Quitting - What do you do to pick yourself up?

[RGDave]

Hmm, the great JOuk feeling down?

I blow very hot and cold most of the year excluding the summer. I made it to the 12th hole t'other day on a reasonable score (5 over gross), got really depressed about a double on the next (not making a double, but the way I did it) and then had endless bogeys with not a decent shot in sight. I short-sided myself on a par 4 and needed to get up and down to be in with a shout. I duffed the (albeit) difficult short pitch - I played the risky shot as it was matchplay. I proceeded to throw my toys out of the pram. Why? because I have expectations of myself and can't separate my expectations from the reality (sh** happens). I'm playing tomorrow and have told myself not to get wound up. I know I'll do it, but I tend not need 48 hours or so to get with the programme!!

Best to take the good and bad in the same way...they are both imposters. 6 over one day, 16 over the next....neither is a true reflection of my general ability....

It's work in progress t.b.h. (my mental state) - I quit for the best part of a decade and regretted it. I shan't do that again.

It strikes me that you have high standards, you spend a lot of time thinking/analysing and harbour dreams of playing as you have in the past, which we know about.

Chin up. We need you on here for starters.

 

[HomerJSimpson]

Get out there you miserable old tart. Get out and hit it round the course and forget scores. Forget the bad un's and love the good un's. If you are really feeling that disillusioned then leave the clubs alone completely for a while.

However I will try and put it in some perspective. I had to pull out of the monthly medal today as I had a call yesterday to get myself up to Wimbledon as one of my best mates is in a hospice and unlikely to see out the weekend. Much bigger crisies in the world than whether you should play or not. It could be worse. You could have me as a regular partner.

 

[ScienceBoy]

I came into this year wanting to try the game I dabbled in as a youth and have only dabbled in for the last 7 years, until March.

At many points this year I felt like giving up due to being unable to meet my expectations. When this happened, it has done twice, I took a two week break. I followed that break with a lesson and a few range sessions, my latest one has turned from shooting high 90s to shooting 84 twice in a fortnight. I feel my game is the best it has ever been.

The moral of the story is "Lessons", the break to get bitten by the bug again, as does doing a bit of team play so you concentrate on different things.

 

[Tiger]

Really sorry to hear you are not enjoying your golf. I suppose when you can play as well as you can the frustration of under performance must be massive. Not sure I can offer much advice really but what I would ask is what did you used to enjoy about golf? Is it just the fact that you aren't playing to your potential or is it the game itself? It sounds like you might be feeling down about how your playing but can't motivate yourself to do the practice you need to get back on song.

If you didn't play golf what would you do instead? Would you be moping about or doing something else. Maybe a break will help. Whatever you decide to do I hope you'll stay on here (someone needs to give smiffy stick)

Hope you find your mojo soon.

 

[richart]

This is one subject that i do feel qualified to comment on.

I know i like to have a humorous comment on most subjects, and am not adverse to the odd wind up (Stack and Tilt !), but that in a way is how i now treat my golf.

I played a lot as a kid and did get to a reasonable standard. I was very competitive and didn't mind who i played with, as i was basically just concentrating on my game, and looking to improve.

I then gave up the game like a lot of people for a while, when they start working and having a family. Decided to play again my other childhood love, tennis, and until i developed chronic tennis elbow, played most days, just for the sheer enjoyment. Met new friends and without putting any pressure on myself became quite good. I just loved playing the game,and the banter on and off the court.

Was so disappointed not to be able to carry on playing, but decided to have another go at golf, as i found i could swing albeit in a slightly restricted way. Basically hadn't played for 30 years, but i started again with the same intentions as when i took up tennis again. I was just going to enjoy the golf, meet some new friends, and take it from there.

I was not going to play in competitions and get stuck with bores who wouldn't talk for hours. I became a SOCIAL golfer, wasn't worried about my scores as i knew i would never get to the standard i was as a kid. Played in the roll up every Saturday, soon met some good people, and now am happy to play in competitions with them. Still very rarely play in drawn comnpetitions as i just don't enjoy them.

There is a point to this i promise

I play golf on my terms, not to get better, but to ENJOY a great game. It just happens i have suddenly got better after a couple of years. With practice i think could get lower again, but it will never happen. I am not about to hit the practice ground, or play more serious competitions because i don't enjoy that.

Everyone is different, and you have to find a away to enjoy YOUR game. My big regret was that it took me so long to realise how to enjoy my game, and i wasted all the years i didn't play. A rest may be a short term solution, but if you can't find a way to enjoy your golf you haven't tried hard enough !

Oh and by the way i am looking forward to playing in some forum meets, but if you all turn out to be boring old farts, with no sense of humour, you want see me for dust

 

[kid2]

Oh and by the way i am looking forward to playing in some forum meets, but if you all turn out to be boring old farts, with no sense of humour, you want see me for dust

Nor me....haha
Id love to get over to meet all on here at some stage......Seeing as its dominated for the most part by the U.K.........We're gonna have to come over from here and show ye how to have some Craic!

 

[birdieman]

Simple, if you're not enjoying it just stop and do other things. You don't owe golf anything. If your enthusiasm returns start again.
My golf enthusiasm comes and goes depending on what else is happening in life. It's not the be all and end all.

Put the clubs away for a few months.

