A familiar, sad tale.

[Deleted member 18588]

I know others have posted similar threads but I never thought I would be going down the same road.

After 44 years I seem to have fallen out of love with the game. It is now very difficult for me to summon the enthusiasm to put my clubs in the boot and head to the Club of which I have happily been a member for over 32 years.

Never been a great player with my best handicap having been 13, a figure I stayed around for a number of years until about eight or nine years ago when it started to gradually creep up and now stands at a most disappointing 20.

My game, particularly round the greens has become an embarrassment and no amount of lessons and practice seems able to cure it, and now I seem to have reached the stage where I no longer care. Arthritis and other physical complaints have not helped either.

I have always been a new gear "addict" but now find I cannot be bothered to even look in the shops or on line.

So, come the end of October when my subscription next falls due I really do think it may be a case of "thanks for the memories" and the clubs confined to a dark corner in the garage.

Hope this does not seem too self-pitying it's just that I never thought this would happen to me.

 

[PhilTheFragger]

Sympathise Mickie

have a chat with ArnoldArmChewer, he went through a very similar thing a few months ago, but has taken a break from the game and is slowly easing himself back in

Its different for everyone and there is no catch all answer, but if you arent enjoying it, then get away, take a rest, take up macrame, but dont throw away the clubs coz some one sometime will say "fancy a game" and you just might

Good Luck

 

[Rooter]

sorry to hear this! maybe a sabbatical from the game rather than a full on ending! Was looking forward to catching up at the H4H day again! days like that make the +0.1's worthwhile!

All the best in whatever you chose!

 

[Deleted member 15344]

It is very sad to read when people no longer find enjoyment in the game

Hopefully a sabbatical will grow a new found desire to hit the white ball soon

I'm a massive believer in the game should all be about fun and social enjoyment - if I didn't enjoy it I wouldn't play regardless of HC etc so hopefully a little break will ignite the enjoyment

 

[ManinBlack]

It's a vicious circle, isn't it, you play badly & don't feel like playing & the less you play the worse you get. I sympathise with you, being 67 and suffering from a few things that ensure I'll never be as good as I was. Good advice not to get rid of the gear, give it a rest and you may come back to it fresh with you head clear of all the thoughts stopping you from playing to your potential just now. I really hope you rediscover the huge enjoyment you can get from the best social game there is.

 

[Deleted member 1740]

Dick, don't give up mate your too good of a man to give up.

Take a little break away for sure, you'd be surprised how much a break helps.

When i played with you at beau you certainly had a good game then and I'm certain your game will come back.

Chin up ol' boy

 

[RobertB]

Just go out and play, HC and club competitions are not the purpose and reason for playing the game. On here I see too much fret over rules and HC. Just get out and savour any decent shot, forget the bad and move on, enjoy company of friends/colleagues and if all they want to do is around comps & HC find new playing partners.

 

[RGDave]

Do what you feel is right for you.

I quit after a measly 6 years, frustrated that I got to 8 for about a month and never really had the long game to even play off that... saved by a stupid amounts of chipping practice, mostly.

Quit for about 7 years and came back one day... almost no reason why. My chipping never returned in all honesty.

Give it a break, see how you feel and maybe you'll just fall back into it one day.

There's no wrongs or rights. If it's not doing it for you and the body is less willing, take a break.

 

[Coatsy79]

It is very sad to read when people no longer find enjoyment in the game

Hopefully a sabbatical will grow a new found desire to hit the white ball soon

I'm a massive believer in the game should all be about fun and social enjoymentt - if I didn't enjoy it I wouldn't play regardless of HC etc so hopefully a little break will ignite the enjoyment

Very much agree with this, I only ever do anything if I enjoy it, if you stop enjoying it, it's possibly time for a break

I can fully sympathise with you, I've played 9 holes in the last month, had a spell of playing poorly, then couldn't get enthused to go, thus perpetuating the cycle of bad golf

Hoping one of my rounds is encouraging and I get the bug again which I'm sure I will

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

I empathise. I stopped for 8 yrs due to family and change of job reasons. Started up again and though OK game deteriorated over last ten years until I reached my 2-3+ shanks a hole period couple of months back. I really was considering just not renewing in November as golf was making me utterly miserable. All I could see was my handicap drifting and drifting up and me being more miserable - especially when I reflected back (a dangerous thing to do) to days of being off 6 and regularly knocking it round in low single figures over par.

What has changed is that I have effectively made a fresh start. Started taking lessons (for the first time ever) and changing my swing almost completely - it is as if I am starting playing again - but my enthusiasm is back.

