In the depths of despair….

[Sweep]

I feel for you. I really do.
My advice FWIW would be firstly to forget YouTube. I know you are looking for answers and I know all too well it’s addictive, but right now you can do more harm than good. Right now, you don’t actually know what you are trying to resolve.
Forget everything you have “learned” from You Tube or anywhere else and start again with a clear mind. Treat yourself like a complete beginner.
Find a good pro and commit to a series of lessons. A good pro is not necessarily one who gets instant results. A good pro is patient, they will put you at ease, they will make learning fun. They will have worked with many, many beginners and believe me, many of them will have been worse than you. A lot worse. They will have zero expectations from you in a lesson, so there is no need to worry or be at all nervous. This is supposed to be enjoyable. For a good pro, this is the most rewarding part of their job. To see a student flourish, to make progress, to see the joy the game can bring when a student flushes shots for the first time and see them realise they can play this game.
Finding this good pro is key. Speak to them about your situation before you commit. Make sure they are a pro who values teaching beginners. A good sign would be one who is part of the “Get Into Golf” program.
The truth is golf is hard. Part of me thinks the way to hit a ball with a golf club to get the best results is not a natural move. The swing must be learned. So don’t be too hard on yourself. You can play this game and your perseverance will be rewarded many times over. It’s a wonderful game for many, many reasons. So don’t give up. You can play this game.

 

[Robster59]

Sometimes you can just overanalyze things, you try so many different fixes and finish up with a swing that is a compromise of many techniques that counter-act each other.
It may be a question of going back to basics, getting your natural swing back and getting a few lessons from there.
Over-hitting the ball is common for many people, and I have found that by trying to reduce my backswing, and slowing it down, I am more accurate with little loss of distance as I am hitting it more in the centre of the face.
It's an easy thing to say but try to relax, enjoy the game, and don't overthink it.

 

[AliMc]

I had a spell, about 4 or 5 years ago, where I was going to pack it in and give up my membership at Dunbar, had other things on the go and hadn't really been enjoying it for a while. Then I dragged myself out for a game one sunny evening, the course was virtually empty and I stood in the middle of the 12th fairway (you can't see the town from there only the sea and a couple of other holes, no one else was in sight) and thought to myself how can you give this up ?
Now retired I'm playing 2 or 3 times a week with a great bunch of guys and loving every minute of it, so don't give up, do as others have said and try and treat it as fun and a nice walk in the fresh air, keep persevering and things might turn round as they did for me

 

[HomerJSimpson]

I feel for you. I really do.
My advice FWIW would be firstly to forget YouTube. I know you are looking for answers and I know all too well it’s addictive, but right now you can do more harm than good. Right now, you don’t actually know what you are trying to resolve.
Forget everything you have “learned” from You Tube or anywhere else and start again with a clear mind. Treat yourself like a complete beginner.
Find a good pro and commit to a series of lessons. A good pro is not necessarily one who gets instant results. A good pro is patient, they will put you at ease, they will make learning fun. They will have worked with many, many beginners and believe me, many of them will have been worse than you. A lot worse. They will have zero expectations from you in a lesson, so there is no need to worry or be at all nervous. This is supposed to be enjoyable. For a good pro, this is the most rewarding part of their job. To see a student flourish, to make progress, to see the joy the game can bring when a student flushes shots for the first time and see them realise they can play this game.
Finding this good pro is key. Speak to them about your situation before you commit. Make sure they are a pro who values teaching beginners. A good sign would be one who is part of the “Get Into Golf” program.
The truth is golf is hard. Part of me thinks the way to hit a ball with a golf club to get the best results is not a natural move. The swing must be learned. So don’t be too hard on yourself. You can play this game and your perseverance will be rewarded many times over. It’s a wonderful game for many, many reasons. So don’t give up. You can play this game.

If the OP goes down this route and I think given his despondency at the moment it makes sound advice and good sense, the one thing they'll knew to do is work on the changes and the drills. I know from talking to my club pro the most frustrating thing he finds, isn't how bad some people are, but the fact he has given them a lesson and something to work on and when they ask how the practice went and they say "I haven't done any since I saw you". Why bother? Golf is hard and if you are going to learn how to play better with lessons, do the hard work. It won't happen any other way

 

[wisey10]

Thanks everyone.

I have got a very quiet course nearby so plan to get a couple of rounds in on my own in a quiet slot. Will concentrate on just relaxing, not over swinging and not trying to hit it too hard. 3 things that I’ve been failing to do.

I think I will finally bite the bullet and book a block of lessons too. Though I can’t lie, I still have some reticence doing so!

If I have any joy in the coming weeks I will pop back with an update ?

 

[Marshy77]

As a good, bad, indifferent golfer and totally unqualified I'd suggest forgetting the videos, try play in the hope you shoot 105/110 again and hit what you feel the most comfortable off the tee.

Also play to get back to enjoying it again. I'm similar to yourself in the that I can shoot a mid 90's and then a 105 the next game. I think if your mentality is that you'll shoot and be happy with what you average then you'll enjoy the game far more. You'll score 7's, 8's and the odd 9 but might have a couple of bogeys, possibly a par. Be under no illusions that you'll shoot a 90.

Yours, a very frustrated golfer.

 

[Mel Smooth]

Personally, I'd ask round the local area for advice on who is a good pro / assistant pro to get lessons from, go to them and tell then what you're issues are.

If you want to play golf, then play golf. The beauty of the game is it can be enjoyed at pretty much every level of ability.

 

[bobmac]

Golf can be split into only 2 categories....
1. How you hit it
2. Where you hit it

If you are struggling with 1. keep your head still and don't sway.
If you are struggling with 2. check your grip and aim.

KISS and you won't go far wrong.

Disclaimer
There's a bit more to it but that's a good start

 

[ntommo]

Book half a dozen lessons with a recommended golf instructor and read "Golf is not a game of Perfect" by Bob Rotella. Job done