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JT77

JT77

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Mar 12, 2010
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Got news today the my dad, who is 60, has stage 4 oral cancer that has spread to a gland also. Found out last week it was cancer, then today the consultant explained the extent.
I live in Northern Ireland, my dad, back home in the north east, so I'm not even close by. My sister god bless her is, and is doing her best to ferry about and cope etc. Feel utterly useless.
He needs 6 weeks radio and then see how it goes from there, however both my sister and I are not sure how he will cope, he is already terribly thin, and not the healthiest of chaps.
Thought I was doing well, and then spoke to him this eve, and almost broke down, my 13year old daughter was with me, so I did me best to hold it together, but I'm struggling, hence why I am writing this. Apologies for doing so, as I know we all have our own problems, I'm just hoping that by writing it out it helps me get me head round it a little.
My wife and other 2 kids will be home soon from the zoo, and I know that they will make me smile, and help, but inside I feel rotten.
Thanks for giving me a platform to vent folks, appreciate it.
 
JT77 said:
Got news today the my dad, who is 60, has stage 4 oral cancer that has spread to a gland also. Found out last week it was cancer, then today the consultant explained the extent.
I live in Northern Ireland, my dad, back home in the north east, so I'm not even close by. My sister god bless her is, and is doing her best to ferry about and cope etc. Feel utterly useless.
He needs 6 weeks radio and then see how it goes from there, however both my sister and I are not sure how he will cope, he is already terribly thin, and not the healthiest of chaps.
Thought I was doing well, and then spoke to him this eve, and almost broke down, my 13year old daughter was with me, so I did me best to hold it together, but I'm struggling, hence why I am writing this. Apologies for doing so, as I know we all have our own problems, I'm just hoping that by writing it out it helps me get me head round it a little.
My wife and other 2 kids will be home soon from the zoo, and I know that they will make me smile, and help, but inside I feel rotten.
Thanks for giving me a platform to vent folks, appreciate it.
Click to expand...

Don't apologise mate,life can be very cruel.
All the best to you and your family.
 
Mate we are a family here, sometimes dysfunctional, but we pull together and support each other when life throws us a curve ball.

Really hope the treatment works,
Feel free to vent
 
As Fragger says, we all have our problems and as odd as it may seem, just talking Rammel on here has helped me in the past and present.

Hope it works out for you all.
 
Sorry to hear that mate and the distance apart won't help either, give your family a hug tonight and I'm sure your Dad knows you love him.
 
really sorry to hear about your father - ever need to chat or just shout the odds then we will always be here.

Hope the treatment works well
 
Sorry to hear your news and really understand you writing it down.

My experience has always been that this can help us work things through in our minds more clearly.

Really hope the treatment works for your Dad - and as a fellow Norn Irnender - don't loss the bap and keep strong for him mucker.
 
Never apologise, the fact you are able to post it shows just how strong you really are.

I echo the messages from the others, there is nothing I can really do to help but my thoughts are with you and your family. Hopefully the treatment works and dad gets well soon.

If you do feel like you want to vent some more in private feel free to drop me a PM
 
Really feel for you and your family, been down this path with dad over the last few years. My Dad had tongue cancer that had spread to lymph glands and had to have chemo and then radio, my dad survived/got though this. the cancer was removed with radio and did not need an operation and lived for another 2 years without any cancer.

Some tough days ahead for sure, but keep your head up high, laugh on the good days and laugh on the bad days. And wish you all the best.
 
my sister and I are busy writing questions down for the consultation on Tuesday, just so we know the score, my sis today didn't want to ask some things incase my dad didn't want to hear her asking them, so hopefully will know even more then and get chat with dad to make what he feels are the right decisions moving forward. Thanks again for the support. :)
 
I do understand how you are feeling right now. I am sure he understands his Family are behind him.

Heres hoping for the best result for him.
 
JT77 said:
my sister and I are busy writing questions down for the consultation on Tuesday, just so we know the score, my sis today didn't want to ask some things incase my dad didn't want to hear her asking them, so hopefully will know even more then and get chat with dad to make what he feels are the right decisions moving forward. Thanks again for the support. :)
Click to expand...

Having sadly been in your position, if your Dad is anything like mines his biggest concern will be for his family and how this will affect them, not worrying about himself.

So look out for him as he'll be too busy looking out for everyone else.
 
My golfing buddy of many years, over 30 years, went through the same diagnosis and treatment in the mid 80's. He's still here, and still putting like a donk.

I wish you and yours well. Remember to look after yourself too.
 
Thanks folks, it always means a lot when people go out of their way to offer help and support, and it's very much appreciated, also nice to hear wee stories of hope, even if your mate still putts like a donk hobbit 😂
 
Thinking of you and your family JT. Hope the prognosis is as good as it can be. It is at times like this that we find reserves that we didn't know we had.
 
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