how long a horse can run faster

[Smiffy]

Domestos kills 99% of household germs.
The other 1% dies of loneliness

 

[Deleted member 18645]

Eight out of 10 owners said their cats preferred it. The other two ate it themselves.

 

[NearHull]

Two thousand sausages, two thousand men - one each

 

[jim8flog]

People who live in glass houses shouldn't!

mistake the green house for their home.

 

[Doon frae Troon]

Domestos kills 99% of all germs.
It's that pesky 1% that kills you.

 

[Blakey]

As i was going to St Ives, i met....... an Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman.

 

[Deleted member 1147]

An Englishman, Scotsman & Welshman meet in a bar,
The Englishman wanted to leave, so they all had to go.

 

[ManinBlack]

A man with a hole in his pocket can feel cocky all day.

Woman who sit on brother in law's knee make it hard for sister.

 

[ColchesterFC]

An Englishman, Scotsman & Welshman meet in a bar,
The Englishman wanted to leave, so they all had to go.

Very good, apart from the fact that the Welshman also wanted to leave (52.5% v 47.5%) so it was actually just the Scotsman that wanted to stay in the pub and carry on drinking.

Fancy that, a Scotsman that likes a drink!!!! (<----- that's a joke by the way, just in case anyone thinks I was serious. Other stereotypes are available on request).