Walked off the course as I had imploded, right or wrong?

[Golfmmad]

Walking in during a friendly game is not on in my book. You're out with mates to enjoy a crack, if it goes belly up that's golf, it happens to all abilities of golfers. I agree with Chrisd, if it's that bad and you're holding others up, just pick the ball up and move on.

It's the same in comps, never give up, unless for good reasons already given.
Now I wasn't going to admit to this, but, playing in the last medal I was having a mare on our par 5 11th - known as a card wrecker. Finished up with a whacking great 16!!!!! Did I give up? No way, I was fuming and raging inside, but tried to not let it show and determined to put it behind me and concentrate on the rest of the round. Ended up shooting 105, not good but not too bad either, considering the 16!

There are so many more important things in life to worry about.

 

[Mark_G]

Please gentlemen, I was not expecting this response, I have said repeatedly I appreciate your comments, and I will learn from them. However, the reason I posted this in the "Ask the Experts" section was not so my testicular situation could be discussed but to find out from senior people on the forum how to get back in the zone.
Quote from my original post

"What I want to know is, was I correct in walking off the course to practice? I think I was, but the chaps I play with wanted me to carry on. I think my head had gone, are there any techniques to get back in the zone whilst battling on?"

So far, very little constructive help has come, (thank you to all forum members who have posted advice), but an awful lot of "grow a pair" comments, and doubts about my character. I didn't post to seek forgiveness, or approval, I posted to ask for constructive advice on techniques to regroup whilst battling on. Several forum members have said focus on a particular part of the game, setting mini targets, several have said remove the pressure mentally eliminating what has gone on before, also to analyse whats going wrong by watching whats happening with the ball and adjusting. But the most important piece of advice seems to be don't give up.
I take all this advice on board, and thank you all for it.

 

[SocketRocket]

A) IMO there's no difference. Can you escape when you go out shopping with the Mrs and she's having a mare? No!! You're lumbered and you have to see it through. If you are playing football there's someone there to take your place (a sub), on a golf course there isn't.

B) Yes it's soul destroying - which is why you shouldn't walk away from it. It takes strength of character to take a beating and not give up. Watch a 'Rocky' film and tell me otherwise.

C) I think most high handicappers have a better grip on the reality of the game and are more likely to live with a really bad round. It's only as our handicaps start coming down that we begin to get ideas above our station and we get all precious; "I'm not this bad, honest". Well, yes you are!

D) If going to the practice area makes it alright, you could have bodged something together on the course, and not let yourself down.

By the by.....

About 12 years ago my daughter was taking her grade 1 or 2 on the flute. She was terrified and made a right cods of it. She finished and ran over to me and her mum crying. We were really proud of her coz she tried her best and she learned something about herself that day. Would I have been as proud if she had just given up and ran off crying half way through? Of course not.

And you lot are happy to say my 8 year old daughter had bigger cahunas at that age than you've got now?

A) Yes, I clear off to a bar, read the newspaper and let her get on with the shopping. Or, don't go shopping.

In golf you play the course, unless it's matchplay. In a team game(Football, Cricket) or pairs game (Squash, Tennis) you HAVE to stick with it.

B) I already explained that I don't always suggest people should walk off. All is not black and white though and there are many shades of grey. If someone is totally destroying their confidence and they are becoming distraught with what they are doing then the best thing to do is walk away from it, especially if you are not affecting someone else's enjoyment. People are not all made the same, do you suggest that someone who suffers a panic attack or is emotionally distressed should be told to "stick with it and grow a pair"

C) I agree partially with your point but high handicappers can feel embarrassed by their play and also that they are spoiling the game for others.

D) I did explain that as we become more experienced we have a better ability to analyse a fault and make a fix on the course. Less experienced players may not be able to do this but may be able to work through the problem with quiet practice. Have you ever been in the situation where you start shanking every iron shot and the more you try to stop the worse it gets. If you have then you may be a little more forgiving in your judgement of this guy.

 

[TXL]

Leaving the course mid round is not on in my book, the only excuse being if you are taken ill/injured or some other emergency calls you away.

With that being said, if I am having a mare of a round, how do I get the round back on track? I find that the more I try to get the round back on track, the worse it gets. So I try to just switch off and relax. So instead of thinking, I must get birdie/par here, just take each shot one at a time. Its amazing the number of times, when looking back at the round, that the scores improve from that point on.

 

[Foxholer]

As for this guy giving up. He doesn't do it because he feels he's a burden on others. He does it because he is embarrassed by his performance. He's used to being successful and doesn't like to put himself in a light when he's showing perceived weakness. I wouldn't want to be an employee of his during the bad times. BTW how many divorces has he had?

Completely ignorant; completely wrong!

 

[Snelly]

I wait to be surprised, but I don't think the OP did that...

Perhaps I'd expected too much from this forum, but the tone of that last email doesn't make me want to stick around. Yours, sir, is the attitude that stinks.

If I was you, I would put me on your blocked list as this is a relatively tame response from me.

