Andy
Tour Winner
You should be talking to your 3 kids and missus now instead of being on here if you want my opinion.
Ultimatum from GF.... not good tbh
- Thread starter G1BB0
- Start date
Scouser
Tour Winner
With a mug like that I am suprised hes got a GF :rofl:
Mark_G
Challenge Tour Pro
Blind date?
Scouser
Tour Winner
kev_off_the_tee
Journeyman Pro
I sat down with the missus and worked my golfing time out. I'm married and have a little girl and spend each evening with them and one weekend day. With the agreement comes trips to the my inlaws and extended family but its a small price to pay for me-time.
My time is limited to one round per week and one or two trips to the range (when I can be bothered to). I do play extra when I'm off work for a few days. I also get 2 hours on monday night for a game of footy.
As others have mentioned, your kids come first. How about bonding with them and trying to get them into golf? I love taking the little'n to the crazy golf and she always asks when will she be able to play 'daddy golf'
My time is limited to one round per week and one or two trips to the range (when I can be bothered to). I do play extra when I'm off work for a few days. I also get 2 hours on monday night for a game of footy.
As others have mentioned, your kids come first. How about bonding with them and trying to get them into golf? I love taking the little'n to the crazy golf and she always asks when will she be able to play 'daddy golf'
AmandaJR
Money List Winner
In her shoes I'd kinda like to be your respite from "life" and not golf. Not sure if you play Sat and Sun and if so then I'd say she has a case. Before I played golf David used to play once only over a weekend and then quite early so we only lost half the day.
In the end you have to decide what are your priorities and if they are your kids first (rightly) and golf second then she has a point...
philly169
Journeyman Pro
I used to play a lot of football at weekends, Saturday and Sunday.. At the time I'd been playing since I was 10' so 14 years I didn't want to miss a game. It started to really hamper my relationship as we could never do anything at weekends, ie shopping. When I packed in footy and started golf I'd go to the range during the week and only play comps, 2 a month sometimes 3, it still leaves a day to do stuff at weekends, plus the earlier I go out the earlier I get back..
I love golf but sometimes you have to give a little to get some back. Misses doesn't mind me playing golf now, I let her know when majors are so they are free and medals are once a month.. Good times.
I love golf but sometimes you have to give a little to get some back. Misses doesn't mind me playing golf now, I let her know when majors are so they are free and medals are once a month.. Good times.
Evesdad
Tour Winner
With having kids myself I have to limit my golf time. I play on one weekend day and prob a practice at the range mid week after about 1830 once the youngest is getting ready for bed. Then when the summer comes I play once mid week and once at the weekend or sometime play twice mid week and miss the weekend etc. this works most the time plus give and take some weeks may play an extra round some weeks may miss all together if have busy weekend etc. I'm at home full time so get loads more time with the kids but also have to make sure there are times put aside for the grown ups!!
If you think she is unreasonable then so be it but you really need to sit down and talk like adults about what each of you want out of the relationship and what room for manoeuvre there is. As said if your playing alot now you're going to struggle more in the nicer weather!!
Hope you can sort it out
If you think she is unreasonable then so be it but you really need to sit down and talk like adults about what each of you want out of the relationship and what room for manoeuvre there is. As said if your playing alot now you're going to struggle more in the nicer weather!!
Hope you can sort it out
Get her some golf lessons for Christmas, then you can still play & she can keep you company, job done?
Seriously though.
It's a difficult balance sometimes & golf is very time consuming.
You have to decide what your priorities are & how much your GF and / or golf mean to you?
I am sure a compromise can be reached somehow, remember it's your life as well.
It all depends on if you think she is being reasonable?
Seriously though.
It's a difficult balance sometimes & golf is very time consuming.
You have to decide what your priorities are & how much your GF and / or golf mean to you?
I am sure a compromise can be reached somehow, remember it's your life as well.
It all depends on if you think she is being reasonable?
G1BB0
Money List Winner
thanks to everyone, you all make sense, am off over to hers now as easier to tak face to face
I suppose it boils down to wanting the best of both worlds but everything takes time and effort. I will probably be only ever ok at golf so a weekend or round missed here and there wont make much difference in the long rung
love to you all xxx
I suppose it boils down to wanting the best of both worlds but everything takes time and effort. I will probably be only ever ok at golf so a weekend or round missed here and there wont make much difference in the long rung
love to you all xxx
As others have said kids come first. If she resents you for spending time with them then maybe you need to look at the whole thing. I can understand her wanting time with you as well but we all need our own space so its going to be time for a frank discussion. To be honest the simplest solution would be to cut down on winter golf and maybe hit the range for an hour giving you more time to spend with her or the kids while maintaining the swing. In the summer much more time to go out and play and everyone may be happy that way. Hope it goes well for you
Liverbirdie
Ryder Cup Winner
Maybe I'm just lucky. We've got no kids but mrs. Liverbirdie is great.
I play golf 3 times a week in summer, play squash once, footy once or twice.
Ive got a season ticket at Anfield, go to about 8-10 away games a season. Even followed the reds 3-4 times a season in Europe, when we were in it. Go on at least one golf trip a year and go away with work 4-5 times a year.
Her attitude at the end of the day, is as long as I go on 2-3 hols a year with her, 1-2 weekends away, days out etc, she is fine. She loves to see me enjoying my life, but as long as we do lots together as well, she is fine.
I've got some mates whose mrs hate them doing anything. Can't understand that dog-in-the-manger attitude!!!
I'm also fine with her doing what she wants.
I play golf 3 times a week in summer, play squash once, footy once or twice.
Ive got a season ticket at Anfield, go to about 8-10 away games a season. Even followed the reds 3-4 times a season in Europe, when we were in it. Go on at least one golf trip a year and go away with work 4-5 times a year.
