Mental Issues

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Me too - used to really struggle, sometimes still do. It happens, you have to accept it. I read about 20 books. Attended seminars & mind coaching etc.
I won't say I didn't learn anything but nothing stopped the thoughts and rage of messing up a shot, a hole, a round etc.
It was getting to the point of costing me friendships.
Chimp Paradox was good - endorsed by Sir Chris Hoy. Bit weird but good to isolate actions, thoughts & reactions.

Then I read Stillpower by Garret Kramer and somewhere along the line I changed.
I became a different golfing personality, more than anything I wanted to be happy and be fun to play with.
Didn't want to lose the intensity/focus but I wanted to lighten up.
After I understood what Kramer was talking about it all happened so easily it's hard to understand or explain why I struggled for so long.
I just wish I'd "got it" much much earlier in life.

You gotta learn to forgive yourself for hitting crap shots, learn to "accept outcomes".
It's not like you woke up thinking I'm going out to skank it round the course today or "I'm going to do my best to triple bogey this".
Quite the opposite, you're trying to play your best, but you can't do that from a bad headspace.
You gotta learn patience and belief that's not attached to performances.
that'll make it easier to move on to the next job, to focus on what you'll do next.
Sometimes you'll still be brewing/raging for several shots or holes - no problem, accept it, it will pass.
Kind of have to give up.. let it go... get out of your own way. Don't focus so hard that you can't imagine a shot...

I once won a tournament when I'd played so bad through 11th I texted my wife to say, "OMW hating this, playing rubbish, will be home soon x"
I then went -2 under for next 7 holes and won it - strange game. I won it after I gave up... how does that even work?

Physically - deep breathing and letting your eyes move around taking everything in really helps.
 
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Try everything above until you find something that works for you. We're all different and not everything will work for everyone.

I suffer from this from time to time and tried pretty much all of the things mentioned. Some just didn't work for me, some worked sometimes.

What works for me 'most' of the time is when I'm standing behind the next shot to just really get a picture in my mind of the shot I want to hit and focus on that image in my head, then step in and make my swing. Don't take too long over the ball as negative thoughts will creep in, but don't rush it either.
 
Also - when I get a bit stressed and find myself rushing I start singing (to myself) The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy). The words make it obvious why I sing this particular ditty. I've done this from my time as a member of East Ren back in the mid-late 1970s when I was learning and used to get very frustrated - so it's part of me and my game. As I sing along to myself I also deliberately slow down my walking pace...
 
Also - when I get a bit stressed and find myself rushing I start singing (to myself) The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy). The words make it obvious why I sing this particular ditty. I've done this from my time as a member of East Ren back in the mid-late 1970s when I was learning and used to get very frustrated - so it's part of me and my game. As I sing along to myself I also deliberately slow down my walking pace...

Nice choice. I've got to try that ... apart from the "slow down you move to fast" bit, it is also a song that is impossible to sing without inwardly bouncing and smiling :thup:
 
Also - when I get a bit stressed and find myself rushing I start singing (to myself) The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feelin' Groovy). The words make it obvious why I sing this particular ditty. I've done this from my time as a member of East Ren back in the mid-late 1970s when I was learning and used to get very frustrated - so it's part of me and my game. As I sing along to myself I also deliberately slow down my walking pace...


Haha!

For matchplay... I use
Apply Some Pressure by Maximo Park

I'd like to wait to see how things turn out
If you apply some pressure
I like to wait to see how things turn out
If you apply some pressure!

What happens when you lose everything?
You just start again
You start all over again
 
UPDATE: I[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Tahoma, Calibri, Geneva, sans-serif]'ve been reading a good book called Golf Psychology by Jonathan Adler. I played yesterday and took 8 on the par 4 3rd hole ... and, as I left the green, I stopped and said "done", took a deep breath and looked around at nature and thought what a lovely day to be out playing ... and then parred the par 5 4th! I had three bad holes in the round, but got back on track each time on the next one. Not saying I've cracked it, but an encouraging start.[/FONT]
 
Started double bogey, double bogey and with only 7 shots to play with it wasn't the best of starts. Although its a bit of a cliché, I just play the shot in front of me. No point in worrying about the last one, nor the one two shots ahead. Sadly, I finished double bogey, bogey courtesy of a driving rain and a gale that sprang up and was gone as we walked of the last green.

But by staying calm, concentrating on playing it shot by shot, the end result was 7 dropped shot - level to handicap.
 
UPDATE: I[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Tahoma, Calibri, Geneva, sans-serif]'ve been reading a good book called Golf Psychology by Jonathan Adler. I played yesterday and took 8 on the par 4 3rd hole ... and, as I left the green, I stopped and said "done", took a deep breath and looked around at nature and thought what a lovely day to be out playing ... and then parred the par 5 4th! I had three bad holes in the round, but got back on track each time on the next one. Not saying I've cracked it, but an encouraging start.[/FONT]

Larry Adler, was famous for his deep breath, harmonica.:D .
 
Denis Pugh and John O'Keefe (?) did a simple book that could be downloaded with techniques that can help - I've used some of them and they made a difference. It's a very simple layout that might not look good but give it a whirl

https://www.amazon.co.uk/NEW-GOLF-THINKING-BREAKTHROUGH-ILLUSTRATED-ebook/dp/B00HXO9XHC

I was a big fan of this and went to the launch with GM at the Grove. However, I have to be honest I've a) neglected it significantly and b) lost the book I bought. It's a very simple technique and does work so you've pricked my conscience and will start looking at this again
 
I was a big fan of this and went to the launch with GM at the Grove. However, I have to be honest I've a) neglected it significantly and b) lost the book I bought. It's a very simple technique and does work so you've pricked my conscience and will start looking at this again

To be fair Homer I thought it was was a crock of shehilte and I'm a strong advocate of working on the mental side of the game
 
I have solved it!

You imagine one of your mates ripping you for being a nutjob and think to yourself "I'm not giving you the satisfaction". :rofl:
 
To be fair Homer I thought it was was a crock of shehilte and I'm a strong advocate of working on the mental side of the game

Interesting you found it rubbish. I thought it gave some good insights and thoughts in a simple way (better than a chapter of waffle from Rotella to get a nugget) and some of the stuff (one more club etc) is more common sense than earth shattering mental retraining. It's just trying to break down golfer ego.
 
Interesting you found it rubbish. I thought it gave some good insights and thoughts in a simple way (better than a chapter of waffle from Rotella to get a nugget) and some of the stuff (one more club etc) is more common sense than earth shattering mental retraining. It's just trying to break down golfer ego.

I agree with you on Rotella, but I bought the book and just thought it was poorly written and mixed up mental issues with slow play rants
 
I tried the "Feeling Groovy" thing yesterday. My mum now officailly thinks I am crazy. It did not neccessarily help my golf, but it surely helped my mood. :D

I wish I could whistle. That would drive my playing partners absolutely nuts.
 
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