Golfing one liners

[madandra]

In one of my first posts (golf gospel) I asked you what phrases you had heard other players say that you never would on the course. They were like 'On the dance floor but nowhere near the band' and my least favourite I hear is 'be the number' and the responses entertained me.


Now I would like you to tell me the best put downs you have hear 'cos on Monday night I was playing a doubles tie and my partner said to the other guy ' you are standing too close to the ball ....... AFTER YOU HAVE HIT IT !!!!'

But please don't enter the one refering to cybling intercourse as it was funny when you hear it the first time.
Andy

 

[birdieman]

Madandra
Dont get your partners joke - did he hit it an inch or something? - please explain.

 

[Atticus_Finch]

After I left a 40 ft putt at least 15ft short, my playing partner asked me if I had got my putter caught on the hem of my skirt. Bar Steward!

 

[madandra]

He hit his drive 50yards in the air and only 50 yards off the tee.

 

[muttleee]

"Golf clubs for sale - sweet spot never used".

 

[rgs]

Cut two inches of your clubs they will fit easier in your wheelie bin.

Best quote--Lee Trevino-"Hold a 1 iron in a storm as not even god can hit a 1 iron".

 

[andycap]

2 shots in the bunker = "Adolf Hitler"