Laughter - the best medicine

My friends have had a chat with me and said that I'm too condescending and I should tone it down a bit.


For you people on here, condescending means to talk down to people!
 
Officer, there was a tree in the middle of the road. I swerved left, then right. But there were trees everywhere

Officer: that's your air freshener.
 
Thought of the day...

A shark could swim faster than me, but, on the other hand, I could run faster than a shark. So, in a triathlon it would all come down to who was the better cyclist.
 
Thought of the day...

A shark could swim faster than me, but, on the other hand, I could run faster than a shark. So, in a triathlon it would all come down to who was the better cyclist.
No, the swimming comes first so the shark would catch you and eat you.
You’d be disqualified for failing to cycle😂😂
 
So last night it was fish and chips after a drive back from Gatwick. Something didn’t smell Right When the chips etc were kept warm in the oven whilst we fannyed about for 10 Mins.
Anyway this morning missis T decides to clean the oven door and she happens to find a Single pigs in blanket in the bottom Of the oven that has been there since Xmas day. 🫣
 
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