 

[pokerjoke]

Oh and by the way i am looking forward to playing in some forum meets, but if you all turn out to be boring old farts, with no sense of humour, you want see me for dust

Nor me....haha
Id love to get over to meet all on here at some stage......Seeing as its dominated for the most part by the U.K.........We're gonna have to come over from here and show ye how to have some Craic!

Please bring some of your real guiness over please,my club sells the most tasteless pint ever,ta

 

[Farneyman]

Truth be known i was loosing the desire to play for various reasons......Injuries were taking longer to heal, I wasnt getting as excited to be going training.....Match's werent as enjoyable and i wasnt looking forward to them like i used to.....Frustration with other players on the pitch was sneaking in with me........

Thats just you getting old and expecting the same from the other guys as yo gave

Some great advice in the rest of the post. It kinda covers what I said .. you need to want to play and enjoy it.

 

[kid2]

Oh and by the way i am looking forward to playing in some forum meets, but if you all turn out to be boring old farts, with no sense of humour, you want see me for dust

Nor me....haha
Id love to get over to meet all on here at some stage......Seeing as its dominated for the most part by the U.K.........We're gonna have to come over from here and show ye how to have some Craic!

Please bring some of your real guiness over please,my club sells the most tasteless pint ever,ta

No bother PJ.....ill even try get one of them Pint Glass's that keep the head on the pint for you

 

[kid2]

The problem with me Fabian is the Leg packed in but my mind was saying not too.....
I wouldnt have found golf otherwise though thank god

 

[JT77]

Just one,

stop beating your self up mate, I am actully looking forward to some time off from the game too, and now is a good time, as we are coming into winter, the dark nights and bad weather, all in all, its not a bad time to have a break!!
I am finding it harder to motivate myself to get to the ramge etc, but mainly because I know that the season is almost done.
Chin up, I am sure you will find that yourself getting excited again after several weeks without hitting a ball!

 

[HomerJSimpson]

I'm looking forward to some time off too. Only practicing once a week and with the competitive diary stripped down over the winter much more time to enjoy social golf with my usual Saturday crowd with no expectations to perform. I'm having four lessons over the winter (until March) starting on Thursday and so won't be getting overly wrapped up in technique. It's about finding a swing that works, getting out as much as the weather allows and trying to oofer as few balls to the golfing gods as I can. Everything else will be a bonus

 

[JustOne]

Hmm, the great JOuk feeling down?

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Funny!


I have feelings too.... I need chocolate!

It's been a funny and exceptional year, joined a club that I hardly play, play courses I've never seen using a swing that I don't practice... and expect miracles. Frankly I'm surprised I can even get the club on the ball sometimes (although it does normally come down with a leaf attached to it!)

I'm trying to persuade myself that 2011 is going to rock! Maybe an iPod and a thermos would help me through the Winter.

Just feeling blue... perhaps there's a storm coming

 

[Smiffy]

Play with a new guy whos good, but doesnt say much.

In other words "don't play with Smiffy anymore"
I get it.
I'm hurt. Deeply.

 

[CrapHacker]

I have feelings too....

No you don't - you use S&T ffs.

The only thing wrong with your golf is you don't have enough money.

You have to work for a living to pay the bills which A) doesn't leave enough spare cash to play away games all year B) doesn't leave enough time to pop down the road and play 9 holes as often as you'd like.

Also being a lazy bugger who doesn't want to practise like wot you did when you were a teenager doesn't help with the planned improvement.

You know you're good enough to be scratch. But it involves more time and effort than you are willing/able to put into it. Or rather, you think you may be good enough, but are frustrated coz you wont ever be sure how good you really can be.

Enough of the physcobabble for the time being ??

Maybe you should quit Copthorne and join East Sussex if it would get you playing more medals.

 

[vig]

Who's Nathanial???

FFS James, If you've managed to play with Smiffy and he doesn't talk, you could sell your secret for millions.

You need a meet where you can have a good blow out, unfortunately, you just missed one. Blathered in Berwick is the order of the day if you want to forget about your woes.

Take a break buddy and come back refreshed for next season.

 

[Leftie]

Hmm, the great JOuk feeling down?

I have feelings too....

You miserable git Percy.

If you aren't enjoying the game because of the company you keep, then play with other people.

If you aren't enjoying the game 'cos you're not hitting the shots you know you can hit, then get a bit of practice in (what is it now? About 2 hours so far this year?)

If you can't be ar3ed to practice, then just accept the good and bad shots in the round, lighten up and stop feeling sorry for yourself

So, do you want my old trolley or not?

 

[JustOne]

Who's Nathanial???

It's a running joke, apparently it's OK if we call each other any name we fancy because Smiffy can't remember names very well. I'm Percy today, Leftie is Orson, AuburnWarrior is Debbie and Smiffy is Mary!

FFS James, If you've managed to play with Smiffy and he doesn't talk, you could sell your secret for millions.

You've read it wrong, I like the banter, it's the fun part of a round and I'd never compain about that. I've not met a single person from the forum who isn't a top fella to play golf with. When I joined my club I thought I was going to play in loads of rounds where I had a h/cap card in my hand and stand on the practice ground for several hours per week, that hasn't really happened this year, my fault.

 

[viscount17]

one of the things a couple of us were speaking about at Goswick was the prospect of you, Screwback and Easengrace playing together. Having seen all three of you, and playing with two, it would the ultimate forum long ball game.

you just need a new challenge.