UK prisons - anyone got experience of visiting etc?

[AmandaJR]

Bad news day for my family as my nephew has been sentenced to 30 months imprisonment today and discharged from the army Long story short but, a week home from Afghan, and on an all night bender, got in a fight (other guy seriously injured) and for the past 12 months has been waiting for his sentence...

So all we know at the moment is 48 hours in Colchester then to Chelmsford civi prison for "acclimatisation" before (hopefully) being sent to somewhere nearer home. I've been trying to find out from the government website about visiting etc but wonder if anyone has experience of prisons/prisoners and advice as to what we can do to keep his spirits up. It looks like 2 visits a month but not sure what contact he can make via phone calls and whether he needs money or phone cards for that...

He's not a bad lad and we so hope this doesn't make him lose hope and get in more trouble. If he keeps his head down then hopefully he'll serve 15 months and be out on parole.

Any advice/experience/tips gratefull received.

 

[mikee247]

Sorry to hear about this... never good news when a family member gets into trouble... I think the sentence is a bit harsh I used to be in the army and when we came back or were on R&R from an operational tour we were always a bit wired for obvious reasons and of course after whats normally quite a few months with no beer and lots of anxiety, stress and probably seen mates killed and badly injured.... it doesn't take much winding up from some other bloke to makes the sparks fly. I'm far from condoning bad violent behaviour but people have to realise what these guys go through when on op tours and especially in Afgan. Ive seen plenty of fights and mass brawls when the boys go and let off steam!! I personally think there should be a more gradual track back into civi life with full a valuation before allowed to go and get completely slammed. These are mostly v young kids who have no real idea how to deal with emotion and anger when it bubbles up and hits you after a few pints.

Anyway - I hope it works out for him and gets a break Im sure he regrets the incident.

I have a brother in law who has been in the prison service for well over 20 years. Prisoners who are well behaved and not seen as a threat do get a better time inside and of course once they have been rehabilitated they are keen to get them out quickly as spaces are in short supply! Id get another lawyer on the case and explore the combat exposure bit more and get that sentence reduced. Good luck.

 

[AmandaJR]

Thanks. It does seem very harsh as he had 24 hours r&r then back to work in Germany for 2 weks before being allowed home to see his family. The other guy was a civi and looking for a fight all night - sadly my nephew was the one who snapped. He was 22 then so yes a young man (boy really) and has been through hell waiting for this sentence to be handed down. He's been all but a recluse for 12 months rather than put himself in the environment where this happened.

We all hope he'll get his head down and serve his time. He seems to understand the better he behaves the better he'll be treated BUT he is a big lad and I worry another prisoner will pick a fight and it's whether he's learnt that walking away has no shame.

His lawyer is meant to be very experienced but I do wonder what he's actually done for him as he told him to plead guilty to a lesser charge..

 

[guest100718]

I had a friend who went to prison for a while, it was quite a few years back but he would send a visiting order so we could go and see him just once a month as it was a long drive. I wrote letters regularly which he said he always enjoyed getting.

 

[mikee247]

Its v difficult to walk away from a fight at the best of times let alone when your trapped in a prison with no where to go! I feel for your nephew it does seem that he being used to make an example to others which I think is shocking.... At 22 yrs old and getting a 2yr plus prison sentence life from now on is going to be very hard let alone the time he has to serve.... All for one mistake... Its very harsh in my opinion. Id get the family to look at this again. If there are witnesses to the fact this other chap caused a fight then with the combat exposure etc then surely there must be a lawyer who would bite your hand of to take this on.... I sometimes wonder about the legal system and if its as pure as people think.

If he can re train whilst in prison such as a plumber or engineering etc then that will help the time fly by and give him something to work with when he gets out as that will be tough for him as well. Trained trade guys are in short supply everywhere.

 

[AmandaJR]

Thanks again Mike. The other guy admitted provocation but doesn't seem to have lessened the sentence. I'll suggest my sister ask some questions about whether they can appeal. I've not seen the evidence but he had hoped it would be useless as the whole bar was hammered (11am after all night session). Not sure if it makes any difference with him being in the army and if they are harsh as they feel he has brought shame on them?

Good idea about retraining and he needs something to come out to other than body building and becoming a bouncer! I'm just not sure what stigma there is attached these days to a prison record but hope he gets a second chance. He had great references from his yeoman and a couple of officers but that doesn't seem to have helped today.

 

[El Bandito]

Sorry to hear this Amanda. My nephew was in prison for a while. He needs to send you Visit Orders. Despite the urban myths, it is a tough place. He needs to find something to focus on, as suggested above. Retraining is a great idea. Letters and visits are the highlight of the day or week and my nephew wanted lots of banal chat...he wanted to feel that he had not alienated his family. From your point of view, be prepared. I found visiting pretty scary. Prisons are not happy places.