Your situation is kind of similar in a way. So yes - take some time off - maybe a couple of years. Then come back with lessons from the start; maybe take lessons before you even rejoin or hit a course again. See if that improves things with your game and then consider if you want to rejoin a club or even start playing again. Just a thought.

 

[ArnoldArmChewer]

I know others have posted similar threads but I never thought I would be going down the same road.

After 44 years I seem to have fallen out of love with the game. It is now very difficult for me to summon the enthusiasm to put my clubs in the boot and head to the Club of which I have happily been a member for over 32 years.

Never been a great player with my best handicap having been 13, a figure I stayed around for a number of years until about eight or nine years ago when it started to gradually creep up and now stands at a most disappointing 20.

My game, particularly round the greens has become an embarrassment and no amount of lessons and practice seems able to cure it, and now I seem to have reached the stage where I no longer care. Arthritis and other physical complaints have not helped either.

I have always been a new gear "addict" but now find I cannot be bothered to even look in the shops or on line.

So, come the end of October when my subscription next falls due I really do think it may be a case of "thanks for the memories" and the clubs confined to a dark corner in the garage.

Hope this does not seem too self-pitying it's just that I never thought this would happen to me.

As Fragger said, this is EXACTLY my story, so I understand exactly where you are. You will have to row your own boat on this but if it helps I will say:-

I gave the game up in April after a wretched couple of years where despite trying most things my game got worse and my love for the game temporarily evaporated, I was no fun to play with and my game was worse than shocking so after 40 years of playing I stopped, gave up club membership and relegated my clubs to a dark corner (well not that dark and not much of a corner as they went in with all my 'spare' gear, which is not inconsiderable). I still watched golf on TV and followed the lies on here but didnt hit a ball for a couple of months, however I had committed to a charity day in July and didnt want to let my host down so completely unprepared i turned up and to my surprise enjoyed my golf, since I have had another game with my old doubles partner and again enjoyed my golf and even smiled at the one and only shank of the day. I think the moral for me is that I do still love the game and I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that if my h/c goes up so what, believe me this isnt easy for me to accept but if I am going to enjoy the game I have to learn to accept this, i hope this new approach will actually result in an improvement but if it doesnt then so what !!

I do apologise for rambling on here but if it saves another old fart from the scrapheap then I shall be happy. Will I have the pleasure of meeting you at H4h this September ?, I do hope so.

 

[Deleted member 15344]

As Fragger said, this is EXACTLY my story, so I understand exactly where you are. You will have to row your own boat on this but if it helps I will say:-

I gave the game up in April after a wretched couple of years where despite trying most things my game got worse and my love for the game temporarily evaporated, I was no fun to play with and my game was worse than shocking so after 40 years of playing I stopped, gave up club membership and relegated my clubs to a dark corner (well not that dark and not much of a corner as they went in with all my 'spare' gear, which is not inconsiderable). I still watched golf on TV and followed the lies on here but didnt hit a ball for a couple of months, however I had committed to a charity day in July and didnt want to let my host down so completely unprepared i turned up and to my surprise enjoyed my golf, since I have had another game with my old doubles partner and again enjoyed my golf and even smiled at the one and only shank of the day. I think the moral for me is that I do still love the game and I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that if my h/c goes up so what, believe me this isnt easy for me to accept but if I am going to enjoy the game I have to learn to accept this, i hope this new approach will actually result in an improvement but if it doesnt then so what !!

I do apologise for rambling on here but if it saves another old fart from the scrapheap then I shall be happy. Will I have the pleasure of meeting you at H4h this September ?, I do hope so.

Echo those thoughts and really glad you have found enjoyment in the game again

 

[ArnoldArmChewer]

Echo those thoughts and really glad you have found enjoyment in the game again

Phil, thanks, I was hoping to put my name down with you for Saturday at the Centurion with RickG but regretabbly I think Iam going to need to work as I am having a few days away next week, but hope to have a game with you soon.

AAC

 

[Deleted member 15344]

Phil, thanks, I was hoping to put my name down with you for Saturday at the Centurion with RickG but regretabbly I think Iam going to need to work as I am having a few days away next week, but hope to have a game with you soon.

AAC

Thats a real shame because if there is one course i have played that grabs your enjoyment regardless of how you play it is ricks little gaff .

Im not far from you so any time you do fancy a knock just give us a shout :thup:

 

[ArnoldArmChewer]

Thats a real shame because if there is one course i have played that grabs your enjoyment regardless of how you play it is ricks little gaff .

