Funny things the pro says..

[vkurup]

When I started golf a few years ago, i took some lessons with my local pro.. He is a great guy and has been around for a while. Starting at the wrong side of 35, I was hopefully that I will have all the skills from my years of playing cricket to hit the ball well. After learning the basics of the swing, I absolutely nailed my SportsDirect Dunlop driver past the 100y mark. I had arrived!!!.

After admiring my 'drive', i turned to him and asked,
Me: 'What do you think, do you think I can be on tour someday?'
Pro: Sure.. <pause> on the table tennis tour..
<tumbleweed>

Cracked up laughing.... and I still remember those memorable words..

Anyone got any funnies from their Pros?

 

[virtuocity]

"It looks like you're hitting way from the inside, because you don't shift your weight on the backswing, try to get back on your right foot"

*shank*
*shank*
*shank*

"A wee bit more rotation and wrist cock should help"

*shank*
*shank*
*shank*

"Yep, you're getting it"

*shank*
*shank*
*shank*

"Right, that's time up. We're doing a special offer on courses of lessons at the moment. It's normally £70 per half hour, but I can do you 5 for £250. Are you interested?"

Trump Turnberry.

 

[DCB]

Our Pro told one of his pupils to go on up and warm up by hitting balls into the net. We have two large practice nets in the practice area. Upon arriving up to start his lesson he found the pupil facing 180° in the wrong direction and happily hitting balls down into the large netting that provides protection for the clubhouse terrace from errant shots on the 18th hole.

 

[Doon frae Troon]

After a playing lesson the Pro asked my then 13 year old daughter what her handicap was.

3 came the reply.

'My god you must be one hell of a golfer to play off 3.
[Silence for a moment]
....because your course management and thinking is more like 23.'

 

[Capella]

Our birdie book has little tips on how to approach a hole. On our sixth hole, our pro wrote:
"You have two options here: lay up to the water or hit a long drive over it. Don't try to combine the two."

 

[USER1999]

The stroke saver for Ardglass golf club has this gem about the first hole.

Aim right, you have the whole of Ireland to aim at.

For those that don't know it, left on that hole is in the sea.

 

[USER1999]

My coach says if I'm not shanking it, then I'm doing it wrong?

 

[GB72]

Mate was testing drivers at the range and praying them all over shop. After trying half a dozen he asked the pro what he would recommend. 'a 3 wood' was the reply

 

[Slab]

"I'm not the best teaching pro in the world... but I am in the top 3 !"

 

[User 105]

When I went for the first lesson with a new pro he got me to hit a few shots then asked me What my playing handicap was. When I said I was off 12 he said "Wow, that's some accomplishment with that swing"

Cheeky git.

 

[patricks148]

a mate was interested in a new Titleist 915 3 wood, so asked the difference between the F and the FD...

"ones got a D on it" was his reply, classic

 

[HawkeyeMS]

During my first lesson at Blackmoor Steve described me as "Having the swing of a 20 handicapper, possibly worse" and that I would be "an interesting project".

He also stood and watched me hit about 10 balls, which weren't great but I didn't think we're too bad and then said "You pretty much shanked half of those"

 

[spongebob59]

Pro @ Pedham said I had all the right moves in my swing but not necesarily in the right order

 

[vkurup]

Pro @ Pedham said I had all the right moves in my swing but not necesarily in the right order

:thup:

 

[TheJezster]

The stroke saver for Ardglass golf club has this gem about the first hole.

Aim right, you have the whole of Ireland to aim at.

For those that don't know it, left on that hole is in the sea.

I've played there. Beautiful course and a very knee trembling 1st tee shot! Guy I was playing with topped it left into the sea only for it to bounce high on the rocks and back perfectly into the fairway leaving him with a wedge to the green &#128514;&#128514;

 

[richart]

During my first lesson at Blackmoor Steve described me as "Having the swing of a 20 handicapper, possibly worse" and that I would be "an interesting project".

He also stood and watched me hit about 10 balls, which weren't great but I didn't think we're too bad and then said "You pretty much shanked half of those"

He must rate you. I could not post what he said about me without an infraction.

 

[FairwayDodger]

About 2 mins after meeting me and watching me hit a few balls....

"For a player of your handicap, your ball flight is <expletive><expletive>!"

 

[Oddsocks]

He swore in front of a lady.... I'd change pro &#128077;

 

[FairwayDodger]

He swore in front of a lady.... I'd change pro &#128077;

I was actually impressed by his straight talking, bad boy attitude... Lol! Plus he was right and helped me make the changes to go from 7 handicap to 3.

 

[palindromicbob]

The stroke saver for Ardglass golf club has this gem about the first hole.

Aim right, you have the whole of Ireland to aim at.

For those that don't know it, left on that hole is in the sea.

I missed the country with my first and my second clung on for dear life. I aimed right and pulled it left twice &#128514;