How do I get my confidence back

[Voyager EMH]

It’s driving me insane that I can’t play how I know I can!!
Any advice from similar players more than welcome, in fact anyone who can help me get my confidence back please!!

You can not be helped to get your confidence back.

That was lesson number one.

You want to get your confidence back.

Stop wanting.

That was lesson number two.

That's enough for you to think about today.
Tomorrow we will have another lesson or two regarding how you will get your confidence back.

 

[Golf is fun]

I'll caveat this by saying I'm not yet good at golf, but I do have some understanding of sports performance.

I think you need to break this down into a couple of different things.

You say your putting has gone, have you measured this, or is it just a feeling? You may be holing less putts, but are they of the same difficulty as previously? Is your proximity on approach the same, are you playing the same course, or are you on greens with different contours, has the speed of the greens changed?
The purpose of this part is to accurate analyse your performance, so you can identify what to work on if anything.

The second part is how you perceive things. Why do you want to stop putting pressure on yourself? If you want to be competitive (nothing wrong if you prefer to just play socially or for fun), pressure will always be there, nerves will always be there. It doesn't matter who you are or how elite you are, but it does matter how you channel that pressure and nervous energy. If you truly want to be competitive, the goal shouldn't be to find ways to reduce the pressure, but to find ways to put more pressure on yourself in other situations, so you get used to it and develop strategies to live with it.

 

[The Squirrel]

Don’t know why this video was labelled as a hole in one video. It features for a couple of minutes, but the rest of the video is actually more interesting and useful regarding managing the psychological aspects of the game. Would be helpful here?

 

[ntommo]

Just go out and play golf. You play this game as a hobby and hobbies are meant to be enjoyable aren't they. Even the best go through bad patches, stop putting pressure on yourself and stop putting general play cards in every time you play. Go out and have some fun and the good scores will return

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

Wow thank you, a bad round is not the end of the world, I am happy to be alive and happy I have some kind of talent for the game, onwards and upwards let’s gooo!!

…and so in a fourball match yeserday my game was much improved over my recent horrible slogs and the shambles of Wednesday. Just had a bit of faith that things would eventually reset…and clear evidence to me yesterday that I can still play decent stuff…still too much sloppy rubbish and poor decision making for my liking - but that’s golf.

 

[Hobbit]

Set achievable short term goals. For example, if you’re off 18 look to play the next 3 holes in 2 over. If you achieve that, you can play the next 3 three over and still be carrying a shot in hand. Rinse and repeat.

Don’t stand on the tee and think don’t double bogey it. Stand on the tee and think fairway. If you miss the fairway, set an achievable goal of getting the ball comfortably back into play - if you go for the green out of a scabby you’ll risk a double bogey but if you wedge out and wedge on you stand a better chance of a par.

And if your confidence is currently a bit shakey, accept that 12 good holes is a ‘win.’

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

Set achievable short term goals. For example, if you’re off 18 look to play the next 3 holes in 2 over. If you achieve that, you can play the next 3 three over and still be carrying a shot in hand. Rinse and repeat.

Don’t stand on the tee and think don’t double bogey it. Stand on the tee and think fairway. If you miss the fairway, set an achievable goal of getting the ball comfortably back into play - if you go for the green out of a scabby you’ll risk a double bogey but if you wedge out and wedge on you stand a better chance of a par.

And if your confidence is currently a bit shakey, accept that 12 good holes is a ‘win.’

…and looking back on each of these 12 holes I’d pick out the good and really good in each.

Though I lost my match yesterday I can look back on it and I can see where I hit shots that were as good if not better than my normal with whatever club I was using…indeed some shots that I can rightly feel really good about (not so much a fan of feeling ‘proud’ about myself in anything I do). I can look back at the poor, but rather than dwell on it I can take the poor as telling me where I can get even better…

 

[Jigger]

Easier said than done I am super competitive

You just need to be competitive in the right way. Enjoy some games just knocking it around the place, taking on different shots or just taking your irons out. Pro don’t regularly keep score outside of competitions so why should we? They are looking for misses and recoveries from certain situations.

Also be aware of the stats for your level and I would probably just compare to 1hcp below you at your level as the margins get finer. For example, I was playing with a 12hcp yesterday who was chasing scratch. He was 5 over with 4 to play and saying he needed a couple of birdies. I said “you do realise that birdies are rare at your level and you are likely to create bogies by chasing them. You should be trying to create more pars.”

He continued to chase, got a few bogies and was annoyed that he only beat his hcp by 2

 

[Voyager EMH]

???????????????? = Lower Scores

The left hand side is all the things you need to do, and, it appears, have been trying to do, and, have asked for advice on what to do.

This is the thought process that has not been helping you, or more precisely, helping yourself.
It appears to have made things harder for yourself by adding more complications of thought.
As I said earlier - no one on here can help you to get your confidence back. You have to help yourself.

Confidence is a thought.

You will get your confidence back when you are able to simplify the left hand side of the equation in terms of your thinking.

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

I came to realise some weeks ago that my ego (around me being a quite useful, competitive and successful club handicap golfer) was my problem - see for instance me making excuses for keeping a 2.2 on my handicap record when I needed to get rid of it. I am not playing to a diff of 2.2…just accept that. So it’s now gone and my handicap will start to climb. But that’s fine as that’s just how my golf is at the moment.

I have a 5.4 that will go next time out - and another four counting scores in a row after that. 5.4 is about 7 over at my place which I can do…but I’m not bothered. My golf is messy at the moment and I need my HI to get to where it should be so I need to get these five scores off my handicap record, and if and when my HI is much higher than my ego would like it to be I must tell my ego where to go. The pressure of my handicap will become less of a handicap on my ability to enjoy playing…and when I find myself playing, and hopefully (but not necessarily) scoring better and under whatever handicap I have, I will know I am on my right path.

And I have faith within and without myself, with acceptance and a bit of humility, that I’ll find that right path.

 

[OnTour]

Same 2.4 to 8 in 3 years. Hitting it better HOW can you be so poor or score so badly. Driver has gone AWOL and has always been my strong point. I guess keep grinding pray for form and returning confidence

Keep us posted