Giving up golf

[Ethan]

Played golf for 40+ years, got down to 9 by age 18 or so, and stayed around there more or less ever since, up and down the odd shot. Lowest around 7.5. Used to be a decent length hitter, 240 carry with 100mph speed, but recently falling off, now low 90s and less consistent, hitting complete duffs more often than I used to. Now 8.7 index, and don't see it getting much better.

I have always played golf to score well. Getting a decent score, reducing handicap, hitting nice shots, but this is now getting harder than it used to, and I think I have passed the peak where playing smart and A tidy short game overcomes some of the initial age-related distance loss. Apart from on holiday, never really just played for fun. Hate playing badly.

Also not getting value out of golf membership, don't play during winter at all, try to play most weekends in April-October, but between family commitments, football games with my boys (Reading FC, so more misery) and other stuff, works out around 20 or so rounds a year. Made worse by the fact that at my place, can book a tee time, with other people down, get up there and find they have cancelled or gone early and I don't have anybody to play with, so go home. Happened twice recently.

So I have more or less decided I am going to give up my golf membership and competitive golf. Will (or might) still play on holiday, and will keep clubs, but otherwise retiring. Still not quite 60.

Any thoughts?

 

[gopher99]

Dont quit just yet, I understand your frustrations as I have many a time wanted to give up the game. You are a decent player and a fun person to play golf with, even if your game is going south at the moment. Maybe see out this year and go from there.

 

[IanM]

Well... supporting Reading should be sufficient to have you transported to the Colonies!

I'm surprised you have issues with games at Bearwood. Maybe you need to get a new group to play with. But if you are not playing enough to get value from it, maybe cancelling it is an option, albeit a drastic (bad) one. A mate of mine doesn't play much through the winter. He cancelled membership at his local course, joined Orchardleigh (for a POUND a year, plus County Fees) so he can keep his handicap there and live. He has never actually played Orchardleigh and plays Open Events in the season and also has country membership at Royal St David's (very cheap) and he goes there every month or so.

Maybe don't retire, just revamp?

 

[needmoreclub]

Feel your pain sir. I've been where you are recently and decided to take a 'break' from golf in general but kept my membership on. Didn't miss it at all for at least 3 weeks, then started to think about 'maybe' going up to the club to chip & putt. Was at a loose end one day and ventured up, bottom line is i'm now back playing and my game is a work in progress, still not back to where i'd like to be, but more enjoyable as i've taken the expectations out of it and try to not expect the 'old' me and just take what i get. Still get the odd anger head on but quickly remind myself i'm 62 and can't compete the way i used to. Don't walk away, just take a break and see if you miss it.

 

[Hobbit]

Pretty much gave up 3 years ago - too painful. Got an itch after 2 years, and played maybe 5 games but it just didn’t give me the buzz. I started in July ‘68 and played mid to low single figures most of my golfing life. Was off 6 when I gave up 3 yrs back. I might play the odd game when my son is over but I don’t miss it one bit.

 

[Mel Smooth]

You’re getting older, your games bound to suffer.
Have to had any lessons to try and lessen the impact of your body getting less able?

Maybe you need to re-address what you get out of golf, and focus on the social and physical benefits rather than worrying about your score - maybe even try some CBD gummies, if you haven’t already.

From what you are saying, and the reasons given, I’d say if you give up, that will be it as everyone you play you’re going to face the same issues you find frustrating now.

 

[Deleted member 1147]

If you don’t like it, quit.
I did for 5 years about 20 years ago.
After the break I love more than ever.

 

[Lord Tyrion]

Have a break but don't sell your clubs. Maybe even give up your membership, just go pay and play and play when you fancy it. If you don't fancy it, no harm done.

You don't have to make a definite decision that lasts forever at this stage.

 

[jim8flog]

Made worse by the fact that at my place, can book a tee time, with other people down, get up there and find they have cancelled or gone early and I don't have anybody to play with, so go home. Happened twice recently.

So I have more or less decided I am going to give up my golf membership and competitive golf. Will (or might) still play on holiday, and will keep clubs, but otherwise retiring. Still not quite 60.

Any thoughts?

As you have a booking system can you not check before leaving home.

How long before your tee time do you turn up at the first tee?

60 seems a young age to give to me but there again I have known many a good player give up in their 20s. What are you going to do when you retire?

Can you bring it to the attention of the club manager and ask him to request players to check.

I once had to send out the starter to chase down the players I was supposed to be with to wait for me as it was a medal and needed them to be my marker.

 

[Crow]

Definitely sell your clubs.

Then buy some vintage ones and open up a whole new world of golf.

 

[bobmac]

If you are hitting too many duffs, the bottom of the arc has moved back behind the ball.
Do you still finish up with the weight on the front foot and with your rear foot up on the toe, balanced?

 

[Tower]

These days, I contemplate giving up during or after almost every round, but the occasional magic strike and the many other positive elements of golf always overcome that negative thought.

