Childcare costs more than mortgages...

[Hacker Khan]

Children need to be brought up by their parents. When our kids were small my wife stayed at home & looked after them. It was, financially, a struggle but we, she in particular, wouldn't have wanted it any other way. Leaving your children in the care of others is, in many people's opinion, the cause of many of the problems with children & young adults today. Let the dissenters commence posting!

You are right, in fact we should make it law that all women (and lets be clear here, it will be the women in the vast majority of cases) should forget any ideas of having a career and stay at home to bring up the kids.

Tune in next week when we ask the question, 'Women, should they really have the vote?'

 

[stevie_r]

You are right, in fact we should make it law that all women (and lets be clear here, it will be the women in the vast majority of cases) should forget any ideas of having a career and stay at home to bring up the kids.

Tune in next week when we ask the question, 'Women, should they really have the vote?'

No, it really is very simple - do not whine about the cost of child care, it's irritating. Your decision to have a child then deal with the consequences.

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

One of you is in employment that minimises dependency on childcare? Why is this so unacceptable. When mine were very little and we had no grandparents locally to help out on a regular basis - my wife did not work until my youngest could go to nursery - then she took a low paid part time nursing bank job in our local hospital that was way beneath her level of training and experience. As a result we did not have to depend upon expensive childcare and she could be flexible around school holidays - we were skint without her pre-kids pretty good wage - but we weren't forking out on expensive childcare 5 days a week and she just did not work during school holidays. Holidays? - very limited indeed. Luxuries? - we just did without. Golf? - not until my youngest was 8 yrs old and eldest 11.

These days this doesn't seem to be an option for many. I am not sure why. Maybe society has become just too 'entitled' rather than 'make do'

 

[stevie_r]

One of you is in employment that minimises dependency on childcare? Why is this so unacceptable. When mine were very little and we had no grandparents locally to help out on a regular basis - my wife did not work until my youngest could go to nursery - then she took a low paid part time nursing bank job in our local hospital that was way beneath her level of training and experience. As a result we did not have to depend upon expensive childcare and she could be flexible around school holidays - we were skint without her pre-kids pretty good wage - but we weren't forking out on expensive childcare 5 days a week and she just did not work during school holidays. Holidays? - very limited indeed. These days this doesn't seem to be an option for many. I am not sure why.

Aspiration, 'we must have the biggest and best of everything', rather than cutting your cloth accordingly.

 

[vkurup]

Aspiration, 'we must have the biggest and best of everything', rather than cutting your cloth accordingly.

Partially true.. My mom was a homemaker too and she brought us up alright (I think). times have changed/are changing. Women have career aspirations and they need the support. Also cost of living has gone up, and you need all the money that you can find. Increasingly Dad jobs are also not certain, so a lot of mums doing more than just supplement the income. In case of single moms, the cost of childcare would force them into benefits rather than work.

Ironically, as i write this, my mrs has decided to go part time, so she can spend more time with nipper. Tough decision for her as she does not know if her career will bounce back to her pre-kid days. But then women are far stronger about these things then men <there I said it>

 

[Doon frae Troon]

When did it change from t'other side of Maidstone??

I meant the M3 not the N/S divide.
Agree M4 is the true boundary.
Expect protests from Devon and Cornwall any time soon.

 

[CMAC]

Childcare is expensive, no point in moaning as thats the cost, pay it or make alternative arrangements.

Is it too expensive? what cost on ensuring the most precious thing in your life is looked after safely and securely?


You can't keep the same lifestyle when you have a child or children. Same cars, holidays, luxury goods etc if you can then good for you, but the majority of us can't, we'd like to and if I'm honest we try to, but the costs don't get less as they grow:mmm:

must dash- off to my second job to afford this years subs, then ebay tonight to pay for house and car insurance

 

[Rumpokid]

With more and more schools doing the breakfast clubs(ha,ha)..After school activities like detention,surely childcare is only an option for pre-school...Helmet is on...

 

[MarkA]

No, it really is very simple - do not whine about the cost of child care, it's irritating. Your decision to have a child then deal with the consequences.

