# Help - Best Man Speech!



## surefire (Aug 22, 2011)

I have the (dubious) honour of being the best man at one of my friends weddings soon.

I think I've got most of what I need to do sussed, but I just need to sort out the speech now. 

Can anyone recommend any good books or other resources (web sites maybe) with advice on how to compose the speech?
I'm not looking for pre-made jokes etc. 
There are plenty of sites I have seen with dodgy jokes, which isn't really my style. What I really want is something that shows how to structure the speech and what kind of content to include.

Any recommendations?

Cheers


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## AuburnWarrior (Aug 22, 2011)

I was best man about six years ago.  I'd known the bloke for about 15 years (we'd grown up together) so I simply regailed our first meeting, some funny stories that we'd been involved in along the way and finished by saying what a lovely bloke he was and that there'd always be a place for him in my life.

The next year we stopped speaking to each other....


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## granters (Aug 22, 2011)

get horrifically drunk and sing.

That's what i did, still not heard the last of it


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## Mick47 (Aug 22, 2011)

google "best man speech" you'll find more material than you can use.


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## Atticus_Finch (Aug 22, 2011)

I used this site as a rough guide when I did it a few years back. I didn't copy any particular speech, but it gave me plenty of ideas.

http://www.hitched.co.uk/wedding-speeches/example_best-man_speeches_1/


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## birdieman (Aug 22, 2011)

You don't need any structure, just keep it short and don't make it endless tales of what a clique of you, the groom and a couple of others got up to over the years, it needs to be appreciated by everyone there. 
People want to drink and chat at weddings, not listen to you, sorry. They they will NOT appreciate any speech going past 10 minutes.
No-one expects you to be like a professional comic, just give them a couple of anecdotes and a couple of jokes and say how nice the bride looks...job done.


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## surefire (Aug 23, 2011)

Thanks for the tips.

I wasn't planning an epic speech, or anything like that, as I realsie the day is not about me, plus there is nothing worse than a forced speech completely out of character of the speaker, with unatural jokes.

I am just aware there are certain things that are supposed to be in the speech. Such as thanking the groom for his toast on behalf of the bridesmaids etc.. I just wanted to make sure I didn't miss anything important like this.


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## CallawayKid (Aug 23, 2011)

Don't, I repeat DON'T call his new wife by his ex-girlfriend's name...this goes down like a bacon sandwich at a bar mitzvarh!

 

CK


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## ADB (Aug 23, 2011)

Its a bit of a thankless task if i'm honest. Along with all the previous advice just keep it short, dont refer to any 'in' jokes, complement the bride and i found a visual aid useful - bit corny but found an old school photo of the groom and blew it up to A2 size. Got the biggest laugh and was a talking point afterwards!! 

Good luck and try to enjoy the experience.


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## 19thagain (Aug 23, 2011)

One little tip is to think of your speech as a box, sub divided into four and each of the four areas are to be addressed during the speech.

This offers a structure to allow the areas to be covered and the speech can then be padded/made brief to order, but always the next area is known.
An example of headers could be....

1/ Self when asked and all the opportunities this offered.
2/ The main point re the groom and the jokes
3/ The bride and her family and his 'good' luck
4/ Their future and the possible loss of your best pal to the Fairy Liquid.

Cheers and enjoy the boozy day .. but not until after the speech!!


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## GB72 (Aug 23, 2011)

My only advice would be to keep it short, simple and heartfelt. The simple fact is that very few of us are actually as funny as we like to think we are and we cannot pull off speaches like they do in the movies. 

A funny annecdote or 2 is fine but the main job is to thank everyone, say how wonderful the wedding party are looking, compliment the bride every couple of lines, that sort of thing. 

If you are telling any stories, it is often a good idea to run them past the bride or groom first. The last thing you want is to bring up something they would rather forget as it may be funny to others but be a sore point to the person in question.


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## bladeplayer (Aug 23, 2011)

My only advice would be to keep it short, simple and heartfelt. The simple fact is that very few of us are actually as funny as we like to think we are and we cannot pull off speaches like they do in the movies. 

A funny annecdote or 2 is fine but the main job is to thank everyone, say how wonderful the wedding party are looking, compliment the bride every couple of lines, that sort of thing. 

If you are telling any stories, it is often a good idea to run them past the bride or groom first. The last thing you want is to bring up something they would rather forget as it may be funny to others but be a sore point to the person in question.
		
Click to expand...

 GB sums it up in a nutshell , be complimentary , dont try to be funny or smart , thank the guests for been part of the B&G special day . compliment the bride & bridesmaids etc,thank the groom for asking you to be his best man as ye have been friends for years  (i take it you have )& its an honour to be part of their big day ..   thank the hotel & invite everyony to have a great day & evening  & have fun .. simples , last thing guests or the B&G was is you to make a plonker of yourself ..  oh & toast the bride & groom ..then sit down shut up & drink loads


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## sawtooth (Aug 23, 2011)

I'm best man for one of my brothers soon.

Having been best man before for a mate ages ago I didnt jump at the chance this time. Not being a keen speaker I asked my brother if he would write the speech for me and I would just read it out. Thats what I will do - hopefully work out alright.


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## johnboywalton (Aug 23, 2011)

My wife is one of eleven, so i have been to a fair few family weddings!
I think that the best speeches are fairly simple and genuine, not too long buy not too short.I know it is not that easy but i think the delivery is very important, try and be calm and as everyone has mentioned make sure you thank all the right people........Good luck


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## surefire (Aug 24, 2011)

Thanks for all the advice everyone.

I think I've got it mostly sorted now. My draft speech is written, so I'm just going to practise it, and refine it as I practice, if I think something doesn't sound quite right.

I've got the thank yous and compliments in there, and a couple of stories about growing up with the groom. Nothing terrible that will cause humiliation, but still funny and perhaps slightly embarrassing, in the way that typical teenage hijinks are, rather than sordid tales of exs, strippers and other such topics.

From looking online, there are plenty of sites with 'advice' but it all seems so very fake. Just seems to be generic jokes, which are funny to read online, but probably not funny in the speech, especially as they are not sincere and sound completely out of character.
If anyone else will be doing a best man speech in the future, I think the advice in this thread is far more useful* than most of the sites that come up from a google search.

*I may change my mind after actually delivering the speech!


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## sawtooth (Aug 29, 2011)

I did my speech on Saturday, by all accounts it went down OK.

All 3 of us had our speeches written down so that would be the best advice I could give you. If you rehearse well you will find that you will be speaking and looking at the audience more with just the occasional glance at what is written down. It will be more natural and people will have a better chance of hearing you as well.

Good Luck you will be fine.

PS. A few pints of Guiness helps as well


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