davidy233
Tour Rookie
What is this IKEA some of you comment on? 
Golf - The unwritten rules....
- Thread starter effayjay
- Start date
SwingsitlikeHogan
Major Champion
The player whose ball is in a fairway bunker and proclaims that he is rubbish out of fairway bunkers will then proceed to demonstrate just quite how unbelievably rubbish he is (that's me btw 
)
)
chrisd
Major Champion
The water in the stream that is 170 yards away is only 12" wide, you couldn't go in it deliberatey if you hit 100 balls, but your shot to the green is going nowhere else!
SwingsitlikeHogan
Major Champion
What is this IKEA some of you comment on?
It is a gigantic shoe box that once entered traps you, and you find that it is filled with blokes wandering about 'zombie-like' wistfully muttering things like 'I should be on the golf course' - no-one is listening as they are too busy filling great big bags with 'stuff'. But you do get useful wee brown pencils - perfect for marking your card - but once broke (they never last long enough to go blunt) might as well be chucked as you can never sharpen one.
KhalJimbo
Head Pro
LOL thats me
londonlewis
Tour Rookie
If you happen to notice on the 16th green that you have sunk a putt to go 4 under your handicap, you will promptly shoot a double-triple finish to end up with 35 points.
Slime
Tour Winner
After hitting a really good tee shot you MUST spend at least two minutes looking for that 'lucky' tee peg!
Slime.
Slime.
Jimaroid
Journeyman Pro
Finding your pink castle tee is more important than finding your ball.
williamalex1
Money List Winner
I usually say " don't worry someone will hand it in ". :smirk:
jamielaing
Q-School Graduate
What is this IKEA some of you comment on?
It's this place that no man has any desire to go to yet every Saturday you see them being dragged around in the search of 'stuff we need' otherwise known as c**p. It takes at least 3 hours and the rules are that you must leave with at least 10 apple candles. There is a fee to leave and it is normally over £100. This is done with the promise of meatballs but 'we never have time'. Don't make plans for the evening, if you do make it out of there you are obliged to become a carpenter for the evening.
Golfmmad
Tour Winner
The easiest way to embarrass oneself on a golf course:
Is to announce, "I get 2 shots on this par 3"!
This will usually really p--- your lower hp. playing partners off at the same time.
Is to announce, "I get 2 shots on this par 3"!
This will usually really p--- your lower hp. playing partners off at the same time.
Rooter
Money List Winner
Wild hooks or slices always sounded nice off the face..
Doh
Journeyman Pro
If you are drawn to play with someone who you have never met you are good mates by the end of the round.
SwingsitlikeHogan
Major Champion
...and if you go to the Southampton one and leave at the wrong time you will get tangled up with John Lewis traffic and stuck in Southampton's horrid roads - do not expect to get home before daybreak.
SwingsitlikeHogan
Major Champion
Mr Smug hits it off the tee - 'No idea where that went' is likely to mean he has totally creamed it miles down the middle; that he knows full well that that's what he's done; but just wants the others to acknowledge his brilliance by having to tell him. Immediately followed by a knowing piece of self-deprecation.
When playing a low index par 4 and a high handicapper say's "I'm on the green for nowt" or a par 5 and there on for 1
D
Deleted member 16999
Guest
Fixed it for you😜When playing a low index par 4 with me and I say' "I'm on the green for nowt" or a par 5 and I'm on for 1
View attachment 17382
LincolnShep
Head Pro
All topped drives shall be measured by referencing their position relative to the ladies' tees
LincolnShep
Head Pro
It's not a slice - it's a "power fade".
davidy233
Tour Rookie
Surely you'd just send one of the servants? Weekends are for football, golf and beer
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