The psychology of competitive golf - question for the mid to low h'cappers

[Doon frae Troon]

One year I played with a new member in our club 4BBB KO. I was off 4 and he was in his first year playing off about 18. In the first round we were drawn against two high handicappers and we both played the early holes like hackers to be six down after seven holes.
My partner must have felt like you Paul. He was so wrapped up in the other three players that he could not play his own game.
On the 8th tee he was nearly in tears and apologising for letting me down.

The early holes on the course were easier and playing down wind. From the eighth the next five holes were tough and into the wind. I said to my partner that if he could get a five [nett 4] on the eigth we would win the match. He thought I was joking but I told him I was deadly serious. He played for a five and holed a putt for a four. I won the 9th SI 1 with a birdie and we won the match 2/1. We also went on to win the cup.

Moral of the story....sod the others and play your own game.

 

[Hobbit]

Thank you for all the replies. There have been some very interesting and useful comments made.

One theme I've picked up on is 'I don't mind as long as they're good company...'

If a bad golfer has a very light-hearted approach to their poor play, how do you view this? Is it a case of thinking that at least they can enjoy themselves or are you left thinking that, perhaps, they are not taking things seriously enough?

If someone is lighthearted about their game, that's their choice... just so long as they're not dancing down the fairway in a clown's outfit whistling Dixie.

Its only a game.

 

[chrisd]

Bladeplayer

I understand your sentiments but what papyt is advocating isn't really within the spirit of the game. OK, he's not breaking any rules but he is also not endearing himself to his playing partners or fellow members. Golf clubs are relatively small organisations, word and reputations spread quickly. There is a guy at my club who is now on his FOURTH club in the area because he basically acts in the manner that papyt advocates. He will be leaving soon because he is finding it harder and harder to get a game.

To be fair the rules don't come into it - he is just acting like a prima donna and if he talked to most of the guys that I play with in the way he writes on here he would end end trying to extricate his provisional ball from up his jacksy!

 

[AuburnWarrior]

I really wouldn't worry about it fella. We've all started somewhere.
Hopefully, the low handicappers that you play with will be nice people who will make the round enjoyable nonetheless.

Anyway, it's not unheard of for a low handicapper to knob one off the tee.... :lol:

 

[HomerJSimpson]

why is it unacceptable,why should my chances in the comp. be jeopardized by constantly looking for balls other players have hit into trouble, and how many on here have got fed up because of it,selfish,probably,but who is more selfish the high h/c hacker who doesn't take the comp. seriously and is just out for a game and a laugh and banter knowing dam well they will not win but doesnt care if he drags his playing partners game down,the worst offenders are the ones who lash at the ball with the driver carve it miles left/right ,laugh and then ask you did you see were my ball went !!!!!!!!!

there is a time and place to learn that is what social golf is for NOT in the monthly medal,stableford is normally more relaxed and i have stated in the past if a player cant score on a hole i tell them to pick up as its not a practice round is it,and who says i should be teaching the high h/c player anything in the middle of a comp. as i originally stated social golf and competitive golf are two different beasts and should be treated differently social golf ,laugh, joke banter etc, competitive golf focus on your own game and don't let others bring you down.

Sorry but these two posts are very sad. Most high handicappers I know go out and try their best in comp rounds. Strange as it sounds some golfers can actually combine trying to play well with being sociable. I'm sure you must have been apoplectic watching the Masters to see Sergio and Rory having fun.

I find your attitude elitist and you seem to be saying don't play with me if you can't keep it on the course. Naturally I'm sure you never have to reach for a provisional. I hpe you wouldn't take that attitude out on a GM Forum meet too. Personally I'm not too posh to help anyone look for their ball even in the middle of a great round like I had (in my own less esteemed world than yours). Do to others as you would like done to you. Give and take in other words

 

[mahseve]

thanks for the compliment im 54.

54? Suprised you lived so long with your attitude. Tallpaul, take no notice of him, there's some great advise in this thread. You will occasionally meet testostorone driven golfers to whom winning is all, smile at them knowing who sleeps better.
To be naughty, low handicap players who are so wrapped up in themselves and their winning are often the easiest to subject to gamesmanship and psyching. You'll learn! Enjoy the game and the company.

 

[bluewolf]

I'm quite happy to play with anyone who hits a bad shot, I'll politely refuse to play with anyone who has a bad attitude. I'm sorry Papyt, but I wouldn't play with you twice if you behaved as you have stated you would. I'm sad to say that you're not the only person I've met who has this same arrogant egocentric attitude. You are in a massive minority though.

To the OP, just remember that every one of the low handicappers you ever play with has been in exactly the same position as you, and the attitudes that they experienced probably influenced the way they behave.

 

[jammydodger]

As a 'lapsed' lowish h/c (3) I feel there's a lot of good stuff on this thread. If I was playing with a higher h/c in a comp then i'd try to be as respectful to them as i'd expect them to be for me. What I mean by that is not rolling your eyes when they knob it into the kack , looking for their balls when offline , having a nice chat as you stroll along enjoying the fresh air , compliment them on some part of their game that is working well and not bringing up the negatives. I know they will be a little nervous of playing with me so make them feel comfortable from the start which in turn will help the pace of play and not slow things down. this will all help the day go smoother for for all concerned.
If they hit a bad one I would make a point of saying to forget it its gone and to make the next one count.

To Papyt :- you're taking your competitive golf far too seriously and it looks like you're trying far too hard when in a comp. Relax , its only a medal in a small club in the uk , you're not playing for a living so its so rediculously insignificant. When do get a chance during the round to switch off and have a chat or smell the flowers and enjoy the wildlife ? Jeez after 4 hours you must go home with such a headache.