Either that or have your own little tantrum and leave which ironically, is an online equivalent of the OP's childish behaviour on the course.




The only recollection I have of someone walking of the course relates to an anecdote that my grandfather told me. He was playing in a foursomes game as a veteran and when they got to the first green, one of his opponents, a (very posh) gentlemen of advancing years, bent over as best he could to check the line of his putt. As he did so, the forward movement was accompanied by a colossal and extremely wet sounding bout of wind!

There was a momentary pause as said gent tried to straighten up and stand. At which point he mustered up all the dignity that he could in this rather delicate situation and uttered an unforgettable phrase -

"Would you be kind enough to excuse me gentlemen? It would appear that I have just shat myself........"

 

[Imurg]

Leaving the course mid round is not on in my book, the only excuse being if you are taken ill/injured or some other emergency calls you away.

Is the correct answer..

When I used to organise the weekend roll-up at my last club, 2 guys - including a sitting Committee Member - decided they were having a bad day and walked off. I confronted them as they had left a guy to play on his own and he had to join up with another group.
They reasoned that it was "just a roll-up so it didn't matter".

I banned them from the roll-up and wrote a letter to the Committee - of which I was also a sitting member.
They were reprimanded severely and the ban was upheld.

Yes Golf is a game but as such it's not life and death if you're playing badly.
You wouldn't walk off when playing well so why walk off when you are playing badly.
It's disrespectful to your playing partners, to whoever organised the game and to the Game itself.
Especially if you then go and practice...

 

[bluewolf]

I'm not going to get involved in the "should you/shouldn't you" debate, but in response to the actual question in the OP, try setting micro targets. In stroke play, it could be trying to play the next 3 holes in 1 over. In stable ford, you could set a points target for the next 3. It helps to focus the mind away from the bigger picture of the entire round. More often than not, a sudden swing flaw can be the result of self imposed stress and pressure. So relieve the pressure.

 

[Digging a hole for myself]

Snelly - consider it done.

Imurg - that's the sort of attitude that reminds me why joining a club is perhaps not a good idea. I'm doing this for fun, not for endurance or to satisfy someone else's desire to organise others.

 

[ScienceBoy]

Snelly - consider it done.

Imurg - that's the sort of attitude that reminds me why joining a club is perhaps not a good idea. I'm doing this for fun, not for endurance or to satisfy someone else's desire to organise others.

Didn't realise you were a Winchester bloke! I am just down the old road at Chandlefordleigh, I was a member at south winchester for a year and a half! (until last August)

I am now not at a club and only play when I get the chance as my weekends are usually busy. I practice at the Chandlers ford academy driving range 3 times during the working week thought!

If we do play a round I just hope you can tolerate 18 holes with me! I do hope that having me as a playing partner is NOT an acceptable reason to leave the course

EDIT: I have a range card with a few buckets on that I am not going to use, you can have it if you want as I cannot use it for reasons I cant explain fully here)

 

[Midnight]

I was really looking forward to todays round, hadnt played for a week and had played ok last time, but today after a reasonable opening few holes I completely imploded, unable to hit anything straight or with any consistent strike at all. I decided to leave the two chaps I was playing with on the 7th as I was holding them up and the following groups were starting to close up too much. I went straight to the Academy course and practised my swing for the next few hours with a pitching wedge (obviously improving as I added 30 yards onto my normal distance, with great accuracy). What I want to know is, was I correct in walking off the course to practice? I think I was, but the chaps I play with wanted me to carry on. I think my head had gone, are there any techniques to get back in the zone whilst battling on?

To throw my vast knowledge into this , I don't think it is a question of if you were right or wrong , we all may or may not of done the same depending on circumstances. I think it is a good question i.e how do I get back into the zone? perhaps you should be forwarding it to Mike and asking him to ask the mind dude for the GM mag , about coping techniques and how to handle this if it happens again mate.

Cheers

Midnight...

 

[User20205]

Snelly - consider it done.

Imurg - that's the sort of attitude that reminds me why joining a club is perhaps not a good idea. I'm doing this for fun, not for endurance or to satisfy someone else's desire to organise others.

but ultimately golf is a social activity, by walking in you are you are potentially spoiling the rest of your groups' round. If you can't deal with a bad round other than leaving the course maybe mentally you aren't cut out to play ?? only play when the sun is shining and you are playing well ?? surely you are missing half the fun

I think Imurg is spot on. it is disrespectful all round.

If the OP wants direction on what he should do next time. aside from take your medicine and get on with it, maybe some kind of golf self help book would help. take each shot at a time :blah:

 

[chrisd]

Walking in also begs the question - ok you were playing awful golf and walk in and feel that doing so is no problem, two weeks later you play badly but not the awful golf as before ... but hey! no one minded when you walked in last time .... so off you trudge. A week later and you're playing better but 3 bad holes in the middle of the round sees you decide that you'll call it a day .......?

No ! I know you will say that it couldn't happen, but, the first time you walk in sets the standard in my opinion - after all - you have already made it clear that you don't care for the players you leave behind!

