Playing through... Was I in the wrong?

[jp5]

You did exactly the right thing - cut in front to continue your round without undue delay, but not too far in front so to let the group behind know they were being selfish.

The guy having a go at you was probably taking out his frustration of being an idiot.

 

[Hobbit]

Two wrongs don't make a right. But that said, I think they're over reacting to you holding them up for a few minutes compared to them holding you up for half your life time - slight over exaggeration maybe. I'd forget it if I was you...

 

[jimbob.someroo]

If that's the case and it is common knowledge, then a letter/s or even a petition should be presented to the President or/and General Manager as its situations and stories like this which discourages people from joining or revisiting clubs when a course gets a reputation due to the actions and attitudes of some of its members whilst on it!

Which in theory may be a good idea - but you know full well that an angry letter isn't going to do anything more than alienate you as a new member in a club.

Ours is the same as any other club in the land, there are old boys that play 7 days a week at the same time and don't like anybody anywhere near them. A letter won't make them change their ways, they've been doing the same thing for 40 years.

If there's a major issue like somebody's thrown a punch etc then sure, get the committee involved. But you can't report someone for having a cross word, as much as I'd personally like to.

I've huffed and puffed about about a few members over the last year or so, nothing overly serious, but I don't let them ruin my weekend anymore (either with slow play / etiquette). I pick a time that means I won't come across them, and if I'm playing a knock-about and catching them up - I'll either hang back and play a few balls, or skip a couple of holes ahead. No issue

 

[Fish]

Which in theory may be a good idea - but you know full well that an angry letter isn't going to do anything more than alienate you as a new member in a club.

Ours is the same as any other club in the land, there are old boys that play 7 days a week at the same time and don't like anybody anywhere near them. A letter won't make them change their ways, they've been doing the same thing for 40 years.

If there's a major issue like somebody's thrown a punch etc then sure, get the committee involved. But you can't report someone for having a cross word, as much as I'd personally like to.

I've huffed and puffed about about a few members over the last year or so, nothing overly serious, but I don't let them ruin my weekend anymore (either with slow play / etiquette). I pick a time that means I won't come across them, and if I'm playing a knock-about and catching them up - I'll either hang back and play a few balls, or skip a couple of holes ahead. No issue

Whilst I understand what your saying, that is simply allowing them to get away with it, which is wrong, and is why they brag about it, they think and believe they are untouchable!

It doesn't have to be an 'angry letter', just one that highlights the issues and attitudes being openly displayed and that it will cause members to leave and visitors to not return, I'm sure any GM wouldn't want that, unless you have a waiting list and are comfortably a cash-rich club?

 

[jimbob.someroo]

I'm sure any GM wouldn't want that, unless you have a waiting list and are comfortably a cash-rich club?

Definitely not! I'm not sure they even exist anymore!

Only playing Devil's Advocate, but the GM having words with a few old members could risk them leaving, having been there for 'x' years etc. Those sorts of members are the ones that I imagine most GM's want to keep happy. They play most days, always have tea and toast afterwords, and are often members of position (or ex-position) within a club.

IMO (and I'm happy to be wrong) is that writing a letter about them after one 'altercation' opens the door for far more aggro than it's worth. If it becomes a regular thing for the OP, then by all means, write away! But see how it goes for a few weeks at the club first!

 

[Fish]

but the GM having words with a few old members could risk them leaving, having been there for 'x' years etc. Those sorts of members are the ones that I imagine most GM's want to keep happy. They play most days, always have tea and toast afterwords, and are often members of position (or ex-position) within a club.

I really don't like this, but I know and understand that its an attitude (wrongly) taken at many clubs.

Those 'seniors' pay the same money each year and have no more rights than a new member and if anything, they should know better, but to allow them to 'rule the roost' irrelevant of past positions is simply wrong and if I was a GM in this situation and it meant a senior being ticked off for poor etiquette and ungentlemanly behaviour, and especially as they 'brag about doing it' as you've mentioned, and it led to them leaving, then good riddance I say!

Strong management and unpopular decisions have to be made at times for the better and long-term good of the club, even it that means upsetting some 'old school' faithfuls as its the new members who are the future of the club, not them!

 

[Deleted member 15344]

Think your attitude is spot on Robin and too many clubs are scared of the old membership

But it's hard to upset members who have built the club up - they may not be the future but they are the present and past.

 

[Allanxyz]

Whilst I understand what your saying, that is simply allowing them to get away with it, which is wrong, and is why they brag about it, they think and believe they are untouchable!

It doesn't have to be an 'angry letter', just one that highlights the issues and attitudes being openly displayed and that it will cause members to leave and visitors to not return, I'm sure any GM wouldn't want that, unless you have a waiting list and are comfortably a cash-rich club?

I see where you are coming from, but I'm definitely not one to rock the boat... especially being new. I know this doesn't help the situation as a whole and for others but I also want to settle into the club without any fuss.

On the balance of the replies I wasn't totally in the right here, lesson learnt a bit regarding playing through (I've never really done it in the past as I've either been asked to play through or joined up with a group in front)... Obviously the bloke could have been a lot more friendly about it and it annoys me a bit when people are determined not to let anyone play through... but hey ho... think I'll take a few peoples advice and just forget about it..

 

[Fish]

I see where you are coming from, but I'm definitely not one to rock the boat... especially being new. I know this doesn't help the situation as a whole and for others but I also want to settle into the club without any fuss.

