Thai massage

Last night tonight so Missis T said were doin summat special. She is takin me to a ladyboy show. 😳 Oh joy of joys. Got 8 hrs to decide if i will be safer With or without me tash. 😖
 
Tashyboy said:
Last night tonight so Missis T said were doin summat special. She is takin me to a ladyboy show. 😳 Oh joy of joys. Got 8 hrs to decide if i will be safer With or without me tash. 😖
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Don’t worry about your tash, I’d be more concerned about your tush😂😂😂
 
Once more ave put me body on the line for the good of golf monthlys independant research on how a massage can help yer golf. And quite frankly Mike H. You can shove yer massages. I was unfrortunare that this time i had a 100% bonafida Honey with forearms like Rory. She is deffo Arnold Swarts his names love child. She had a vice like grip which was the only matched by her elbows of which she did 90% of the massge with. Not saying me spine is now permanently bent but i could ring bells in Paris. I paid 300 baht for me massage and had 200 left. I was advised half way through the massage i had feet like a pig and they could sort them Out. Price 200 baht. How lucky am I. I never thought they would put paint stripper on me feet at the same time i was having a one man game of “ twister”. My feet now I Have had 1” of dead skin took off are as soft as the day i was born. Trouble is none of me shoes fit me and i have Thai newspaper in the toes of me Crocs so they now fit. However Missis Ts twinkly sandals do fit. Am gonna look well in them Tonight at the ladyboy show. Me back muscles have been massaged to me chest so were also gonna be falling out who is wearing the best bras tonight as well. The whole experience of having the massage was about as relaxing as crossing the M25 with a wheel barrow full of horse muck.
Worst bit was when elbowing me thighs. I swear to god she missed the end of me todger by millimetres. If that had 10 stone on the end of it an accident report would now be filed.
Thank god theres beer to relax me.
 
Last edited:
Tashyboy said:
One more ave put me body on the line for the good of golf monthlys independant research on how a massage can help yer golf. And quite frankly Mike H. You can shove yer massages. I was unfrortunare that this time i had a 100% bonafida Honey with forearms like Rory. She is deffo Arnold Swarts his names love child. She had a vice like grip which was the only matched by her elbows of which she did 90% of the massge with. Not saying me spine is now permanently bent but i could ring bells in Paris. I paid 300 baht for me massage and had 200 left. I was advised half way through the massage i had feet like a pig and they could sort them Out. Price 200 baht. How lucky am I. I never thought they would put paint stripper on me feet at the same time i was having a one man game of “ twister”. My feet now I Have had 1” of dead skin took off are as soft as the day i was born. Trouble is none of me shoes fit me and i have Thai newspaper in the toes of me Crocs so they now fit. However Missis Ts twinkly sandals do fit. Am gonna look well in them Tonight at the ladyboy show. Me back muscles have been massaged to me chest so were also gonna be falling out who is wearing the best bras tonight as well. The whole experience of having the massage was about as relaxing as crossing the M25 with a wheel barrow full of horse muck.
Worst bit was when elbowing me thighs. I swear to god she missed the end if me todger by millimetres. If that had git 10 stone on the end of it an accident report would now be filed.
Thank god theres beer to relax me.
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Tashy Did she have big hands, feet and an Adams apple:LOL: or was you massage part of the Ladyboy stage show:ROFLMAO:
 
patricks148 said:
Tashy Did she have big hands, feet and an Adams apple:LOL: or was you massage part of the Ladyboy stage show:ROFLMAO:
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She had the smallest hands i have ever seen on a woman. She could carry bricks with them. I would of looked big in her hands l. 😳
 
I tend to get 30 minute massages to avoid the elbows. Elbows are just painful. They do them partly to go deeper but partly to rest their fingers and hands. They seem to be able to manage 30 minutes without having to resort to elbows.

Lesson to learn Tashy, when getting a massage advise no elbows at the beginning.
 
Lord Tyrion said:
I tend to get 30 minute massages to avoid the elbows. Elbows are just painful. They do them partly to go deeper but partly to rest their fingers and hands. They seem to be able to manage 30 minutes without having to resort to elbows.

Lesson to learn Tashy, when getting a massage advise no elbows at the beginning.
Click to expand...

Got a feeling al be seeing Thailand again. No elbows is lesson no1
 
PhilTheFragger said:
Did Mrs Tash enjoy the show?

is she trading you in any time soon? :LOL:
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Oh ah missis Tash. Shes the one that disappeared after we had a photo with the “ entertainers”. And i use that word very loosely. Guess who was the mug that had to give them tips. They have had my pants down. Pardon the pun. Off to bed sulking.
 
I had a Thai massage once in Amsterdam. Right old dragon of a woman (at least I think it was a woman) that carried it out.
She asked me if I wanted "extras". Looked at her and said "Yes please, two ham rolls and a cup of tea".
 
So today, Missis T booked us in for a spa day. Here's me bunged up to the eyeballs in flu goin for a massage. Lordy flippin Lordy. After 40 minutes I could of given her my four numbers to my credit card. Don't get me wrong 40 mins of listening to Perus top ten greatest pipe music got on me tits. But she proper knew which buttons to push. Think she enjoyed it as much as me listening to her groans. Or it could of been Missis T on the next bed. Anyway me backs proper loose. She then did a scalp massage, now having put some cucumber and lettuce on me eyes, I probably looked like a BLT sandwich but I didn't care. I came out of there chilled. Another hour sat in Saunas and steam rooms that resembled Kebab grills and Himalayan pink salt ecstasy rooms listening to richard Clayderman and I am now a new man. When I saw new, I mean I was. Been decorating since we got back, and talking of backs, it's gone again. Now where's that number for Miss Lube.
 
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