Facebook Etiquette

Lord Tyrion

Lord Tyrion

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Finally catching up with the modern world I joined Facebook on Friday. My new golf club has a closed group on their where they post information so I thought it made sense. I don't intend posting my life, what I had for tea, deep and meaningful "thoughts for the day" etc. I just want to see what is going on at my club.

How little did I know. I am now getting snowed under with friend requests, classic Facebook friends. Do I decline or just not click anything and leave them hanging? Some requests, family and friends, I will have to accept out of politeness. It is the others I am asking about. The friend of a mutual friend rather than the random person from Venezuela, I kid you not, nor the worker in an African safari park who I know nothing about. Etiquette regarding Facebook please.
 
The big issue for me is that while your own discipline with 'internet security' may be high you're not it control of that of your 'friends', especially clubs and casual groups which do not have X-check processes like corporations.

So as a very low level user hence I deny all invitations and only use what I initiate.
 
Deleted my Facebook 6 months ago.

Been very happy with my decision. Was full of boring people pretending their life was better than it was.

People would add me as a friend but would not even say hi when walking past me in the street.

Political morons thinking their opinion was the only thing that mattered.
 
pauldj42 said:
Only accept those you know and trust.
Click to expand...

Absolutely. The question is do I actively decline or just leave the request hanging? If I decline a request does the person who sent it receive a message saying I declined?

I have no problem declining my African safari worker or my Venezuelan person, it is those with a mutual friend who I don't want to actively offend, if declining is seen as offending someone.
 
Facebook if used sensibly can be a very good social media platform. It's helped me get back in touch with old friends from school , guys I joined the RAF with and old friends from RAF bases I used to live on as kid. It's a good tool to use to have private groups and sort out occasions etc - Facebook is superb if all the nonsense is ignored. Become friends with people you know and trust and people you will talk to are be interested to see what's going on. Ensure your privacy settings are ok if you just want certain people to see any pictures.

Over the years I have seen some brilliant videos on Facebook , some sad ones , some heartwarming ones and some that get you angry.

A perfect example of how good Facebook can be is how the country reacted on their to you Bradley the Sunderland lad with the illness - people all over the country just supporting him etc - brilliant to see.

shame some just judge people who use Facebook on a small picture of the site
 
Lord Tyrion said:
Absolutely. The question is do I actively decline or just leave the request hanging? If I decline a request does the person who sent it receive a message saying I declined?

I have no problem declining my African safari worker or my Venezuelan person, it is those with a mutual friend who I don't want to actively offend, if declining is seen as offending someone.
Click to expand...
If you're on a closed group then you don't have to be friends with someone to see what they or you say in that group.
On the personal side I'd only accept those you know, the rest I'd leave hanging.
 
Lord Tyrion said:
Absolutely. The question is do I actively decline or just leave the request hanging? If I decline a request does the person who sent it receive a message saying I declined?

I have no problem declining my African safari worker or my Venezuelan person, it is those with a mutual friend who I don't want to actively offend, if declining is seen as offending someone.
Click to expand...

They don't know you have declined. For people I don't know or have no interest in becoming "friends" with, I just decline and block them. That way they won't see any of your posts or even be able to find you if they searched.

Also check your privacy settings so only your friends can see things you post, rather than friends of friends or public. Also another thing you can set up is lists, so you can set family, close friends to be able to see everything and everyone else to see very little.

Ultimately it is up to you how much you use it and what you use it for and you can share as much or as little as you like.
 
I have two really good groups of friends on Facebook. The most important is that it is the way that my wide family of cousins and second cousins keep in touch (about 40 of us) - and it is great for my 84 yr old aunt as she is on also and sees what all her immediate family and relatives are up to.

The other is a group specifically set up for memories of the island my father hails from. We share old photographs and memories - others in the Group can relate to the memories and fill in gaps; and we can post photos in which there are folks we don;t know - and the Group is usually able to identify everyone. I also have seen a few photos posted by others and in which my dad is in - these being photos I'd never before seen. So nice that.

My son also uses Facebook a lot as the main platform for his band/event management business and also for advertising his band and what they are up to. He's just back from a short tour to France and Spain and has been able to post pictures on the page of his band performing and with other bands. All good stuff.

But there is an awful lot of - look at me and what I am doing - me myself I stuff - that is - frankly - tedious...
 
I also came off Faceache a few months ago, my feed just seemed to be full of crap about John Smith liking some PPI site etc etc.

Personally, I'd leave them hanging. And as for requests from old school colleagues etc, well there is a reason I am no longer in contact with them..........
 
Norrin Radd said:
i cant even say i wish i could help as i dont belong to this group of people who have no lives of their own.
Click to expand...
Sweeping statement, which could be equally applied to the saddos who inhabit forums. How pathetic, they should get a life. As a means of keeping up to date with friends & family who live many miles away there's nothing better. Like lot of things in life, it's what you make it yourself.
 
I have faceache to admin a business interest, in my personal bio it even says' DO NOT ADD ME AS A FRIEND' etc etc, but people still do, i just leave them hanging.
 
Dasit said:
Deleted my Facebook 6 months ago.

Been very happy with my decision. Was full of boring people pretending their life was better than it was.

People would add me as a friend but would not even say hi when walking past me in the street.

Political morons thinking their opinion was the only thing that mattered.
Click to expand...

Very true. Can you really delete it though? I bet you can log in now if you try.:mad:
...you can check out any time you like but you can never leave....
 
maxfli65 said:
Very true. Can you really delete it though? I bet you can log in now if you try.:mad:
...you can check out any time you like but you can never leave....
Click to expand...

no you can do a proper delete, i did it about 5 years ago. they do drag it out though and its actually quite complex to do!
 
Liverpoolphil said:
Facebook if used sensibly can be a very good social media platform. It's helped me get back in touch with old friends from school , guys I joined the RAF with and old friends from RAF bases I used to live on as kid. It's a good tool to use to have private groups and sort out occasions etc - Facebook is superb if all the nonsense is ignored. Become friends with people you know and trust and people you will talk to are be interested to see what's going on. Ensure your privacy settings are ok if you just want certain people to see any pictures.

Over the years I have seen some brilliant videos on Facebook , some sad ones , some heartwarming ones and some that get you angry.

A perfect example of how good Facebook can be is how the country reacted on their to you Bradley the Sunderland lad with the illness - people all over the country just supporting him etc - brilliant to see.

shame some just judge people who use Facebook on a small picture of the site
Click to expand...

Agree with all of this, use it for what it is but don't let it take over your life.
 
Lord Tyrion said:
Absolutely. The question is do I actively decline or just leave the request hanging? If I decline a request does the person who sent it receive a message saying I declined?

I have no problem declining my African safari worker or my Venezuelan person, it is those with a mutual friend who I don't want to actively offend, if declining is seen as offending someone.
Click to expand...

I leave some hanging, preferably by the neck.

I find it good for keeping up on what our grown up children are up to. Their generation use it quite a bit, and although it can get a bit silly I find it really useful.

I'm also in a few closed groups, inc old Uni pals, which I enjoy.
 
You don't have to add anyone, even family and close real life friends.

It's your account, do what you want with it.

It's 2017, it's not offensive to decline anymore like it was 5 years ago.
 
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