 

[AmandaJR]

Sorry to hear this Amanda. My nephew was in prison for a while. He needs to send you Visit Orders. Despite the urban myths, it is a tough place. He needs to find something to focus on, as suggested above. Retraining is a great idea. Letters and visits are the highlight of the day or week and my nephew wanted lots of banal chat...he wanted to feel that he had not alienated his family. From your point of view, be prepared. I found visiting pretty scary. Prisons are not happy places.

Thanks Stuart. When he was in Afghan I sent him an ebluey (email) every couple of days with chit chat and stuff - almost a blog I suppose. I saw him on Sunday and he sobbed and said how ashamed he was so yes we need to keep reminding him we love him and are there for him. Poor lad. Hadn't really thought about what visiting would be like so thanks for the warning so I'm somewhat prepared.

 

[El Bandito]

Keep the mails going. I'm sure there will be some guys in there looking for trouble, and I'm equally sure he will walk away. The sentence can come down a long way if he keeps out of harms way.

 

[stevelev]

In addition to the visits inmates are able to earn whilst inside. He can also complete a variety of courses inside. They will probably have him on anger management course but if he does as many courses as possible it will fill the time a bit. You are also able to pay into his account so he can use it to purchase food, toiletries and phone cards.

He is best trying not to get involved in cliques and just keep his head down. If he can do any form of work when he is in there he will be out of the way of those inmates who just choose to veg out and cause occasional problems.

If you have any questions I'm sure there must be a prison officer or recently released person on the forum who can help you out with advice. There will be a family liaison at the prison who will give you advice. Like others have said if he focuses on something and doesn't mix with idiots he will be fine and may even get his sentence close to home in a lower cat prison. Something they are trying to do more now is a ROTL (Release on Temporary License) programme where inmates can work outside the prison on a voluntary or minimal paid basis. I have managed several ROTL inmates and all have been fantastic workers. We have gone on to employ a couple of them, so there is still goof things after his time Timpsons (shoes and key cutting) are one of the countries most forward thinking employers of inmates and ex-offenders, it might be worth him asking from the start if there is a chance of him getting ROTL due to first sentence and the low risk of absconding.

 

[tyke]

Amanda, I am a serving Prison Officer and you have PM.

 

[stevelev]

Amanda, I am a serving Prison Officer and you have PM.

Good man Tyke, a you 'modern' or 'old school' lol

It really is a good place where people can help others out and settle their worries to some degree.

 

[tyke]

Good man Tyke, a you 'modern' or 'old school' lol

It really is a good place where people can help others out and settle their worries to some degree.

Steve I'd class myself as more old school but with a modern approach

 

[HomerJSimpson]

Known a few army guys and they liked a beer on their downtime. Places like Camberley, Aldershot and Windsor became no go areas for them as there were too many civvies looking to prove themselves the hard man. Sorry to hear about the sentence and hope he can get his head down, do the time and come out the other side

 

[beau d.]

So Sorry to hear this. It does make me quite ashamed of authority, I am not condoning violence but we train these lads in combat and put them in a life threatening environment to defend our freedom. Then we expect them to come home and act like odinary Joe with endless tollerance and think they can switch off all the training and turn the other cheek, It just doesn't happen!!!!. Special consideration should have been given certainally not a custodial sentence..... So sad how we turn on our heros shame on authority.

 

[Sharktooth]

Dunno if I was actually classed as a visitor... probably 'customer' would have been a more accurate definition. A file baked inside a cake may have come in handy

 

[AmandaJR]

Thanks so much for all the replies and PMs guys - he'd feel so much better if he could read how supportive people are towards him. Anyone I've spoken to feels the same and hopefully he can hold his head a bit higher in time and feel less ashamed.

Thanks again - it would seem weird to those who don't know this place that I'd both ask and receive advice about prison - that's what makes it special...nowhere else I could have asked.

 

[Billysboots]

Sorry to hear your news, Amanda.

Whilst I know some are saying this is harsh, to judge that they really need to know what offence he was charged with, and whether it was his first offence. If you don't want to answer that, I certainly understand.

 

[AmandaJR]

Sorry to hear your news, Amanda.

Whilst I know some are saying this is harsh, to judge that they really need to know what offence he was charged with, and whether it was his first offence. If you don't want to answer that, I certainly understand.

I'm really not asking people to judge and he did wrong and is paying a price for that - albeit with extenuating circumstances. He's never been in trouble before but hit this guy pretty hard and as a result he has impaired hearing. The charge was GBH.

What's done is done and as a family we need to deal with it, move on and do our utmost to make sure this stays his only offence and he doesn't lose hope.

 

[bigslice]

top tip dont go out partying for two days before visiting and turning up with a bag of pills and bottle of poppers in your pocket!!!!!! a friend of mine did this, he was asked to leave. lol