Laydee's Golf Woes

[PhilTheFragger]

Had a couple of free hours today, so went to the course to see if there were any available slots, was told to get straight on so I did, They did mention that there was a Ladies match on, but that the last 4 went out an hour and a half ago, so id never catch them.

So Off I went, Playing quite nicely 10 points off the first 4 holes and feeling good. Went through the hedge to the 5th par 3 and saw the laydees match just teeing off on the 6th

Well i caught them up at the 7th tee, and I was informed that as it was a match they wouldnt be letting me through!!

What followed was amazing, Bearing in mind that these are representing their clubs, you would have thought they should be half decent players.

There followed a procession of topped/shanks/mis hits etc none going more than 5 ft in the air and none longer than about 75 yards.they were rubbish.

I teed off after they had played their 4th shots, and then had to wait ages on every shot, very frustrating and knocked me right off my rhythm. and as i had a two ball behind me, couldnt really play with more than one ball, to mix it up a bit.

They were soooo ssslllooowwww

I packed up after the 9th

Remind me to avoid laydees match days in the future

Fragger

 

[timgolfy]

But did they have good short games?

 

[Mongoose]

My missus plays most of the ladies matches for her club. The bigger matches they put out their best team, lowest handicappers, best golfers etc, but for less important matches they let others have a turn. I suspect a blubber (collective noun for a group of lady golfers) of the others are what you have experienced!

 

[HawkeyeMS]

But did they have good short games?

No shot longer than 75yds? All they had was effing short games

 

[PhilTheFragger]

No Timbo they would have done better with a snooker cue

Fragger

 

[HawkeyeMS]

I suspect a blubber (collective noun for a group of lady golfers)

absolute genius.

 

[Imurg]

Fragger - always, always , always. check to make sure you don't go out behind our ladies section. They are possibly the worst bunch I've ever seen. I don't think there's a decent player among them and as for Gobby June - well she's a law unto herself..

Steer clear of them Oh Floppy Shafted One and you Golfing days will be full of the Joys of Spring - get stuck behind them and it's Hell on Toast...

Plus they were playing Bierton (my old club) and they're not much better..

 

[HomerJSimpson]

Had a similar experience at my place. The can go out several hours ahead of you and you'd still ctach them by the 9th. I'm sure one day they are going to stop for a coffee morning on one of the fairways. We do have a few decent players but in these friendlier games they tend to give anyone else who fancies it a game. It can be frustrating but not much you can do once you've caught them up

 

[Gazboy]

It can be frustrating but not much you can do once you've caught them up

In the case of the original example while the ladies are walking between their 75 yard pitches you could tee up, think of Tim and smash it 300 yards clean over their heads and get to the green before the ladies are even aware of your existence. OK it's poor form and bad etiquette but these ladies do not seem to have the moral high ground to air their indignation either.

 

[Imurg]

It can be frustrating but not much you can do once you've caught them up

In the case of the original example while the ladies are walking between their 75 yard pitches you could tee up, think of Tim and smash it 300 yards clean over their heads

Ermmm
THis is Fragger we're talking about here.......

300 yards? Only in his dreams..

 

[PhilTheFragger]

Oi Back Off Lard Ass



Im PhilGolfy
And I do Things My Way

 

[Imurg]

Tell me I'm wrong - go on!!

 

[Basher]

They should be in the halfway hut brewing up the tea!!!

(Dons tin hat and takes cover!!!)

 

[HomerJSimpson]

Ermmm
THis is Fragger we're talking about here.......

300 yards? Only in his dreams..

Well maybe for his 4th shot

 

[19thagain]

I have a lovely golfing story about a wee (5 foot max!) Laydee, working in the oil industry and was required to do her offshore training and this included fire fighting, carried out at Montrose, not far from Carnoustie.

As you can imagine Montrose enjoys superb golfing facilities and the oil workers decided to have a game in the evening and wee Liz, the only female, asked could she join them. They offered to let her pull a cart but she hired clubs and in trainers, teed off from the gents tees, along with her offshore 'Pop-eye muscled' companions.

She won the game and then told them she played off four and was a County player and enjoyed the spoils which she spent on pints for the boys to ease their embarrassment.

 

[C_MAC]

I was playing in our clubs singles on Saturday and I was talking to the course ranger and he was telling me about a group of ladies who wre playing in the ladies open day the previous Thursday. The 4 ladies took an hour and a half to get onto the 4th green. The course starts off with a par 5,par 3 and 2 par 4's,with no danger or out of bounds. We were trying to think what took them so long and came to the conclusion that they must have had a picnic on the 3rd tee box. And to make it better when the course ranger went over to tell them to hurry up they gave him a mouthful of abuse and reported him for abusive behaviour. I couldn't believe it when he told me

 

[BoadieBroadus]

Yes I've seen similar. Our 13th is over the crest of a hill about 130 yards from the tee.

I watched a ladies four ball take a collective 11 shots and still none of them had made it to the top. THe thing was they treated it like it was such a hoot. I've no idea what possible enjoyment they were getting from it.

Likely the only possible fun was holding up the single male golfer on the tee behind them. I bet they were all brilliant once they'd got out of sight.