m relieved for the OP, we got married two years ago and as we were both working we may have had different options, but we paid for everything ourselves other than the dress (her parents) and flowers (my parents).

We set a budget, I had a £5k buffer in my own account as I knew we’d go slightly over and we both set up a standing orders into our savings 2 years before the day. In her eyes she went 2k over budget, in my eyes we were £3k under.

Unfortunately I only had 60 followers on gram so wasn’t appealing to any potential influencer deals, but many commented that our wedding was best they had attended in years.

One thing was stead fast on was not having a free bar, when you attend wedding with the the amount of half drunk or no touched drinks winds me up. Wines on the tables (red/white/and fizz) with a complementary drink after the ceremony as our service was at 11am. After that the piss heads can sponsor their own hang over!

 

[RichA]

Not sure what point people are trying to make by saying they only spent £x or £y on their weddings. People are different and want different things from life, doesn't make them wrong of right because they spent a bit more than you on their wedding (if they can afford it).

The OP asked for opinions about paying for an expensive wedding on an internet forum mostly occupied by middle-aged male golfers.
I'm pretty sure he did so in good humour and knowing what to expect. He doesn't seem worried by any of the responses.

 

[chico]

Same amount plus Inflation. Remember you don’t get the same for your money especially the way Inflation is going just now.

 

[Slab]

This 100 times over, three pages of reading for a happy ending…. Rather disappointing.

On the flip I’m relieved for the OP, we got married two years ago and as we were both working we may have had different options, but we paid for everything ourselves other than the dress (her parents) and flowers (my parents).

We set a budget, I had a £5k buffer in my own account as I knew we’d go slightly over and we both set up a standing orders into our savings 2 years before the day. In her eyes she went 2k over budget, in my eyes we were £3k under.

Unfortunately I only had 60 followers on gram so wasn’t appealing to any potential influencer deals, but many commented that our wedding was best they had attended in years.

One thing was stead fast on was not having a free bar, when you attend wedding with the the amount of half drunk or no touched drinks winds me up. Wines on the tables (red/white/and fizz) with a complementary drink after the ceremony as our service was at 11am. After that the piss heads can sponsor their own hang over!

Yeah c'mon, I mean Cinderella, snow white, sleeping beauty... jings even Princess Leia, they all had a bit of strife to deal with before the nuptial budget was agreed!

 

[irip]

The OP asked for opinions about paying for an expensive wedding on an internet forum mostly occupied by middle-aged male golfers.
I'm pretty sure he did so in good humour and knowing what to expect. He doesn't seem worried by any of the responses.

The responses have been interesting but I have not been worried by any of them.
It’s funny you guys are willing to spend thousands on golf membership and entrance fees.
More still on the latest driver,putter or set of irons.
Yet your beloved girl wants a nice day to declare her love for the man she wants to spend her life with and all of a sudden it’s a waste of money .

 

[Arthur Wedge]

Not sure what point people are trying to make by saying they only spent £x or £y on their weddings. People are different and want different things from life, doesn't make them wrong of right because they spent a bit more than you on their wedding (if they can afford it).

Is it not just people giving varying opinions and potential options on the situation - there is no right answer just what works for each person

 

[RichA]

The responses have been interesting but I have not been worried by any of them.
It’s funny you guys are willing to spend thousands on golf membership and entrance fees.
More still on the latest driver,putter or set of irons.
Yet your beloved girl wants a nice day to declare her love for the man she wants to spend her life with and all of a sudden it’s a waste of money .

It's all a waste of money; golf and weddings.
But you can't take it with you.
If it gives some pleasure when you're still around to enjoy it then it's a worthwhile advance on the inheritance.

 

[Bunkermagnet]

I paid for our wedding, 39 yrs ago.
It was done on half a shoelace, because my future in laws didn't want her to get married so young/to me so wouldn't pay anything.
They said it wouldn't last. (It's 40 yrs next May)
Ive paid for both my daughters weddings, the eldest cam to about £15k, as his mother had nothing and his father died when he was 6.
The youngests has fine up until after the honeymoon ( that he paid for).
The fact his ( much more well off than us ) mother said it was the brides parents responsibility to pay for rhe wedding did irk us, but when she complained we weren't inviting every member of their huge and sone very distant family it was very satisfying to tell her if she didn't want to contribute to HER sons wedding then go forth with your complaints.
Even when she did eventually contribute it was too late to add any more as the location numbers were at max.
At the end of the day, it was a day for my daughter and seeing her so happy on that day is priceless.

 

[Doon frae Troon]

Nearly all of my family weddings have been small but classy affairs from 20 to 40 guests.
My grand daughters recent wedding followed this trend, 45 guests but 6 bridesmaids
Re money, you should treat both daughters the same regardless of situations.

PS Some of the most enjoyable weddings I have attended have been the village hall self catering types.