Amen to that ! And also don't whinge about losing child support if you earn over £50k

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

Amen to that ! And also don't whinge about losing child support if you earn over £50k

But I can whinge about those separated/divorced couples who's children get bursaries and/or grants for university courses on the grounds of the mother's income. When dad-departed is in fact showering largesse on the family through some clever-dick accountancy scheme/scam (and the same went for Education Maintenance Allowance - now scrapped)

And likes of me and Mrs have to scrape together the money to put ours through uni with absolutely NO help from the state or unis - on the grounds of our income being 'just' over any threshold - conveniently ignoring that living in a very expensive part of the country our disposable income is well clobbered by the costs-of-living/housing.

And don't start me on unis giving bursaries to attract students with good A-levels - when a lot of these kids have got them through going to private school and whose parent are loaded. Resentments? moi ? Oui - I have a few

 

[guest100718]

Amen to that ! And also don't whinge about losing child support if you earn over £50k

I dunno, if you were used to getting it for years and then had it taken away. seems a bit unfair

 

[Rooter]

Amen to that ! And also don't whinge about losing child support if you earn over £50k

you need to look at the bigger picture, lets use the below as an example.

I earn £51k a year. My wife stays home to look after the kids.
my neighbors both work and both earn £49.5k EACH.

They get child benefit, i dont.

Just making a point, its not as black and white as the daily mail may have you believe.

 

[guest100718]

you need to look at the bigger picture, lets use the below as an example.

I earn £51k a year. My wife stays home to look after the kids.
my neighbors both work and both earn £49.5k EACH.

They get child benefit, i dont.

Just making a point, its not as black and white as the daily mail may have you believe.

And if you have 3 kids its quite a big loss.....

 

[vkurup]

Back to the old point about affordability... Just saw this stat:

Apparently, last year the number of pregnancies for over 40s outnumbered those under 19 in England & Wales.

You can slice it either way, that women are leaving it later to have pregnancies as they sort out careers etc, also those under 19 are making educated choices...

 

[Rooter]

And if you have 3 kids its quite a big loss.....

I'm soon to have 4...

no problem, i will pay for my own kids. just doesn't seem "fair" that a FAMILY that earn a lot more money than me, get benefits that my kids are not eligible for. we only ever used the CB payments for their activities etc,

 

[woody69]

believe it or not independent nurseries make very little money as profit due to all of the costs involved with looking after children and the high cost involved with ensure child to adult ratios are always maintained. The only way nurseries make a lot of money is when there is a large chain with many locations.

 

[Rooter]

believe it or not independent nurseries make very little money as profit due to all of the costs involved with looking after children and the high cost involved with ensure child to adult ratios are always maintained. The only way nurseries make a lot of money is when there is a large chain with many locations.

My brother and his wife run 2... they do ok

 

[Foxholer]

But I can whinge about those separated/divorced couples who's children get bursaries and/or grants for university courses on the grounds of the mother's income. When dad-departed is in fact showering largesse on the family through some clever-dick accountancy scheme/scam (and the same went for Education Maintenance Allowance - now scrapped)

And likes of me and Mrs have to scrape together the money to put ours through uni with absolutely NO help from the state or unis - on the grounds of our income being 'just' over any threshold - conveniently ignoring that living in a very expensive part of the country our disposable income is well clobbered by the costs-of-living/housing.

And don't start me on unis giving bursaries to attract students with good A-levels - when a lot of these kids have got them through going to private school and whose parent are loaded. Resentments? moi ? Oui - I have a few

How many of those 'generous' ex-husbands are there - compared to the number being chased (or not) by the CSA to provide a basic life for the the ex and their kids!

Don't whinge about the 'benefits' others might be getting. Just make sure you are doing the best yourself/ves! It was, after all, your choice to live in 'a very expensive part of the country'!

 

[stevie_r]

Amen to that ! And also don't whinge about losing child support if you earn over £50k

And amen to that one too

 

[ManinBlack]

Originally Posted by Maninblack4612

Children need to be brought up by their parents. When our kids were small my wife stayed at home & looked after them. It was, financially, a struggle but we, she in particular, wouldn't have wanted it any other way.Leaving your children in the care of other is, in many people's opinion, the cause of many of the problems with children & young adults today. Let the dissenters commence posting!

Like Schools! Or Kindergartens!

Actually, yes. The more time the children spend away from your good influence the harder it is to bring them up correctly. At least if a parent is home when they return from school you have the time (& possibly more energy) to correct any bad influences inflicted on them when out of your care.