Im not far from you so any time you do fancy a knock just give us a shout :thup:

Will do, The Centurion is great, I played Rick there last winter, he dragged me round off the faarrrrr back tee's, its a long track when theres no roll out on the ball. Enjoy your game on Sat.

 

[Sweep]

At the risk if this becoming a "whoa is me" thread, I feel your pain.
For the first time ever I walked off the course this week without completing my round. This has to be the most disappointing season I have ever experienced. I have never practiced so much and yet it seems I am going backwards and I have begun to realise my h'cap is as low as it is going to get, that there is no magic bullet and it isn't going to get any better. All of this is, of course, bitterly disappointing. I always thought I would get much lower.
Like most of us, I guess, I have some golfing commitments to fulfil over the next couple of weeks, but after that I have pretty much decided to call it a season and see how I feel next March. This is incredibly hard to do, especially when you consider the money you pay for membership and the fact that last winter I would have killed to be able to play in such nice weather.
There seems to be some good advice on here, particularly I think in relation to just playing bounce games or social golf to take the pressure off. Maybe I will look at that.
I sincerely hope that you (and I) resolve our golfing issues and we are both back on the course, enthusiasm restored soon. Just remember, this is a really, really difficult game that bears no resemblance to reality. For no reason whatsoever, fortunes can change and you can and probably will start playing well again very soon. That, as everyone keeps telling me, is golf. I live in hope.

 

[Doon frae Troon]

Forget the handicap and competitions and just play for fun and see if that helps.

I stopped playing this year and took up lawn bowls.
Joined my wee village club and loving it.

I seem to be pretty decent at it and within 6 games I was asked to play in an inter club match. [politely declined as I did not have a clue about all the rules]
£40 a year subs, s/h bowls and new shoes made the set up costs just over £100 + 50p a night sweep money.
Two nights a week for two hours in a beautiful setting now I wished I had given up golf three years ago when I felt like OP.

 

[the smiling assassin]

friend of mine gave up a couple of years ago. seemed to be going through a bit of a mid-life, which on the golf course meant an obsession to get down to single figures. it took him 2-3 painful years to eek his way down from 11 to 9 during which he sapped all enjoyment out of his game, practicing 3 or 4 times a week, obsessing over technique/new ideas/phycology etc., spent a fortune on lessons and buying new equipment. we always tried to get him to relax on the course, but he would always just respond that he'd "do things his own way". when he finally sneaked over the line (9.4) he spent a couple of weeks basking in the glory before a mental slump sent him back up to 10. sadly his golf never recovered and in the following months, the he got himself into such a state on the course - it was stressful just to watch, it must have been horrendous to experience. subsequently he gave up the game and is trying to recover from the mental scars. it was sad to see how he let it affect his personality, his family life. it's just a game at the end of the day and while it's nice to have target's - there are other far more important things in life than stressing about a 0.2 cut or dare i say a 0.1 increase...

 

[SwingsitlikeHogan]

At the risk if this becoming a "whoa is me" thread, I feel your pain.
For the first time ever I walked off the course this week without completing my round.

Oh feel your pain. I was there about 8 weeks ago - I had reached the side of our 9th green and after my tee shot I'd hit maybe 6 shanks in a row. At that point standing up above the green in a gorse bush and going to have to drop back towards the previous tee as ball unplayable watched by guys on that tee - I was for jacking it and walking in - and I've never done that. But deep breath and a few words of encouragement from PPs and the other guys - I kept going - carded a 12 but never mind. On the mend now.

 

[AmandaJR]

Forget the handicap and competitions and just play for fun and see if that helps.

I stopped playing this year and took up lawn bowls.
Joined my wee village club and loving it.

I seem to be pretty decent at it and within 6 games I was asked to play in an inter club match. [politely declined as I did not have a clue about all the rules]
£40 a year subs, s/h bowls and new shoes made the set up costs just over £100 + 50p a night sweep money.
Two nights a week for two hours in a beautiful setting now I wished I had given up golf three years ago when I felt like OP.

Funny you should say that but watching at the Commonwealth had me thinking about bowls! Played a few times with my Dad as a youngster and was naturally adept it would seem. Recall playing in Torquay on holiday and the old guys all watching and saying "did that young girl just do that" much to my Dad's irritation as I was thrashing him! One on the back burner for me if I ever feel like the OP for too long. Have been going through a bit of a torrid time since my cut to 6 and it's not been enjoyable at times on the course. There's just nowhere to hide and so little room for error now. so I get more tense if things start to go awry. I've worked very hard though and am turning things around and hoping to bounce back stronger...

It's a tough game allright!