Her attitude at the end of the day, is as long as I go on 2-3 hols a year with her, 1-2 weekends away, days out etc, she is fine. She loves to see me enjoying my life, but as long as we do lots together as well, she is fine.
I've got some mates whose mrs hate them doing anything. Can't understand that dog-in-the-manger attitude!!!
I'm also fine with her doing what she wants.
MizunoGreyhound
Challenge Tour Pro
Kids first G1bbo. Women and golf may come and go. Kids are irreplaceable and they wont want to know you soon enough.
Good luck matey.
Good luck matey.
Smiffy
Grand Slam Winner
All us men are given a piece of rope from our women.
It's knowing how far you can pull it before you hang yourself.
Mine has twanged a couple of times in the past, but I'm getting better at it.
It's knowing how far you can pull it before you hang yourself.
Mine has twanged a couple of times in the past, but I'm getting better at it.
JT77
Tour Winner
Gibbo, I have 3 kids too, 2 girls are at school, and the wee man is almost 2. As I work shifts, I play when the girls are at school, drop them off and then head to the course, back for just after lunch.
At the weekend, I play saturday, the girls dance on saturdays, then we have a family night, and sundays are family days, so no golf. Ulster cup is my only sunday golf, but that only takes up a few sundays a year as so far we have not made it past r2!
There is plenty of time for to fit everything in, I guess it is just planning how to do it, good luck though, I hope it all works out.
At the weekend, I play saturday, the girls dance on saturdays, then we have a family night, and sundays are family days, so no golf. Ulster cup is my only sunday golf, but that only takes up a few sundays a year as so far we have not made it past r2!
There is plenty of time for to fit everything in, I guess it is just planning how to do it, good luck though, I hope it all works out.
bladeplayer
Money List Winner
I think youve got bigger problems than your time for golf mate , she can resent your time at golf as much as she likes , having problems with you spending time with your kids is a whole different ball game , the 15 & 17 yr old surely will be needing less time as they are finding their own way , but along with this comes different problems & they will need their dads help & advice in many ways at different times , your doing the right thing going face to face to chat but as most says it will take compramise to make it work , sit dowm , make a list of pro's & cons of the relationship in a totaly honest way , the list will give you a clearer picture .. good luck with it ..
Smiffy
Grand Slam Winner
That's the one good thing about my Sam. She knew, when she met me, that I had two kids from my previous marriage. She never (ever) try's to interfere with my relationship with them. Ever. If she did, she'd be out. As much as I love her. My kids come before anything. OK they are a pain in the arse sometimes (read "most of the time") but nothing would ever stop me spending time with my kids. They are the most important thing in my life. And given the choice of quitting golf or my kids? Who wants to buy a set of clubs?
chrisd
Major Champion
Smiffy, is this a subtle way of getting rid of your clubs without having to post up a picture of them in the " For Sale " section
Chris
Oddsocks
Ryder Cup Winner
Obviously as others have said the biggest issue here is the kiddies, and only you can decide whats best for them. I wont comment on this side as i do not have kids myself so don't feel my opinion would be valid.
Re the golfing, its got to be about making a compromise. as suggested by someone else, one good way of earning brownie points is having a your day, a day where you just faff around with her and make he feel that you have made an effort. I don't live with HID, but no matter what every Wednesday is off limits, unless something very serious goes on Wednesday is her day, we take turns in cooking, watching films or what ever it is she wants to do on that night.
Tuesday night is "my time", i normally pop out and see the boys, maybe range for a lesson, or even go into homer mode, bum out on the sofa and watch tele, but Tuesday is set is stone as my day, it also gives her a night of the week where if she wants to see the girls, get or hair/nails done etc then its all good. I have a pass to play once a week, as she likes spending a day with me at the weekends too, and every few weeks i can normally wangle a 2 day pass.. so its not that bad,
Now whats hard is your trying to juggle a job, (whiich im assuming is 9-5 ish), then in the evening and weekends, juggle kids, GF and a hobby which if your trying to improve takes dedication.
"personally" in your shoes, if i could get a game once a week and a range session once a week id be stoked, enjoy the little ones growing up, and in about 5 years when the eldest is 18, they will be less dependent and your golfing time will increase. HID has made it quite clear that when we move in, because every day will be our day, i will be more than welcome to play golf both days at the weekend... but im sure its just a ploy to steel my freedom.
Re the golfing, its got to be about making a compromise. as suggested by someone else, one good way of earning brownie points is having a your day, a day where you just faff around with her and make he feel that you have made an effort. I don't live with HID, but no matter what every Wednesday is off limits, unless something very serious goes on Wednesday is her day, we take turns in cooking, watching films or what ever it is she wants to do on that night.
Tuesday night is "my time", i normally pop out and see the boys, maybe range for a lesson, or even go into homer mode, bum out on the sofa and watch tele, but Tuesday is set is stone as my day, it also gives her a night of the week where if she wants to see the girls, get or hair/nails done etc then its all good. I have a pass to play once a week, as she likes spending a day with me at the weekends too, and every few weeks i can normally wangle a 2 day pass.. so its not that bad,
Now whats hard is your trying to juggle a job, (whiich im assuming is 9-5 ish), then in the evening and weekends, juggle kids, GF and a hobby which if your trying to improve takes dedication.
"personally" in your shoes, if i could get a game once a week and a range session once a week id be stoked, enjoy the little ones growing up, and in about 5 years when the eldest is 18, they will be less dependent and your golfing time will increase. HID has made it quite clear that when we move in, because every day will be our day, i will be more than welcome to play golf both days at the weekend... but im sure its just a ploy to steel my freedom.
Smiffy
Grand Slam Winner
You suspicious git!!!! Might be
