Relief on the Course

Rooter said:
I am now lamenting a mouthful of coffee being sprayed over my laptop!!
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one of those jokes that is actually true. asked around to see if anyone had any paper hankies and i only had one sorry looking half snotty tissue. so monogrammed handkerchief it had to be.

and he mentions it every single time we play past that area of unfortunate woodland....
 
Spoke to Missis tash about this and it's all about you abusing your prostate through beer and fags. That explains why you don't see many women "squatting". Me, can't remember the las time I did not go during a round.

Have been known to " get it out" without any fluid disposal several times during a round when I havent driven me ball past the ladies tees, but I am not sure if that's a local ruling.
 
We have a convenient walk through from the 4th green to the 5th tee which is a popular stopping off point. I have never considered how often I have the need. Certainly not every round and can usually wait for nine holes at least when the course meanders back to the clubhouse where I can use the proper facilities
 
Tashyboy said:
Spoke to Missis tash about this and it's all about you abusing your prostate through beer and fags. That explains why you don't see many women "squatting". Me, can't remember the las time I did not go during a round.

Have been known to " get it out" without any fluid disposal several times during a round when I havent driven me ball past the ladies tees, but I am not sure if that's a local ruling.
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When I started playing golf again about 20 years ago at a less than upmarket 9-holer, my 4-ball saw the then Lady Captain in the group ahead "squatting" in a ditch. She was quite happy to laugh it off - can't imagine a Lady Captain doing the same these days.
 
As much as it's a laughing matter at times, when you have gotta go you have gotta go. As long as there's some amount of discretion in the matter I don't think it will upset to many people. Shouting Fore left and drawing attention to yourself whilst mid stream would probably be frowned upon somewhat.

in Mexico I played the Iberostar Cancun on my 50th and all was going well until the free bar turned up, the first beer never touched the sides. However Missis Tash said it is not possible to do it that many times in 14 holes.

would love to have a proper coffee before a game in the clubhouse but I would have to tow a porta loo behind the Buggy to get round.
 
JCW said:
And you wonder why you get digs at you , bad taste man , poor post ................me its the nearest bush , glove off of course ................EYG
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Are you stupid or trying to get a reaction? It was clear phil was joking even to a simpleton.

This thread was started for a bit of light hearted fun. Then you come long and clearly try to take it into the usual slagging match. Sadly there is too much of this going on recently and this forum needs less people like you
 
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My course has very few trees but loads of gorse bushes so you have to be very careful. It has been known for people to get a little prick in the backside when squatting down.

I just find the nearest point of relief then obviously take one club length relief for a number 1 and 2 club lengths for a number 2.
 
hovis said:
Are you stupid or trying to get a reaction? It was clear phil was joking even to a simpleton.

This thread was started for a bit of light hearted fun. Then you come long and clearly try to take it into the usual slagging match. Sadly there is too much of this going on recently and this forum needs less people like you
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And what do you call your post , its the type of post you dont like , you make me laugh , you need relief
 
hovis said:
Are you stupid or trying to get a reaction? It was clear phil was joking even to a simpleton.

This thread was started for a bit of light hearted fun. Then you come long and clearly try to take it into the usual slagging match. Sadly there is too much of this going on recently and this forum needs less people like you
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As the simpleton who started the thread I can confirm that it was obvious to me Phil was joking... I even did a little lol :smirk:
 
rosecott said:
I've always wondered why we men almost always have to do it by or up against a tree.
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Once got spotted watering a large oak as a youngster.
The tree was beside the tree on Kedleston's 16th hole, I went round the far side so as not to upset the young lady in our three-ball. Problem was the far side of the tree backed onto Kedleston Hall's driveway, which my parents were driving on at that very moment on their way out for a Sunday stroll.
Much piss-taking followed
 
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