BBQ time is here. But who gets the credit for the BBQ?

[haplesshacker]

This is circulating on Facebook and I thought it was funny! And dare I say. True! It is on the blog, but I'd thought I'd save you the hassle!!

We are about to enter the BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity . When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:

(1) The woman buys the food.

(2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.

(3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.

(4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three meter exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

Here comes the important part:
(5) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

(6) The woman goes inside to organise the plates and cutlery.

(7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat

Important again:
(8) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

(9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.

(10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes

And most important of all:
(11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

(12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ', and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women

 

[Leftie]

And that is exactly why the Leftie household has never done (read as been allowed) a BBQ.

 

[Andy808]

It doesn't matter who prepares it, who plates it or who washes up. ONLY the person who actually cooked the food is allowed to be praised for the work they have done. It's the law!

 

[Iaing]

Sounds fair enough. However, the missus no longer allows me to light the bbq.

 

[CMAC]

you forgot to add that the Man will either burn the meat or undercook it as its the only thing he's 'cooked' all year.

 

[StrangelyBrown]

you forgot to add that the Man will either burn the meat or undercook it as its the only thing he's 'cooked' all year.

I do all the cooking in our house, wife does the washing up. It works for us.

 

[CMAC]

I do all the cooking in our house, wife does the washing up. It works for us.

so it's you!

 

[Doon frae Troon]

You forgot the bit about the woman cleaning the grill the following day.
One of the reasons we don't do BBQs.
Cook it indoors, eat it outdoors makes life peaceful and simple.

 

[CMAC]

BBQ's done on kit that lies out for 364 days a year is a sure fire recipe for Salmonella sausages or Botulism in a bun

 

[StrangelyBrown]

BBQ's done on kit that lies out for 364 days a year is a sure fire recipe for Salmonella sausages or Botulism in a bun

The grill is normally detatchable, and can fit in the dishwasher...

Anyways, BBQ is about my favourite thing ever. Grilling is ok, but your burgers and bangers are normally not over the coal long enough to soak up any flavour. Proper BBQ is cooking huge chunks of knarly meat over a smokey low heat for a LONG time.

Here are some of my efforts...

8 hour cooked pork shoulder...





2 racks of belly ribs on the right, and a BBQ concoction of crispy fried bacon, wrapped in sausage meat, wrapped in bacon on the left.

 

[brendy]

I prefer to buy the meat and prep it myself as the missus is a veggie, kids love it though, just waiting for the weather now and well be BBQing it weekly!

 

[mikee247]

The grill is normally detatchable, and can fit in the dishwasher...

Anyways, BBQ is about my favourite thing ever. Grilling is ok, but your burgers and bangers are normally not over the coal long enough to soak up any flavour. Proper BBQ is cooking huge chunks of knarly meat over a smokey low heat for a LONG time.

Here are some of my efforts...



8 hour cooked pork shoulder...





2 racks of belly ribs on the right, and a BBQ concoction of crispy fried bacon, wrapped in sausage meat, wrapped in bacon on the left.

Impressive!! Im assuming you've done those on a charcoal BBQ rather than a gas one/ If so how have you kept an consistent heat for 8 hours? Interested in trying something different this year but prefer gas ....

 

[StrangelyBrown]

Impressive!! Im assuming you've done those on a charcoal BBQ rather than a gas one/ If so how have you kept an consistent heat for 8 hours? Interested in trying something different this year but prefer gas ....

Yep, I use charcoal and oak wood that I get from my father in law. I need to top it up with coal and wood every 45 minutes or so, then close the lid and keep an eye on the temps and adjust the air flow accodingly. Cooking low and slow uses an indirect heat, so the meat is never above the fire.

If you're interested, this guy knows his stuff

http://barbecuebible.com/

 

[Pin-seeker]

No self respecting man would cook on a gas BBQ

 

[arnieboy]

I don't mind a BBQ as long as it is done by someone else! Can't cook, don't cook.

 

[Khamelion]

Those ribs looked well tasty.

I'm having myself a BBQ this year and I fully intend to slow BBQ some huge hunks of beef, pork, cow, bull, pig, sheep, buffalo anything with hooves . Might even try some fish