Can People Change?

[USER1999]

I assumed this post would be about Wengers new contract.

 

[Fish]

No, because like Martin says, there's a difference between changing and putting on a public face, or simply 'making an effort'.

People around me say I've changed loads, but I know it's more about making the effort to change and how you would like to be perceived, because real change I think is difficult if not impossible as it's in your genes and there will always be that real you inside, it just may take something a little greater or worse to get it to show it's ugly face now than it did before!

I do feel better in what I try to do now and how I present myself to others, but I know also that I have the ability to throw it all away in a heartbeat, is that change, or just better control?!

 

[arnieboy]

At the weekend my wife and grown up kids told me that I am far less grumpy than I was a few years ago. Probably an age thing or perhaps it is about accepting life for what it is.

 

[Hobbit]

I think a leopard's spots can fade but I feel, in most instances, the individual could revert.

Equally, there's lots of murderers out there on parole.

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

No, because like Martin says, there's a difference between changing and putting on a public face, or simply 'making an effort'.

People around me say I've changed loads, but I know it's more about making the effort to change and how you would like to be perceived, because real change I think is difficult if not impossible as it's in your genes and there will always be that real you inside, it just may take something a little greater or worse to get it to show it's ugly face now than it did before!

I do feel better in what I try to do now and how I present myself to others, but I know also that I have the ability to throw it all away in a heartbeat, is that change, or just better control?!

I believe that a crucial part of changing is better control - and if you also then live an honest and more level life you do not need to act the part - you 'become the part'.

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

At the weekend my wife and grown up kids told me that I am far less grumpy than I was a few years ago. Probably an age thing or perhaps it is about accepting life for what it is.

Yup - acceptance is crucial. Life is full of problems, but we can learn to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune as that life is just life. And in that acceptance our life can be more level.

 

[MarkE]

I believe so. We never stop growing up and gaining life experience.

 

[SocketRocket]

Lifes a bitch and then you die

 

[ColchesterFC]

There's no apostrophe in 'heros' (plural)

Well, just to be 100% accurate (if we're correcting grammar and spelling, then) it's "heroes" (plural)

 

[Robster59]

No, because like Martin says, there's a difference between changing and putting on a public face, or simply 'making an effort'.

People around me say I've changed loads, but I know it's more about making the effort to change and how you would like to be perceived, because real change I think is difficult if not impossible as it's in your genes and there will always be that real you inside, it just may take something a little greater or worse to get it to show it's ugly face now than it did before!

I do feel better in what I try to do now and how I present myself to others, but I know also that I have the ability to throw it all away in a heartbeat, is that change, or just better control?!

It's a little of column A and a little of Column B. You learn better control and you also learn from your mistakes. I know what I was like as I grew up. A spoilt brat, then a petulant youth and then a fiery temper in my twenties. Nothing vicious (apart from the tongue) but for a lot of people who know me now would say I'm very easy going. That's because I've learnt from what I did. I've bitten my tongue more and learnt to reel it in. Some people are naturally easy going/kind/generous, others have to work at it.
People can change, but only if they want to change.
It's easy to make a change for the worse, it's more satisfying to make a change for the better.

 

[Tashyboy]

People can change, but should part of the question be for better or worse. Do we assume the change bit is for the better.
Reason I say this is because Missis T has mentioned before that in her job she has seen people's/ patients personalitys change overnight. It has usually been triggered by the news " You have the big C" or something else that is a life changer.
People that were laid back, easy going, it's not a problem, let it go etc. Change into people that take no crap, question things, want it now etc.
People that formerly took no crap, questioned things, wanted it now. change into being easy going etc.

 

[HomerJSimpson]

I definitely changed for the better once I was forced to stop my drinking every night. My wife is happier with the "new" me and we have more time and money to spend on better things. For a long time (too long) it was a case of the pub at the centre and my world revolving around it. Don't get me wrong, I/we had some cracking nights and I met some great people who have become good mates but I'm a more tolerant and patient person now and better (and healthier) for it.

I like to think people can change. There are plenty of documented accounts of criminals finally changing path, and making amends (to a degree). It's a question of people really wanting to do so and having the courage and patience to make the change and make it permanent

 

[clubchamp98]

Yup - acceptance is crucial. Life is full of problems, but we can learn to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune as that life is just life. And in that acceptance our life can be more level.

Never thought Shakespere would appear on the forum.
People can change but not always for the good .
Its life experiences that change you.
It depends who you upset or wrong as you go along , I always treat people as I would like to be treated.
My Mum taught me this and it's a good model to have.
unfortnatley some kids are not so fortunate .

 

[Farmergeddon]

So!! lets suppose what Savile did could be proved to be years ago and all the stuff he did for charity later on far outweighed the bad would that be OK then??? should his memorial be replaced?? Should we forget about his victims??

 

[virtuocity]

Saville is now quickly overtaking Hitler in the 'people we compare others to in order to make a (poor) point'

 

[user2010]

...

 

[Farmergeddon]

Saville is now quickly overtaking Hitler in the 'people we compare others to in order to make a (poor) point'

There's another clever reply from the caring sharing north of the border.