Most Embarrasing moment

[Khamelion]

I'll open with:-

It's 1986, I'm 17 and its the first time away on holiday without the parents and 4 school mates head to Blackpool for the week. Out on the town, shirt buttoned up to high, lovely polyester and viscose material trousers, white slip on shoes, looking the mutz nutz, no a proper knob looking back now.

We head to the night club, have a couple of drinks, survey the scene looking for who we could impress with our dancing, targets spotted, on to the dance floor, seeing who could dance the best.

I went for the full Travolta, little spin, short run up and a slide to perfection on my knees across the dance floor stopping right in front of the ladies, they had to be impressed.

I stood up saw them put their hands to their mouths, they were very impressed, did another little spin and danced back to the other three, who just fell about laughing.

Then I felt a burning sensation, my knees were on fire, I looked down at my knees and could see two red, skinned and bleeding slightly knee caps through two neatly melted holes in the polyester and viscose mix trousers I had on.

Fun times.

 

[Crazyface]

Pub full, singer in full cry. I spotted a girl from work out with some girlfriends. I mooched on over and sat down at their table and started to work my magic. To this day I actually don't know how it happened , but I slid off the stool I was sat on and sommersaulted backwards away from the table they were at. I got up and sat back down and didn't blink and carried on chatting. I saw here the next day and she told me how she and her mates were impressed at how coolly I'd sat back down and carried on chatting with them. I have no idea how I didn't go bright red and just walk out on that occasion as that is what I would have usually done.

 

[Doon frae Troon]

I was about 12 years old and in the audience for the Scouts Christmas show.

They called for a volunteer for the next act and my pals dad, the local scoutmaster, coerced me to be it.
Village hall was packed, about 200 locals.

The skit was a poem about trees with some of the Scouts scattered about on stage playing types of trees.
I was told to keep running around the trees, causing some amount of giggling, whilst the fairly solemn poem was read out.

Final line of the poem was......'and all year round the sap keeps running through the trees'.
I died.

 

[Deleted member 18645]

Admitting to someone that I knew Homer.

 

[Wilson]

Aged about 11 I went to a basketball match, off I popped to get some chips during the game, as I walked back to my seat, someone shouted, "give us a chip", I looked up to see who it was - tripped over the first step up to the stand and threw the chips everywhere, much to everyone's delight!

 

[Tashyboy]

Went to a new pub called copper Beech, half way through the night it's time to have a number one. Walks into the toilet and had a look around and no standing up latrines. I thought this is proper posh. Anyway number one became a rather vocal number two. A few people came in and out during the performance. When I was finished, I was washing my hands and on the wall is a coin operated machine selling all kinds of ladies sanitary wear. About ten seconds later I thought crap. The penny had dropped.
I thought I bet no one has noticed. Walked out of the ladies and the whole pub erupted. Juvenile idiots the lot of them.
Suffice to say, I have not learned my lesson, it's not the only time I have done it.

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

Me and mate Mike were the Captain's 'trump card' foursomes pairing in the companies main inter-site comp - being played at Royal Birkdale one year. As we wandered up the 18th (hangovers from the previous night session just about clearing) we saw the Captain standing behind the green - eagerly waiting to hear of our 36 stableford points to clinch the trophy. We wondered how we were going to explain our 17...and it wasn't as if RB was playing tough that day...

And just me? Playing with a member of the R&A and two members of the New Club - nearly doing an air shot on the 1st Tee at The Old Course. It went about 15yds - at least it cleared the tee. I then proceeded to hit it straight out of bounds.

 

[Beezerk]

Went to a new pub called copper Beech, half way through the night it's time to have a number one. Walks into the toilet and had a look around and no standing up latrines. I thought this is proper posh. Anyway number one became a rather vocal number two. A few people came in and out during the performance. When I was finished, I was washing my hands and on the wall is a coin operated machine selling all kinds of ladies sanitary wear. About ten seconds later I thought crap. The penny had dropped.
I thought I bet no one has noticed. Walked out of the ladies and the whole pub erupted. Juvenile idiots the lot of them.
Suffice to say, I have not learned my lesson, it's not the only time I have done it.

I was on a train from Chester le Street to Newcastle a few years ago, the missus and I had been to a test match and I was pretty much rat @rsed.
The train was rammed but as we'd waited that long I was dying for a slash, I managed to get into the toilet and have a refresher, kind of leaning against the wall as you do. I turned around upon finishing and the door was wide open with half the train looking at me, I'd accidentally leant against the "open door" button while I'd been piddling. I think I was too drunk to be embarrassed :cheers:

 

[ManinBlack]

Many years ago, as I was stepping forward to receive the second nett prize on Captain's Day, I remembered the ball out of bounds I'd had at the sixth. Neither the guy who had marked my card nor I had thought of it until I'd said to him "pity about the OOB at 6". I had to hand the prize back while giving a garbled reason for doing so.

 

[Deleted Member 1156]

I was about 14 years old and on a very busy train, standing at the end of the carriage where the doors are. Leaning on the opposite wall facing me was a woman about 30 ish with the most enormous pair I had ever seen in my young life. As the train came into a station and the brakes went on, I lurched forward off balance and put both hands out to stop myself.

I'm sure you can guess where they made contact with her Fortunately, she saw the funny side!