On the balance of the replies I wasn't totally in the right here, lesson learnt a bit regarding playing through (I've never really done it in the past as I've either been asked to play through or joined up with a group in front)... Obviously the bloke could have been a lot more friendly about it and it annoys me a bit when people are determined not to let anyone play through... but hey ho... think I'll take a few peoples advice and just forget about it..

I understand your position, and whilst you accept on this occasion you were 'mildly' wrong, it still didn't need them to confront you over it, especially as it as not an isolated incident as you were behind at least 1 of them before, so their attitude stinks IMO!

 

[DCB]

This is getting blown out of all proportion. 3 old farts were slowly making their way round the course, they were wrong in not letting the OP through. The Op tried to jump ahead but didn't jump far enough ahead so as to be out of their way on a following hole.

Next time, jump two holes ahead , that way your well out the way.

No need for letters to Sec or GM, these old farts probably wouldn't take any notice anyway.

This happens too often across the country, but,no point in getting too wound up, it's only a game after all

 

[mab]

Has anyone ever played through the group in front without being offered to play through? So, in this instance, the OP legitimately asks to be allowed to play through, the group rejects that request and the OP continues to play through anyway. The thought brought a smile to my face... putting out whilst the others were on the green trying to putt as well.

OP - not ideal that you made them wait; you should really have jumped in a little further up the hole so they didn't have to wait for you when teeing off. However, with the additinal insight provided re: their attitudes, I wouldn't give it a second thought. Next time, ask if you can play through - I would expect them to accept when asked directly, or it would be interesting to hear their excuse if they rejected your request.

 

[Fish]

This is getting blown out of all proportion. 3 old farts were slowly making their way round the course, they were wrong in not letting the OP through. The Op tried to jump ahead but didn't jump far enough ahead so as to be out of their way on a following hole.

Next time, jump two holes ahead , that way your well out the way.

No need for letters to Sec or GM, these old farts probably wouldn't take any notice anyway.

This happens too often across the country, but,no point in getting too wound up, it's only a game after all

Dave, I don't think it is being 'blown out of proportion' because it goes on far too much at clubs nationwide and can make new members uncomfortable and in some circumstances even leave as quickly as they arrived, as such, I think it needs airing and bringing to the fore, not turning a blind eye to these idiots. It wasn't an isolated incident also and as James highlighted, these individuals 'brag' about their antis, so, should we just all just accept it and work around them? I say no!

 

[NST]

As far as I'm concerned if they are too ignorant to check of players behind them or aware of quicker players behind them, either single or group then they are in the wrong. Again if they can't keep up with the group in front of them, their problem not yours.

Also they as a three ball could have invited you to join them. I've often done it when a playing as a two ball, with a few four balls ahead (they can't all let you through) invited the two ball behind to join us and make a fourball to give us a similar pace of play to those ahead.

 

[chrisd]

Dave, I don't think it is being 'blown out of proportion' because it goes on far too much at clubs nationwide and can make new members uncomfortable and in some circumstances even leave as quickly as they arrived, as such, I think it needs airing and bringing to the fore, not turning a blind eye to these idiots. It wasn't an isolated incident also and as James highlighted, these individuals 'brag' about their antis, so, should we just all just accept it and work around them? I say no!

I absolutely agree with Fish on this one

I recently had problems with a group who just wouldn't let us through until we really pushed them to, they got upset, we were upset but they were three guys, one in his 80's and a lady and they not only couldn't play but couldn't barely walk either. A couple of weeks later the 80 year old and one of the other men caused me and a friend to take 2 hours for 8 holes. I asked them on the 7th if they were ever going to call us through, they made it clear they wouldn't -so - just in case they were playing 18 holes we skipped from the 9th fairway to the 10th tee and although they weren't going on their gesticulations made it clear they were unhappy!

I complained about them to the Secretary when I got in but doubt anything was said to them, I don't have a problem with them playing but they should be forced to look back and where complaints are laid they should be warned!

 

[Rumpokid]

This is getting blown out of all proportion. 3 old farts were slowly making their way round the course, they were wrong in not letting the OP through. The Op tried to jump ahead but didn't jump far enough ahead so as to be out of their way on a following hole.

Next time, jump two holes ahead , that way your well out the way.

No need for letters to Sec or GM, these old farts probably wouldn't take any notice anyway.

This happens too often across the country, but,no point in getting too wound up, it's only a game after all

Agree with this comment,after reading the thread. Don't forget there are always 2 sides to a story too...Want to try being in my shoes after the w/end (golf), i have had.....

 

[chrisd]

.


Don't forget there are always 2 sides to a story too..


....

I really don't agree!

 

[Rumpokid]

I really don't agree!

You wouldn't!!

 

[chrisd]

You wouldn't!!

So read my post and tell me what reason they could have had for forcing us into a 2 hours for 8 holes?

 

[Rumpokid]

So read my post and tell me what reason they could have had for forcing us into a 2 hours for 8 holes?

Scuse me..My original post was in reply to the point raisedat the start of thread..Nowt to do with your troubles!..And agreeing with DCB...Soz.

 

[Jon321]

If it was me I really wouldn't be bothered about them having a go at me. They would have had a few words flying back at them that they may not have liked. I agree with Fish that the senior members of your club shouldn't be let to get away with it. I'm new to my current club and luckily everyone so far has been lovely but I won't hold back from saying something if something similar happened.