Self-obsessed playing partners having a bad day at the office.,

[JohnnyDee]

A lot of us play in regular groups and so frequently play with the same PPs which can be comfortable, easy on the nerves and often just good fun.

But of course we all have different levels of patience and whilst many of us can endure a careless mistake, or a bad rub of the green with nothing more than self-controlled inward tutt of anger, a deep breath and then refocusing on the next shot, others allow the black dog to descend upon them. And when things worsen - as they all too frequently can - our "mates" can get down on themselves to the point where they start to become a right pain.

Their moaning and negativity starts to affect us and our own games and just drags the atmosphere down to sub-zero levels.

When this happens, particularly in a comp, then what do you do?

Do you bite your lip and let them crash and burn, ultimately blowing a fuse before they accept their race is run on that day, or do you have a stiff word and tell them to stop being so selfish and consider the games of their PPs.

I used to endure and indeed indulge their petulance but now the older I get then the more I'm likely to confront them about their selfishness.

Golf is ultimately a game played in a good spirit with good grace and to have it ruined by some self-centred berk whinging, whining and bleating about their terrible luck can spoil it if they are not taught the error of their ways.

 

[richart]

Fortunately I never play with anyone like you have described JD. Perhaps I just bring out the best in my partners with my cheerful disposition.:thup:

 

[JohnnyDee]

Fortunately I never play with anyone like you have described JD. Perhaps I just bring out the best in my partners with my cheerful disposition.:thup:

Thankfully I'm mostly lucky too, however I have had a few instances of this over the years. Indeed back through the far mists of time and into my own petulant youth I can't honestly put my hand on heart and swear that I wasn't an offender.

However if I did offend then it really was a very long time ago and I learnt my lesson.

I'm now like any convert - a flaming obsessive zealot.

 

[Jensen]

I would just say, hey calm down you're not doing yourself any favours beating yourself up. And that's golf, we all have those days

 

[Tashyboy]

Fortunately my regular PP have all had occasions when they have "knobbed shots" but never have gone overboard about it. It makes for a pleasant four and a half hours.

However I have played with people who have lobbed clubs and have been pig ignorant, bad etiquette, horrible to talk to. I have not played with them since and made my excuses.

I dont put put up with it away from a golf course so don't put up with it on the golf course.

 

[toyboy54]

I used to think that I was just letting off steam until one of the PPs said that I was peeing them off and should just realise that I was never going to go back in time and play at where I was years ago....so just enjoy and accept!Now I just try to laugh at at too many duffs/mi***** but don't dare look for applause for the occasional good shot

 

[chrisd]

I haven't played with a club throwing obnoxious type in comps for many a year. I, like you Johnny, wouldn't entertain someone like that for too many rounds before refusing to go out with them

 

[Smiffy]

Perhaps I just bring out the best in my partners with my cheerful disposition.:thup:

I think it's more your obsession with 80's fashion and hairstyles that keeps us amused mate.

 

[Slab]

A lot of us play in regular groups and so frequently play with the same PPs which can be comfortable, easy on the nerves and often just good fun.

But of course we all have different levels of patience and whilst many of us can endure a careless mistake, or a bad rub of the green with nothing more than self-controlled inward tutt of anger, a deep breath and then refocusing on the next shot, others allow the black dog to descend upon them. And when things worsen - as they all too frequently can - our "mates" can get down on themselves to the point where they start to become a right pain.

Their moaning and negativity starts to affect us and our own games and just drags the atmosphere down to sub-zero levels.

When this happens, particularly in a comp, then what do you do?

Do you bite your lip and let them crash and burn, ultimately blowing a fuse before they accept their race is run on that day, or do you have a stiff word and tell them to stop being so selfish and consider the games of their PPs.

I used to endure and indeed indulge their petulance but now the older I get then the more I'm likely to confront them about their selfishness.

Golf is ultimately a game played in a good spirit with good grace and to have it ruined by some self-centred berk whinging, whining and bleating about their terrible luck can spoil it if they are not taught the error of their ways.

