USER1999
Grand Slam Winner
I have spent the last few weeks emptying my 36ft long garage ready for an extension, and after a concerted effort over the weekend (including turning down a bounce game with some mates), had got down to just the one item left. A 1964 MGB roadster, which is a half abandoned project, that has been on axle stands for 10 years. Somehow golf has prevented me from ever finishing it.
I found a company through the inter web who would come and remove it and scrap it for free, and all was set for last night. (In theory you can get money for scrap cars, but it often doesn't work out like that, and this was simple, apparently, and painless too). So I pumped up the tyres, and took it off the stands before they arrived. I tried to see if it would roll, but despite having the brakes backed off during storage, no chance. Jacked it back up, front wheels ok, rear wheels a no.
I opened up the garage door in readiness. Now this hasn't been opened for 10 years either, and so after a lot of kicking, and beating with a large hammer, it flies open, drops of the rails and lands on top of the car, nearly taking my head off in the process.
So the guys turn up, with what appears to be an AA van. It has a winch to pull it out of the garage, and a hoist which can pick up the front wheels. I figure we can use the winch to pull it out of the garage, but they won't try this as there is no towing point, and they are unwilling to try attaching it anywhere else (like looping it round the back axle). They suggest starting it with a booster, but I wasn't convinced, and subsequently proved right. Amazingly there was still petrol in it, but the petrol pump had died. So no joy there.
I suggested backing the truck up the drive, and using the hoist, but no, they weren't confident their truck would fit up the drive. Odd, as I have had skip lorries up there before, which are bigger.
They then tried putting it in gear, and using the starter to release the brakes, but no luck here either. Cue a lot of head scratching.
Now in the past, when I had my flat, I have just used a trolley jack to move it about in the garage. That said, back then my driveway and garage were level. Not any more. My drive now has a 30 degree slope (minimum), made out of broken concrete. Stuff it, I don't carer now, I am on a mission, and this car is going tonight.
Now the plan was to trolley it back to the point of no return (almost), and then put it back on it's wheels, and see if a bit of gravity and a manly shove would get it moving. Ideally with someone in the car, operating the brakes. A suitably cunning plan then.
So, I am standing behind the car, pulling on the jack, and the other two are pushing from the front. Just as I am about to shout stop, it was off. Flipping heck. This car has never accelerated so fast in it's life. I have leapt up, and am clinging onto the luggage rack for dear life, surfing down the drive at what feels like 50 miles an hour. We shoot out of the drive, straight across the road, the jack hits the curb, which dumps the car back on the wheels, and we slide to a stop on the grass. Well, the car does, I get shot off the back into the nettles.
It might have been an idea to check the way was clear of cars and pedestrians before starting really, but luckily there was no one about.
After that, it was plain sailing. All the excitement had released the brakes, and so off it went to the great scrappy. All that remains are a set of parallel grooves carved into the drive way and road by the wheels of my trolley jack as evidence it ever happened.
A quick re mounting of the garage door, and off to watch strictly on the dvd player with a restorative Stella or two.
I found a company through the inter web who would come and remove it and scrap it for free, and all was set for last night. (In theory you can get money for scrap cars, but it often doesn't work out like that, and this was simple, apparently, and painless too). So I pumped up the tyres, and took it off the stands before they arrived. I tried to see if it would roll, but despite having the brakes backed off during storage, no chance. Jacked it back up, front wheels ok, rear wheels a no.
I opened up the garage door in readiness. Now this hasn't been opened for 10 years either, and so after a lot of kicking, and beating with a large hammer, it flies open, drops of the rails and lands on top of the car, nearly taking my head off in the process.
So the guys turn up, with what appears to be an AA van. It has a winch to pull it out of the garage, and a hoist which can pick up the front wheels. I figure we can use the winch to pull it out of the garage, but they won't try this as there is no towing point, and they are unwilling to try attaching it anywhere else (like looping it round the back axle). They suggest starting it with a booster, but I wasn't convinced, and subsequently proved right. Amazingly there was still petrol in it, but the petrol pump had died. So no joy there.
I suggested backing the truck up the drive, and using the hoist, but no, they weren't confident their truck would fit up the drive. Odd, as I have had skip lorries up there before, which are bigger.
They then tried putting it in gear, and using the starter to release the brakes, but no luck here either. Cue a lot of head scratching.
Now in the past, when I had my flat, I have just used a trolley jack to move it about in the garage. That said, back then my driveway and garage were level. Not any more. My drive now has a 30 degree slope (minimum), made out of broken concrete. Stuff it, I don't carer now, I am on a mission, and this car is going tonight.
Now the plan was to trolley it back to the point of no return (almost), and then put it back on it's wheels, and see if a bit of gravity and a manly shove would get it moving. Ideally with someone in the car, operating the brakes. A suitably cunning plan then.
So, I am standing behind the car, pulling on the jack, and the other two are pushing from the front. Just as I am about to shout stop, it was off. Flipping heck. This car has never accelerated so fast in it's life. I have leapt up, and am clinging onto the luggage rack for dear life, surfing down the drive at what feels like 50 miles an hour. We shoot out of the drive, straight across the road, the jack hits the curb, which dumps the car back on the wheels, and we slide to a stop on the grass. Well, the car does, I get shot off the back into the nettles.
It might have been an idea to check the way was clear of cars and pedestrians before starting really, but luckily there was no one about.
After that, it was plain sailing. All the excitement had released the brakes, and so off it went to the great scrappy. All that remains are a set of parallel grooves carved into the drive way and road by the wheels of my trolley jack as evidence it ever happened.
A quick re mounting of the garage door, and off to watch strictly on the dvd player with a restorative Stella or two.
