Advice/Help please guys

[Timh27]

Sorry to hear about your mum homer.

My mum has terminal throat cancer and we faced the same problem. She didnt want us to live with her as we have 2 young kids and didnt want them to see her when she is in the last stages. She chose to go to a nursing home which i was very concerned about as i have heard horror stories about them. I must admit that it was the best choice as she has made some good freinds and has excellent care 24/7. Nursing homes are not cheap but a good one is worth it's weight in gold and depending on your mum's finances social services will pay the bulk of it. The other option is to get a live in carer which it sounds like your mum needs if not now then in the future. The problem is they cost as much as a nursing home and i dont think you get as much/ any financial support for them.

The below websites should hopefully give you more info

http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/CaringForSomeone/CareHomes/DG_10031525
http://www.mariecurie.org.uk/en-gb/patients-carers/for-carers/
http://www.macmillan.org.uk/Cancerinformation/Ifsomeoneelsehascancer/CaringForSomeone.aspx

Hope it helps

 

[sev112]

Homer - sorry , got nothing to add other than i hope things find a reasonable way of working, as i have no doubt the stresses on you and your missus are pretty hard in trying to deal with this difficult situation.

 

[sawtooth]

Sorry to hear about your mother Homer. I would see about getting her moved closer to you (or even in with you) so you have as much regular contact as possible. I wish I saw a lot more of my Dad in the run up to his passing away because this time is precious and of course you never get it back. Best of luck.

 

[golfbluecustard]

Sorry that i have nothing constructive to add other than wanted to say sorry to hear your news - when my father in law was unwell my wife and her mum spent an enormous amount of time driving back and forth then after months the one night she was just so knackered she didn't visit the worst happened.

Unfortunately there is no easy solution to these things but sounds like the other members gave some constructive advise - just don't beat yourself up. Easier said than done i know.

GBC