When do you do this, surely not during the round, it'd have to be afterwards

If while playing do you really think that you'll be able to 'teach them the error of their ways' in the middle of a round of golf. That's just a guise for the chance to call them out on their conduct

The former is an admirable goal but unlikely to work, the latter (while it may be deserved) is just telling a guy acting like a prat that he's a prat & makes you feel a bit better to get it off your chest, doesn't teach him anything though

In the bar or on way home might make the target more receptive but by then the golf is done and you have other options on whether to play with them again

 

[delc]

One of my regular playing partners seems to go into a deep depression and just gives up trying, if he plays the first four or five holes badly. Although he is not unpleasant about this, I find his attitude a bit counterproductive. I personally never give up until I have completed the 18th hole, and often manage to dig out a good score after a poor start to my round. If nothing else, I might discover something that will help me in my next round. Even if I play really badly, I would rather score 21 points than 20 and still break 100. I have only failed to break 100 once in the last 5 years.

 

[Hobbit]

My first comment is usually, "we don't do it for a living." Then the more subtle, "do you realise how much of a dick you are being." And if it carries on they just get ignored. I'll walk by myself, and not join in the rant. When they want to re-engage I'll ask them if they've finished with the tantrums.

 

[MashieNiblick]

Played with one once many years ago. Unfortunately we were just a 2 ball. The most miserable 4 hours of my golfing life. I don't think he stayed a member long. He obviously didn't actually enjoy golf so maybe he gave up playing. Still wince thinking about it and one reason why I'm very wary of putting my name down in an empty tee slot. I'd rather wait so I can find a slot with someone I know. Very lucky now to play regularly with a great group of guys and to know enough others to be sure that my day won't be spoiled by my PPs.

 

[davemc1]

Lucky you guys don't play with the Nw lot. A real bunch of angry bar stewards they are

 

[Tashyboy]

One of my regular playing partners seems to go into a deep depression and just gives up trying, if he plays the first four or five holes badly. Although he is not unpleasant about this, I find his attitude a bit counterproductive. I personally never give up until I have completed the 18th hole, and often manage to dig out a good score after a poor start to my round. If nothing else, I might discover something that will help me in my next round. Even if I play really badly, I would rather score 21 points than 20 and still break 100. I have only failed to break 100 once in the last 5 years.

But isn't that the point about playing golf that you either pack up and sulk after five holes or dig deep and try to put in a score.
What about " cometh the hour, cometh the man".
lost count the amount of times I have looked at scores in our comps when players have had terrible starts only to come good later in the round and win.

 

[bluewolf]

Lucky you guys don't play with the Nw lot. A real bunch of angry bar stewards they are

Only because we have to spend half the round looking for your pinnacles.

 

[huds1475]

Only because we have to spend half the round looking for your pinnacles.

For me it's having to buy any 'lost' balls back off him in the car park that really grates.

 

[Norrin Radd]

My first comment is usually, "we don't do it for a living." Then the more subtle, "do you realise how much of a dick you are being." And if it carries on they just get ignored. I'll walk by myself, and not join in the rant. When they want to re-engage I'll ask them if they've finished with the tantrums.

im liking the cut of your jib old boy .:thup:
sounds like you have had to put up with a few knobs in your time.

 

[bluewolf]

For me it's having to buy any 'lost' balls back off him in the car park that really grates.

Yeah, especially on top of the tenner I've just paid him and his mates to "watch my car"....

 

[Robobum]

As long as you are a 3 of 4ball it doesn't matter 1 bit to me if someone is having a wobbler. They just become the one walking between shots on their own whilst the others carry on the rond and chats on the way.

 

[JohnnyDee]

When do you do this, surely not during the round, it'd have to be afterwards

Yes, you're right and to be fair it never gets confrontational, as at the end of the day I'm referring to mates, and the chastisements offered by me and others in our group are offered as ribbing banter perhaps with the odd barb or two thrown in.

Mind you, I have seen the odd flare up though between habitual offenders and those in our group who lean towards the less diplomatic and that can make things icy for a few holes.

Playing with strangers in a comp who do it sees me ignore it and never play with them again in subsequent ones.