 

[Deleted member 25575]

It depends what you want out of golf in fairness. From reading your opening post, it sounds to me like your take golf seriously, perhaps too seriously maybe?
It is supposed to be a hobby, something we do for fun at our level. Play well and you may win a comp and £60 shop credit, play badly, you’re still on the right side of the ground, nobody dies, you, your friends and family are all still as healthy as they were a few short hours ago.
That’s how, in my opinion, golf should be viewed and played, that very much doesn’t mean that’s how you should view and play it.
At the end of the day, if you’re no longer getting enjoyment from it for whatever reason, then it probably is time to quit

 

[Crazyface]

God almighty if we gave up coz we are having a bad spell there would be no one playing the game. My hc has gone up from 14 to 18 this year.....so far. It don't half make me smile when a par get me 4 points. Lol. (18 can get you a playing hc of 21). You can obviously play just let your hc catch up with you.

 

[Maninblack4612]

It's a bit sad that someone who has played for over 40 years doesn't have a regular fourball or group to play in. Is this because you don't play in the winter? One of the pleasures of the game for me is the company of people I get on well with, the banter, camaraderie & friendly competition. At 76, I'm reconciled to never playing off single figures again but that doesn't stop me from trying to improve, even having the odd lesson.

If you give up at such an early age I think you'll regret it. There are people older than you playing off plus handicaps. Can you not set yourself a challenge of some kind? I'm determined to beat my age, just need to save about 15 shots a round & I've done it!

I hope you find a way to get enjoyment out of a game that you could be playing for another 20 years.

 

[Voyager EMH]

"...never really just played for fun. Hate playing badly."

You are approaching the time of playing golf in your 60s and beyond.
It is a very good idea to continue playing something you have a talent for, is good for your health, etc.

You should consider giving up and changing that approach to golf that you have had rather than giving up golf itself.

40 years of no-fun golf, yet you continued playing?
I have plenty of hope for you that you can have many years of enjoyable golf in the years to come.

 

[RichA]

Why not quit Bearwood Lakes and find a smaller, more informal club?
At least try playing golf for fun and relaxation without just caring about the score. For most of my social group it's the craic that brings us together more than the golf - not that we don't take it seriously when it suits us.
You don't mention if your sons play or their ages, but a club that's less stuffy than BL would surely be more engaging for kids.
Good luck with whatever you decide anyway.

 

[GB72]

Played golf for 40+ years, got down to 9 by age 18 or so, and stayed around there more or less ever since, up and down the odd shot. Lowest around 7.5. Used to be a decent length hitter, 240 carry with 100mph speed, but recently falling off, now low 90s and less consistent, hitting complete duffs more often than I used to. Now 8.7 index, and don't see it getting much better.

I have always played golf to score well. Getting a decent score, reducing handicap, hitting nice shots, but this is now getting harder than it used to, and I think I have passed the peak where playing smart and A tidy short game overcomes some of the initial age-related distance loss. Apart from on holiday, never really just played for fun. Hate playing badly.

Also not getting value out of golf membership, don't play during winter at all, try to play most weekends in April-October, but between family commitments, football games with my boys (Reading FC, so more misery) and other stuff, works out around 20 or so rounds a year. Made worse by the fact that at my place, can book a tee time, with other people down, get up there and find they have cancelled or gone early and I don't have anybody to play with, so go home. Happened twice recently.

So I have more or less decided I am going to give up my golf membership and competitive golf. Will (or might) still play on holiday, and will keep clubs, but otherwise retiring. Still not quite 60.

Any thoughts?

Whilst not at the same level as you, I went into a downward spiral. Weather, work and family commitments meant I played less and less, the less I played, the worse I played and so my enjoyment level went down. More unique to me as well but I have oftern mentioned my issues with golf clubs. The final straw for me was a few years ago when it rained pretty much from October to February. I had a month on garden leave and did not get to play once. Then, because our course drained well and others were closed, we were allowing reciprocols on at weekends from other clubs (the only time I could play) and there was a 90 minute queue on the tee for most of the day. I was not getting enjoyment or value out of my membership and so I quit and found other hobbies. Had 3 years off and did not miss it but now I am starting to test the waters about playing again. We shall see.

I always found life is too short to waste time doing something I do not like and so I put the clubs away. Time will tell if they come out again.

 

[Orikoru]

The fact you've asked for our thoughts makes it feel like you don't really want to give it up - you're looking for one of us to talk you out of it or give you a reason to keep playing. I think certainly give up the membership where you are if you're not feeling it - not wanting to play as much, not having people to play with. But as others have said maybe you can find a cheaper part-time membership or just pay and play as and when you feel like it somewhere. So you're not committed to anything.

 

[abjectplop]

If you've got the time and motivation, have a look at some basic golf fitness - mobility, strength and speed work. See https://fitforgolf.blog/ - he reckons everyone has got an easy 5-10mph to be gained with some training so getting back to 100mph shouldn't be too difficult.