 

[SocketRocket]

I think the main issue is whether it spoils anyone else's golf. If it did then it's wrong, otherwise what's the problem. The others may even be glad to see him go?

 

[CrapHacker]

Please gentlemen, I was not expecting this response, I have said repeatedly I appreciate your comments, and I will learn from them. However, the reason I posted this in the "Ask the Experts" section was not so my testicular situation could be discussed but to find out from senior people on the forum how to get back in the zone.
Quote from my original post

"What I want to know is, was I correct in walking off the course to practice? I think I was, but the chaps I play with wanted me to carry on. I think my head had gone, are there any techniques to get back in the zone whilst battling on?"

So far, very little constructive help has come, (thank you to all forum members who have posted advice), but an awful lot of "grow a pair" comments, and doubts about my character. I didn't post to seek forgiveness, or approval, I posted to ask for constructive advice on techniques to regroup whilst battling on. Several forum members have said focus on a particular part of the game, setting mini targets, several have said remove the pressure mentally eliminating what has gone on before, also to analyse whats going wrong by watching whats happening with the ball and adjusting. But the most important piece of advice seems to be don't give up.
I take all this advice on board, and thank you all for it.

I might be lighthearted, but my advice was meant to be constructive.

You practice golf in order to play on the course. So if your normal game has disappeared it's not a physical thing, it.s a mental problem. In which case going back to the practise ground isn't solving the problem.

IMO there are two things to do on the course to make the best of a bad day

1) Let the past go. When it happened to me, I literally walked up to my playing partner on the next tee, shook his hand and dismissed the round thus far as a pre match warm up. This was the first hole of a new round in my mind

2) I then only played a limited number of shots, working on the idea that it was better to make a good impact with a shorter iron, rather than top/fat the 'correct' club. I then concentrated more on my short game near the green.

So I didn't ruin the game for anyone else, and I still managed enough decent shots to take some positives out of the round.

All joking/mickey taking aside - it is just a game.

 

[CrapHacker]

Completely ignorant; completely wrong!

Apologies if I offended you. But as a general rule, the logic stands. I've played some very poor stuff, and whilst my playing partners have felt for me, I've never known anyone wish I'd just piss off and let them get on with it. I, on the other hand, did want to curl up and crawl into a small hole. Rory last year was the perfect example of playing through the agony.

The line about being his employee was meant to be rapier wit, for which I apologise, I am kinda interested in the wife question tho'

 

[Smiffy]

I've played some very poor stuff, and whilst my playing partners have felt for me, I've never known anyone wish I'd just piss off and let them get on with it.

Wanna bet?????

 

[Heidi]

Is the correct answer..

When I used to organise the weekend roll-up at my last club, 2 guys - including a sitting Committee Member - decided they were having a bad day and walked off. I confronted them as they had left a guy to play on his own and he had to join up with another group.
They reasoned that it was "just a roll-up so it didn't matter".

I banned them from the roll-up and wrote a letter to the Committee - of which I was also a sitting member.
They were reprimanded severely and the ban was upheld.

Yes Golf is a game but as such it's not life and death if you're playing badly.
You wouldn't walk off when playing well so why walk off when you are playing badly.
It's disrespectful to your playing partners, to whoever organised the game and to the Game itself.
Especially if you then go and practice...

oh man - this made me howl with laughter

 

[MashieNiblick]

Please gentlemen, I was not expecting this response, I have said repeatedly I appreciate your comments, and I will learn from them. However, the reason I posted this in the "Ask the Experts" section was not so my testicular situation could be discussed but to find out from senior people on the forum how to get back in the zone.

Haven't been following this post for a while and surprised it was still going so thought I'd have a peek.

Personally I think it was brave to post on here that you had walked in and sensible to ask for advice as we're all experts on playing badly .

Haven't read all the posts, but understand your desire for some genuine help.

I have found 2 things have helped me.

1. See it as an intrinsic part of the challenge of the game. Just like a tricky chip or putt, except that it is a mental challenge. You will find your own things that work. A few deep breaths, telling yourself you CAN play this game, picking simple shots with easy clubs for a few holes that you know you can pull off can get your confidence (and swing) back instead of blasting away with anger and frustration hoping a miracle shot will help you.

2. Pretend that are you are playing well. Take as much time over your shots as you would if you were playing the round of your life and wanted to keep it going. Keep your head up and walk purposefully. Try keeping your eyes on the flag as you walk down the fairway. Forget what's gone before. Give each shot the attention it deserves whether it is for a 3 or an 8. That can help get your mindset back to how it needs to be.

Thse are just things that have worked for me. They may not work for you. I have also found Bob Rotella useful (I know some do and some don't).

Anyway good luck and remember that golf is only a silly game with a stick and a ball.

 

[CrapHacker]

Wanna bet?????

And this is before you've seen how far I've fallen this year.

I'm still waiting for an invite to your new gaff.

Then you'll see how lucky you've been so far.