Addicted to golf

Harry_Putter

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Joined
Jan 23, 2008
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20
You know you are addicted to golf when:

1. You put your seat belt on by trying to keep your left arm straight and your head still
2. Even worse – you put it on again only this time making sure you turn your shoulders as well
3. You stand up straight and your left foot is turned out 30 degrees
4. You pick an umbrella up with both hands and then look down to check your grip
5. You give a stranger directions by saying “you take a 3 wood down here then turn left and the house you are looking for is a nine iron on the right”
6. After watching the Golf Channel for 12 months you are really tempted to buy the K1 Speed Driver just to see…….
7. You realise there is absolutely nothing to watch on Sky TV now the Golf Channel has ended
8. You were annoyed you had to spend last Christmas day indoors when the sun was actually shining
9. The weather forecast is a ‘must see’ TV programme from Wednesday onwards
10. You think a birdie is better than sex
11. You can remember the last time you made a birdie but you can’t remember the last time you had sex
12. Your idea of foreplay is ten minutes on the practice putting green before you tee off
 

HTL

Tour Winner
Joined
Apr 18, 2007
Messages
3,464
Location
Surrey
Welcome to the forum Harry-Putter, looks like you more than qualify as a golf nut.

Remember golf clubs must be in boot of car at all times.....just in case
 

medwayjon

Tour Winner
Joined
Aug 22, 2007
Messages
4,594
Location
Chatham, Kent.
I'm an addict too. Beacuse of these reasons;

1) Too much time spent on this forum
2) Sometimes at work I get my clubs out of my car just to have a hold and practise swing
3) I am on friendly terms with the guys at the range
4) I have 2 golf calendars next to my desk
5) I have a lucky golf ball in my desk
6) I am always dreaming of golf
7) My desktop rough pad is covered in potential hole designs
8) I bring golf into conversation far too often
9) I get the arse if I havent played for a week
10)I get the arese if I havent been to the range for a couple of days
11) When I buy clothes I think "will this suit the course" as priorty when selecting my attire
12) I haven't been fishing for 18 months

Surely will think of more aswell

(I copied this from a previous post of mine)

Welcome to the forum mate, I'm sure you will get to know us all well!

Best wishes
Jon
 

Up_Point_1

Head Pro
Joined
Jan 16, 2007
Messages
329
Location
UK
When I buy clothes I think "will this suit the course" as priorty when selecting my attire

With you all the way on this one MWJ. I do this all the time.

DHM.
 

Harry_Putter

Hacker
Joined
Jan 23, 2008
Messages
20
Hi all

Took the game up last September at the age of 51. On my first round went round in 122. Now going round in low 90's. How long will it be until I am on the senior pro tour as I need to give work 6 weeks notice?
 

MVP

Journeyman Pro
Joined
Dec 4, 2007
Messages
2,068
Location
Medwayterranean
You know you are addicted to golf when:

1. You put your seat belt on by trying to keep your left arm straight and your head still
2. Even worse – you put it on again only this time making sure you turn your shoulders as well
3. You stand up straight and your left foot is turned out 30 degrees
4. You pick an umbrella up with both hands and then look down to check your grip
5. You give a stranger directions by saying “you take a 3 wood down here then turn left and the house you are looking for is a nine iron on the right”
6. After watching the Golf Channel for 12 months you are really tempted to buy the K1 Speed Driver just to see…….
7. You realise there is absolutely nothing to watch on Sky TV now the Golf Channel has ended
8. You were annoyed you had to spend last Christmas day indoors when the sun was actually shining
9. The weather forecast is a ‘must see’ TV programme from Wednesday onwards
10. You think a birdie is better than sex
11. You can remember the last time you made a birdie but you can’t remember the last time you had sex
12. Your idea of foreplay is ten minutes on the practice putting green before you tee off


Listen up mate, welcome to the forum and all that. But i have to say i absolutely LOVE your username I wish i thought of that!! Quality.
Where you from by the way?
 

Harry_Putter

Hacker
Joined
Jan 23, 2008
Messages
20
Thanks. I live in cheshire where it always seems to be raining. People tell me it's a different game in the summer and the ball actually bounces!!!
 

toonarmy

Q-School Graduate
Joined
Nov 2, 2007
Messages
931
Location
York, England
Hi all

Took the game up last September at the age of 51. On my first round went round in 122. Now going round in low 90's. How long will it be until I am on the senior pro tour as I need to give work 6 weeks notice?

Fantastic! Do you really need to give notice with all the coin you can make beating Rocca, Mason et al.?

Great to have you on board - take your current enjoyment and multiply it by a factor of 10 when the sun's shining!

Just don't write any more of those crappy books please... :D
 

HomerJSimpson

Hall of Famer
Joined
Aug 6, 2007
Messages
69,721
Location
Bracknell - Berkshire
You know you are addicted when

1) the staff at the driving range send you birthday and christmas cards
2) you go into work and immediately book annual leave on the midweek stableford and medal days
3) the wife turns the telly on in the morning and it is still on Setanta golf
4) you take a practice swing in the mirror of the gents in work
5) you have the clubhouse on speed dial on your mobile so you ca check the course is open
6) the pro comes onto practice ground with your phone messages
7) you have your own dedicated area on the practice ground and the pro has more of your practice balls in his bag than you do
8) your ring tone is the bbc tv golf theme
9) everyone knows your wife even though she only drops you off and picks you up at the club (never uses the clubhouse)
10) you are in AG so often you get mistaken for staff
 

MVP

Journeyman Pro
Joined
Dec 4, 2007
Messages
2,068
Location
Medwayterranean
i know when im addicted to golf because ive racked up 600+ posts on this forum in a month and half!!!!
 

HomerJSimpson

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Joined
Aug 6, 2007
Messages
69,721
Location
Bracknell - Berkshire
MVP

You know what, you are right! People often say hello to her in Tesco (male and female) and I say "who's that" and she says its so and so from your golf club and I'm thinking are you sure, I've never played with them in my life

Apparently because I am addicted to golf, she comes to meet me (we only have one car at the moment) and if I can't drag myself off the practice ground, putting green or I am coming up the last she will sit and wait. Apparently everyone keeps coming over to see who she is/is she OK and when she mentions my name, most of the male members will know immediately where I am (usually still hitting balls somewhere) and the ladies just start gossiping to her as if she was a member

Its all very strange. Sadly from her perspective most of the male members who chat to her are firmly in our the senior section of the club (except the last captain and I wondered how got back in so easily when I rejoined. Hmmmmm)
 

Parmo

Tour Winner
Joined
Oct 3, 2007
Messages
5,004
Location
Yorkshire
When I buy clothes I think "will this suit the course" as priorty when selecting my attire

With you all the way on this one MWJ. I do this all the time.

DHM.

I am reading this in my Maine tank top and polo and winter cords lol I have more golfing clothes than normal ones and it seems I have started wearing golfing gear for everyday wear "just in case!!!" :D
 

viscount17

Money List Winner
Joined
Aug 13, 2007
Messages
8,704
Location
Middle Earth,
I say chaps, I think 'addiction' is a bit strong; addiction implies a lack of will.
I'll have you know my excursions to AG, directgolf and the pro shop are planned affairs - who knows they might just have taken delivery of new stock or have begun a fantastic sale since yesterday.
 
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