 

[papyt]

I'm quite happy to play with anyone who hits a bad shot, I'll politely refuse to play with anyone who has a bad attitude. I'm sorry Pappy, but I wouldn't play with you twice if you behaved as you have stated you would. I'm sad to say that you're not the only person I've met who has this same arrogant egocentric attitude. You are in a massive minority though.

To the OP, just remember that every one of the low handicappers you ever play with has been in exactly the same position as you, and the attitudes that they experienced probably influenced the way they behave.

bluewolf,how would you react if in the club championship you were paired with the chap your having trouble with at your club and he was constantly talking rubbish,laughing and joking and generally putting you off your game?

 

[bladeplayer]

Bladeplayer

I understand your sentiments but what papyt is advocating isn't really within the spirit of the game. OK, he's not breaking any rules but he is also not endearing himself to his playing partners or fellow members. Golf clubs are relatively small organisations, word and reputations spread quickly. There is a guy at my club who is now on his FOURTH club in the area because he basically acts in the manner that papyt advocates. He will be leaving soon because he is finding it harder and harder to get a game.

Dont think endearing himself to others is his aim tho mate, he works hard (sorry for assuming) to get his subs , he chooses to use his free time to play serious golf & it well within his right to .. as i say i agree its (moraly or what ever we wana call it wrong)but he plays golf in a serious way & its his choice ..

Im totaly in your court or course on this one & its great to hear so many low handicappers on here that are willing to play with high handicappers (myself included) , one of my regular playing partners is a 23 handicapper . a mate asked me to play in a classic 2 weeks ago, with him a 20 & a 21&19 handicapper , i jumped at the chance ..
was a lovely round of golf ..
I have a mate/ in law off 5 who has the same attitude & i tell ya it stinks , but all papyt did was be honest in his reply , gota respect that even if we dont agree ,,

 

[Doon frae Troon]

bluewolf,how would you react if in the club championship you were paired with the chap your having trouble with at your club and he was constantly talking rubbish,laughing and joking and generally putting you off your game?

Papyt
Trevino did this for many years, not to many folk had a bad word for him.
Perhaps you need to focus and concentrate harder on your own game rather than take umbridge at what your partner is doing.

 

[bluewolf]

bluewolf,how would you react if in the club championship you were paired with the chap your having trouble with at your club and he was constantly talking rubbish,laughing and joking and generally putting you off your game?

To be honest, if I was paired with him, I would explain before we teed off that I expect him to avoid any sort of conversation whilst playing. If he continued to annoy me I would hope that I would be strong enough mentally to be able to ignore him. I WOULD still assist him in looking for his ball, even though, inside I would be quite happy to see him lose miserably. It's one of the positives of golf over other "sports". The requirement to be the person your kids would like you to be.

As a side note, I would like to apologise for intimating that you were arrogant and egocentric. I don't like petty squabbles on t'interweb. A few too many pints of Landlord last night.

 

[Foxholer]

i tend to give shots in matches at our club

Which means that it if often the case that the higher players will get quite a good loead on me / us in the front 9.
i dont mind.
i know that statistically they will have bad holes. if they start having them on the back 9 then that's good because they will then feel the pressure and again statistically their game will suffer under pressure. if they dont, well good on them and well done. but more often than not they dont.

It's amazing how often high handicap players "aplologise" for their good play . Far be it for me to tell them it might actually be due to them playing well - if they want to talk themselves out of playing well, that's up to them

My thoughts exactly!

 

[papyt]

To be honest, if I was paired with him, I would explain before we teed off that I expect him to avoid any sort of conversation whilst playing. If he continued to annoy me I would hope that I would be strong enough mentally to be able to ignore him. I WOULD still assist him in looking for his ball, even though, inside I would be quite happy to see him lose miserably. It's one of the positives of golf over other "sports". The requirement to be the person your kids would like you to be.

As a side note, I would like to apologise for intimating that you were arrogant and egocentric. I don't like petty squabbles on t'interweb. A few too many pints of Landlord last night.

apology accepted,they way you feel against that chap is unfortunately how i feel in most comps.i am polite and courteous BUT i tend not to talk as i am engrossed in my own game and cant see competition golf the same as a social game,probably comes from years of boxing ( no not the brain damage )

 

[USER1999]

When a ball gets hit into the woods, how do you know it won't be found? I have looked for ages to find a ball 6" off the fairway, and I have walked into the jungle, and found it straight away. You can't possibly look at a tee shot, and say with any certainty that it will or won't be found.

So you go look for it. It's the done thing.

Equally, I can't concentrate for 4 hours plus. No one can. Concentration has to be switched on and off. This is what pre shot routines are for. 4 hours of being focused, solely on shooting a score is time wasted when you could be enjoying yourself. In a round of golf, you only need to be switched on for about 15 minutes. The rest is just walking, or standing about.

 

[HomerJSimpson]

When a ball gets hit into the woods, how do you know it won't be found? I have looked for ages to find a ball 6" off the fairway, and I have walked into the jungle, and found it straight away. You can't possibly look at a tee shot, and say with any certainty that it will or won't be found.

So you go look for it. It's the done thing.

Equally, I can't concentrate for 4 hours plus. No one can. Concentration has to be switched on and off. This is what pre shot routines are for. 4 hours of being focused, solely on shooting a score is time wasted when you could be enjoying yourself. In a round of golf, you only need to be switched on for about 15 minutes. The rest is just walking, or standing about.

Totally agree. Speak to any tour professional or read any good book (Rotella, Pelz et al) and they all say the same thing. You have to switch off between shots.