Funny Expressions ??

[ColinR]

There are always some funny comments that come up related to golf, some are funny, some make me cringe. But I thought I would post a couple that I have heard recently and see what others have done the rounds.

The first one was when I was with my father-in-law, we were discussing golf. He is now 85 and no longer plays, but came came out with an odd statement, but true to how he feels.

"You know golf died for me when they changed the rules" he said

"What rule was that then ?" I repled

"Drinking and driving" came his reply !!

Also, a friend remarked to another friend when we were on the tee the other day

"you have a piece of S*** on the end of your club" he said to the golfer after seeing him hit a bad shot. The golfer then looked down at the end of his club and saw nothing. "the other end" said the other player !!! I understand this one is quite old, but it did make me laugh.

 

[mono217]

Drinking and driving LOL

 

[User 105]

The one that always makes me laugh is

"The last time I hit two balls straight together was when I stood on a garden rake"

 

[jammydodger]

I dont condone sexist behaviour but this made us all crack up on sunday

We were teeing off and caught sight of a group of lady golfers playing an adjacent hole , my god there was SEVEN of them. My mate straight faced says 'bloody hell thats 7 men going without a sunday lunch !)

Couldnt hit our tee shots for 5 minutes we were giggling like girls

 

[RGDave]

Playing with Tony, Alchemy and GJ, Tony went off-roading on a par 5.
I couldn't see him anywhere so asked Alchemy where he was?

"He's going the heroic route"......chuckle, I did!

Heroic route, sounds like Woosie up the 18th at Augusta....

 

[stevek1969]

Played with this old guy in one of our medals last year and my mate thinned his second shot 5ft from the stick ,he then said thats a sister in law shot , your right up there and you no you shouldn't . We couldn't stop laughing all the way round besrt one have heard in years.

 

[Billser]

nothing to do with golf lads but my mate went out all day when he was supposed to be taking his mrs out in the night, didnt get home until 23.00 ish drunk as a lord, he said when he walked in she was sitting there looking like a bulldog chewing a wasp with her face all screwed up in disgust, can you smell gas? he asked her...think about it lads..
made me laugh anyway...