 

[D-S]

Over the years, like most on here, I've been to a wide variety of weddings. With the exception of one where a lot of money was spent (far beyond the reach of most), my memories are the cheaper and more cheerful the wedding, certainly as a guest, the better. Everything doesn't have to be perfect and there is no tension in the participants or guests. One example was a town hall ceremony followed by a BYO barn dance in the village hall, simple great fun - oddly far more memorable than doves, £000s for flowers etc. etc..

 

[Lucifer MorningStar]

Over the years, like most on here, I've been to a wide variety of weddings. With the exception of one where a lot of money was spent (far beyond the reach of most), my memories are the cheaper and more cheerful the wedding, certainly as a guest, the better. Everything doesn't have to be perfect and there is no tension in the participants or guests. One example was a town hall ceremony followed by a BYO barn dance in the village hall, simple great fun - oddly far more memorable than doves, £000s for flowers etc. etc..

You’ve just reminded of the worst and biggest waste of money over the top wedding I’ve ever been to

Mrs M was maid of honour a few years ago at her best mates wedding. The ultimate wannabe princess marrying the biggest wannabe baller you’ve ever known! The ceremony included 10 bridesmaids and 12 groomsman ! The reception was in the worlds biggest marquee in a farmers fields they’d hired out and the transport for the bride and groom from ceremony to reception was a I kid you not was a helicopter!

So imagine the scenes everyone is lined up in this field waiting for the arrival via helicopter, well everyone except for me and my wife. As my job involves a lot of direct work with Rotary aircraft , so I said to Mrs M we’ll wait in the car as I knew what was coming. The amount of people that were covered in flying dirt, hay and grass from the Downwash as the Heli landed was hilarious and they spent the rest of the day/night covered in it as a result and all the inside of the marquee was dust and dirt filled because of it and the pictures for the gram were ruined.

Not us though we were nice and clean.

It just went to show no matter how much money you spend or think you have you can’t buy class

 

[Slab]

Been to lots but none for years, but have a wedding to go to in a couple of months (mates daughter) it falls on the same day as an annual Open 36-hole comp played over 2 courses on one day
When I saw the clash I spoke to the bride-to-be directly and she won’t change the date! Advice?


On a serious note I’m obviously happy to go to the wedding so the post is tongue in cheek… although I did suggest she change it

 

[Oddsocks]

Been to lots but none for years, but have a wedding to go to in a couple of months (mates daughter) it falls on the same day as an annual Open 36-hole comp played over 2 courses on one day
When I saw the clash I spoke to the bride-to-be directly and she won’t change the date! Advice?


On a serious note I’m obviously happy to go to the wedding so the post is tongue in cheek… although I did suggest she change it

Don’t attend, advise her life is about compromise and it’s key to a successful marriage and a lesson she needs to learn…. and quick!

If she cant compromise and change the date you can’t compromise and attend.

 

[CliveW]

If I had a daughter then I wouldn't have any problems with financing her wedding. However, as I said in my earlier post, after the couple had been living together for seven years and have a child I think they are a bit late in asking the Bank of Mum and Dad to cough up for what sounds like a glorified party.
If they feel that after all that time they need to tie the knot, then they should either fund it themselves, elope or get married in a Registrar's Office.

 

[irip]

If I had a daughter then I wouldn't have any problems with financing her wedding. However, as I said in my earlier post, after the couple had been living together for seven years and have a child I think they are a bit late in asking the Bank of Mum and Dad to cough up for what sounds like a glorified party.
If they feel that after all that time they need to tie the knot, then they should either fund it themselves, elope or get married in a Registrar's Office.

The other daughter was with her fella 11 years before they got married.
To be fair they were looking at getting married when Covid kicked in and then they had the nipper and she didn’t want to get married with a football up her dress

 

[Doon frae Troon]

Hijacking this thread for Funeral travel advice please.

Can any lovely West Country folks tell me the easiest OAP route to travel between Southhampton Docks and Exeter.
Years since I have been down there and it looks like three routes with similar travel times.

 

[Lord Tyrion]

Hijacking this thread for Funeral travel advice please.

Can any lovely West Country folks tell me the easiest OAP route to travel between Southhampton Docks and Exeter.
Years since I have been down there and it looks like three routes with similar travel times.

I'm not from there but train has to be the best option. It's under 3 hours, depending on which train you catch.

Or will you be in a car?

 

[Doon frae Troon]

I'm not from there but train has to be the best option. It's under 3 hours, depending on which train you catch.

Or will you be in a car?

I am driving but probably taking a taxi from Exeter to Mary Tavy to scatter ashes.
Taxi is cheaper than the train believe it or not, and it can get us to where we want.
Returning to stay overnight in Exeter then back up to Scotland.

Too much driving, it would take an extra day and probably knacker me if I did it all.
Thanks for your input.

 

[CliveW]

Loganair fly from Edinburgh to Exeter so might be an option.